I sit nervously in the waiting room of the office, staring at the floor and pulling my bottom lip, most likely ruining my lipstick. The receptionist with too much make-up chews her gum loudly, probably checking Facebook, and it's really grinding on my nerves. I think she's Sophie, the woman who called me to make the appointment, but she didn't introduce herself and I'm feeling much too distracted. I've already been waiting here for 15 minutes and it's making me even more anxious. I feel like I'm exposing myself. I felt the eyes of strangers drilling in to the back of my skull as I walked into the building. On the train ride in, I was so sure I would meet someone I know and then they would ask me why am I wearing business clothes and what am I going into the city for and then I would have to tell them and I really hate small talk. I tell myself to calm down; I'm making myself crazy. Just breathe.
A door opens and two men emerge. My heart is in my mouth, and I know I'll be going in soon. I don't pay attention to them as they banter, shake hands and one man leaves. Stay calm, stop pulling at your lips and stop staring at the floor.
"Bianca Gold?"
My eyes dart up to the doorway, and I finally pay attention. Shit. This is the man who is interviewing me, who I could possibly be working with? I can barely look at him. He's tall, broad shouldered with dark hair, grey-green eyes, strong jawbone... the man is a walking cliché. His charcoal trousers sit just right and his shirt is snug across his chest. I smile and walk as gracefully as possible towards him. He extends his right arm and smiles warmly. His hands are large and strong.
"It's nice to meet you, I'm James Smithfield. Come into my office." His voice is deep and smooth.
We walk through the doorway James just walked out of, and it leads into the office space. He turns left and opens another door and he motions me inside the room, closing the door behind him. The office has a desk with a chair on both sides and a brown leather couch against the right side wall. I don't know where to sit, I've lost whatever confidence I had just looking at this man and now I seem to have lost all sense of myself. I look nervously at him and wait for him to take the lead. He sits in his office chair and I follow suit, sitting at the opposite side of the wooden desk.
"What can I get you? Tea, coffee, water?" he asks.
"Coffee, black, no sugar. Thank you." My voice is gravel but somehow, it comes out.
James picks up the phone on his desk "Two black coffees please. Thanks, Sophie"
James smiles at me, his eyes wrinkling slightly in the corners. He must be in his 40s, but I don't spy a wedding band. Jesus, Bianca! Get a hold of yourself; you're here to try and get a job and not to salivate!
"So, Bianca, tell me about why you're applying for a job as my PA?"
"I've worked in sales for most of my career. To be honest with you, I applied because I want to use my hands on experience in sales and marketing to learn the support side of the role." I say, aiming to sound confident while James' eyes threaten to make me melt. "Maybe one day take your job." I joke to try and break the ice.
"You would be more than welcome to it." James laughs. "May I take a look at your CV?"
Finally, a chance to draw my eyes away from him, I reach down to get the manila folder with my CV inside. As I sit back, James' eyes haven't left me and I smile nervously at him. I slide the folder across the desk and our fingers brush as he takes it from me. It's just a moment but my knees go weak. Another smile from James and I am thankful that Sophie chooses this moment to come in with the coffees. I was right; she was the one behind the desk. I thank her and bring the warm mug to my mouth, savouring the comforting aroma and take a large gulp to calm myself. James picks up my resume and begins to read.
"Your history in sales looks great, especially for someone of your age. So that's a good start. And, you joke, but this role has the potential to develop into more as L&L Foods continues to grow."
He asks me the same standard interview questions about my working life so far and he seems to like what I have to say. James doesn't take notes or read his questions from a prepared sheet, and he doesn't once break his gaze. It's an easy but intense conversation. I feel like I have the job in the bag, but what would I know? I can feel the interview coming to a natural close, and thank goodness because I feel tired, but I've spent the better part of 45 minutes watching James' smile and I don't want it to end.
James stands up and walks around to this side of the desk and leans against the edge. "Thanks, Bianca." God, my name sounds sexy when it rolls off his tongue "I'll be in touch."
"If you need anything else, I'm not working full time right now so I'm just about free whenever." I say, almost hopefully.
James leans down and takes hold of the strap of my handbag, lightly brushing my leg as he brings it up to give to me. He offers a hand to help me out of my seat and we are standing so close that the freshly laundered scent of him goes to my head. I smile and step backwards, almost tripping over my heels to break this tension. He still holds on to my hand, and leads me towards the door.
"Thank you for coming by. I hope we'll speak again soon." He says, just before he opens the door to his office, and the way he says it makes it sounds like something more exciting than just a call back for a second interview.
I am caught like a deer in headlights. I don't know how to respond, and suddenly the door is open and the real world is back around me.
"Me too. I mean, thank you for seeing me today." I splutter. We're still holding hands, and I shake his awkwardly and step away to leave.
"One final question," James says as I'm a few feet away "When would you be ready to start?"
That, I didn't expect. "Pretty much right away, if you need me. Monday?"
"Right, well I think I might be needing you by then. I'll be in touch." He repeats, and waves goodbye.
Leaving the building in the city, I practically power walk to get to the train station. I'm shaking, I'm flushed and my mind is racing with thoughts that need to be dealt with at home. What the hell was that about? He seemed like a nice guy and it's not that ridiculous a thought that he may find me attractive is it? Or did I imagine the whole thing?
I get inside the house, flick off my heels and head straight for the bath. I turn the water on as hot as I can handle, get undressed and look in the mirror. I evaluate every lump and bump, running my hands over my hips. Like every woman, I pick at imaginary flaws, but the way James was looking at me has left me feeling perfect.
I sink slowly into the heat of the water and turn off the tap. My thoughts drift as I lay in the hot water and it's no surprise to me when I start to think about James Smithfield. James' face, his smile and what he would look like out of those clothes – they all slowly come to my mind and my body responds. I run my hands across my breasts and pinch my nipples until they harden and I ease my touch, gently running the tip of my fingers around them before pinching them again. I moan softly. Yes, this is what I need, and I need it so bad.
I close my eyes and I'm instantly transported to my time in his office. James' hand brushing my leg, but this time he does take hold of my handbag. His hand snakes up my skirt and half way up my thigh and his fingers lightly tickle my skin. He gets onto his knees and swivels the chair towards him. Both hands reach under my skirt, hitching it up to my waist and exposing me. He takes a firm hold on my ass and moves my body forward so that my legs are spread, one on either side of his body. He begins to nibble my left knee, and I convulse slightly, but he continues and moves up slowly up my thigh. The tension is almost painful and I can feel myself getting wet. He reaches the hem of my underwear, and his teeth pull at the edges. His kisses move across my pubic bone and down, and he stops and nuzzles into my crotch, his nose rubbing my throbbing clit. I groan and push against his mouth and he inhales deeply.
"You smell so good...I want to taste you" James moans. His voice vibrates through me, and I am more than eager to feel his tongue. With one hand, he pulls aside my panties, brushing against my sensitive lips as he does so. He holds my gaze as he lifts his other hand and sucks his finger before slowly feeling the length of my slit and pushing inside me. I cry out and arch my back, thrusting my whole body towards him.
I'm lost in my daydream. I have two fingers buried deep inside and another two rubbing my clit. I am so close to coming. I can feel everything tightening and then...
