Many thanks to my sweet inspiration blackrandl1958 for her guidance and editing. Thanks to Todd172 for Beta reading.
*****
What's the American dream? Go to school, graduate, enter college. That's the beginning, and that was my life. Jane Marshfield, college student, and on my way to living the American Dream. In the summer between my junior and senior years of college, I met the man who would give me the rest of that dream.
His name was John, and we became a couple. Everyone assumed we would be getting married, and just before the new school term began, we gave each other our virginities. He made it official not much later. He proposed to me in the most romantic way, and I accepted. That was twenty years ago.
My mother and I spent most of that last week at home making initial plans for the wedding.
Back at school, while it seemed like I spent every spare minute on the phone with my mother finalizing the details of the wedding, I still made sure to show John just how much I loved him.
Although our sex life was loving and enthusiastic it wasn't very adventurous, but we were happy and felt no need to experiment.
The wedding was a week after graduation, and after a romantic honeymoon in the Virgin Islands we settled down to married life.
Two years later, almost to the day, we welcomed our son, James, adding another chapter to the dream. We became the typical suburban family.
Over the years, we gave the appearance of a happy suburban couple, and if you had asked us we would have said, "Yes, we're very happy."
As we watched James drive off to college, I felt a little empty, as a big part of our lives was gone. In hindsight, I suppose John must have felt the same, but we never spoke of it.
At first, we took advantage of our new-found privacy to rejuvenate our sex lives, though we still weren't very adventurous, and soon settled back into a usual routine. If I'm going to be honest, that was mostly my fault. John tried to get me to try new things, but I thought that we were too old, or they were too dirty, and he soon gave up trying.
We also tried to find more time for fun activities like dance lessons and going to the theater, but one or the other of us always seemed to have something that needed doing at work or whatever.
With John's encouragement, I started going on a Girls' Night Out with some of the women at work. This wasn't what you might think; it was completely innocent, a few drinks, a bite to eat, and some discreet dancing, as the Nuns used to tell us, "Leave room for the Holy Ghost!" I was always home around ten, and it felt good to blow off a little steam.
I'll never know for sure, but I truly believe that everything would have been fine if it hadn't been for Alice.
Alice was a relatively new member of our group. She was the sister of Sally, one of my co-workers.
Alice was a real wild child, twice divorced. That should have set off some warning bells, but as they say, "hindsight is 20-20." She loved to regale us with tales of her latest conquest; she seemed to have a new man every week, and I was initially shocked that she had sex with each of them, but I gradually got accustomed to her life-style.
She would always tell us about how much fun it was to learn about each lover, both what turned them on, and what they did to turn her on. She told us all the different positions they used, I was too embarrassed to admit I'd never heard of some of them. I'd look them up on the computer when I got home; some really shocked me, but some really turned me on.
The start of my troubles was when she would describe the men to us. It wasn't so much their general descriptions; obviously some were taller or shorter, fatter or skinnier, but what really caught my attention was when she started talking about the different penises.
The only penis I had ever seen was John's, and I had assumed that all penises were pretty much the same, but she quickly disabused me of that notion. Some were short, some were long; some were fat, some were thin; straight, curved, circumcised and not. She just went on and on, giddy about how much fun it was to "try out different cocks."
Most of the girls just laughed at her stories, and Sally, seeing the look of fascination on my face, pulled me aside.
"Don't let her fool you," she said, "It's not all fun and games. Why do you think she's been divorced twice?"
I nodded and thanked her for her concern, but it was too late; the hook had been set.
I thought about all the experiences I had missed being only with John all these years; I began to feel cheated, deprived, and made up my mind to do something about it.
My opportunity came with the arrival of a new employee, Larry Saunders. Larry was a few years younger than I was, in his mid-thirties, and was quite the hunk!
He wore no ring and made no effort to show that he was in any sort of relationship. Quite the contrary, he went out of his way to chat with, and yes, flirt with any of the female employees who showed the slightest interest, with no regard to their relationship status.
The men in the office hated him, but they were obviously jealous of his good looks and all the female attention he got.
He soon started showing up at our GNO's, and at first I mentioned it to John, casually laughing off his obvious Lounge Lizard moves.
I started to worry that John might get the wrong, or is that right, idea and crash the party, so I backed off on the Larry talk.
Naturally, Alice set her sights on him, and down-graded her wardrobe from merely "office slutty" to all-out slutty. She had no trouble getting her hooks into Larry, and they started leaving the club earlier, when they bothered to show up at all.
One night, Alice showed up by herself, and was nearly bursting at the seams to tell us everything.
"Oh, girls," she said, "he's just amazing! When he took his shirt off, his body was even better than I had imagined. It wasn't hard, but it was well-defined, and VERY comfortable.
"I was disappointed when he turned around to take his pants off, until I saw his ass. I never thought I could get turned on by a man's ass, but his is just incredible.
"Then he turned around and I got a good look at his cock! I've seen a lot of cocks, and his wasn't the longest or the thickest, but there was something about it that was just beautiful. More importantly, he knew how to use it!
"He quickly undressed me, and I was getting wetter and wetter until he pulled my panties off with his teeth. He was about to go down on me, but I was ready to fuck!
"'Never mind that,' I said, 'Just fuck me,' and I'll be damned if he didn't do just that. I don't think that I can ever settle down, but if there's one thing that could make me, it would be 'Larry's Magic Dick,' but I don't think he's ready to settle down, either."
Though I was pretty inexperienced, the other women weren't exactly innocent lambs, but there still wasn't a closed mouth anywhere at the table.
At that moment, I decided that Larry would be my tool to broaden my sexual horizons. I wasn't overly concerned about poaching on Alice's territory; Larry didn't seem like the "one-woman man" type, and the way he kept bird dogging around the office it certainly seemed that he considered himself available.
My problem was John. I loved John with all my heart and didn't want to lose him, and certainly didn't want to cheat on him.
I stewed about it for several days. John noticed that I was out of sorts and asked me what was wrong.
"Nothing," I said, the famous female answer that every man knows means SOMETHING.
He just gave me an odd look and let the matter drop.
I was at my wit's end when I decided I needed to hear the voice of experience, and asked Alice to stick around when the others left.
I explained my problem, that John had been my first, and that I had the urge, the need, to see what another man was like. I was careful to not let on that I intended Larry to be my target.
"That's easy," she said, "John loves you, right?"
"Of course," I said, "and I love him, too."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just tell him."
"Tell him?" I cried, "How can I tell him I want to fuck another man?"
"Just tell him," she repeated. "Tell him that you need this, and that if he really loves you he'll let you have it."
"What if he says no?"
She just laughed.
"Tell him you're going to do it anyway, that he doesn't own you, that you're going to do it whether he likes it or not! Then go take a shower and put on your sexiest underwear; if he's watching, so much the better. Then put on your sexiest LBD and you highest CFM heels, grab your purse and go right out the door, breezing right past him.
"By the way, do you shave?"
"Of course I shave, doesn't everyone?"
"I don't mean your underarms and legs, I mean your bush, your pussy?"
"N... No," I said, blushing.
"You may want to do that. Whether he sees it before you go out or after you come home, he'll know that you didn't do it for him."
The conversation was really going places I had never thought of. I had a passing thought that I was talking to a twice divorced woman, but I pushed it down out of my consciousness.
"Well, I've got to be going," she said, "My latest boy-toy is waiting, and I don't want him looking for a new playmate! Let me know how you make out, pun intended."
With that she was gone in a cloud of cheap perfume, leaving me a bit dazed and confused.
I was still unsure of what I was going to do, but one thing I DID do was make more of an effort to be loving toward John. Whatever happened he didn't deserve the way I had been treating him, and if I'm going to be totally honest, I wanted some "good will" in the bank.
I finally made my decision; I was going to do this. Once again, in hindsight I can see that I was out of my mind, but at the time I was blinded by some form of temporary insanity into believing that I deserved this.
I started out by being more responsive to Larry's flirtations, and being more aggressive in my own flirtations.
This led to some coffee and lunch breaks together, along with some close dancing at the GNO's.
Just as I was going to raise the subject of raising our "relationship" to the next level, Larry beat me to it.
"Okay, Jane," he said, "we've been tip-toeing around the issue for a couple of weeks now. You know I want you, and you've made it pretty obvious that you're hot for me, too. I think it's time to put up or shut up. If you really want this, let's do it, if not, you've got to let me know. There are other fish in the sea."
"I know, Larry, I know. You have to understand that this may be old hat to you, but I've never done anything like this before. I need time to talk to John first."
"John, your husband?" he yelped, nearly jumping out of his seat. "Why in the world would you want to talk to him about this?"
"Because I love him, and could never cheat on him."
"Just what do you think he'll say when you tell him that you want to fuck me?"
"First of all, I'd never put it that crudely, I'd say that I want to have sex with you. Second, I'll try to reassure him that my love for him hasn't lessened, that this is just something I need, that if he really loves me he'll let me have it. Besides, I've never had sex with anyone else. I want to know what it's like to be with someone else."
"Didn't you tell me that he's also never been with anyone else?"
"Yes, but I don't see what difference that makes."
"What if he decides that it's such a good idea that he wants to try another woman as well?"
I was a bit taken aback by Larry's question, but I soon recovered.
