Before you jump into my latest story, I wanted to mention a few things. First of all, keep in mind that this is just fiction. Please don't send me hateful comments that this situation couldn't possibly happen. Life is pretty strange and just about anything is possible.
I'd like to say just a word about the feedback. I do read it and take the criticism to heart. Having said that, I do not go back and correct grammar or spelling mistakes. I view my stories like I view my kids. I did the best I could for my kids and then let them find their way in the world. I let them solve their own problems, but I stand ready to help if they have a major problem, they can't handle by themselves. I consider my stories the same way. I do the best I can and then release them to be read. If there is a major problem with a story, I will go back and take a look. Otherwise, it is what it is.
I'd like to share one comment that really cracked me up. It was a criticism that I was an amateur because the commenter felt I don't outline my stories. I do outline my stories, but who the hell does this person think writes for this site, Ernest Hemingway?
The Prenup
My life is totally fucked up. I had just gotten home from work when my wife of twelve years, Lisa, started screaming at me. I had been dreading this moment but knew it was coming one day. In an effort of full disclosure, my wife had a right to be furious with me; I was cheating on her. But in my own defense, she was cheating on me, and her cheating started at least six months before mine. And while I had known about Lisa's infidelity for years, apparently, she had only just discovered mine.
Like I said, my life is totally fucked up, and I'm pretty sure none of you will believe me when I tell you about it. Hell, If I weren't living it, I wouldn't believe it either.
As soon as I opened the front door, Lisa screamed at the top of her lungs, "YOU"RE A FUCKING PIG!" From there, the conversation went downhill. In fact, as I think back on it, Lisa's opening remarks were the kindest things she said about me during her tirade. While I was only catching every third word, it was crystal clear that Lisa had discovered that I had a special lady friend, and she was less than pleased.
Even if I could have gotten a word in edgewise, I couldn't think of anything to say that would calm the situation. So, I just stood there, staring at the floor, trying to figure out what the best escape route would be if Lisa became violent.
Finally, when Lisa had calmed down, she said, "Well, what do you have to say for yourself. Why shouldn't I just file for divorce?"
"Well, to begin with," I said softly. "I know you've been having an affair for the last nine years. So, I agree, we probably should get a divorce."
"What? What are you talking about?" Lisa was stunned, and the color had drained from her face.
I reached into my briefcase and pulled out several pictures, which I gave to Lisa. They were pictures of her infidelity.
I wasn't sure what to expect but what I got totally surprised me. I should explain that Lisa is incredibly wealthy and could send an army of lawyers against me. But, instead of the angry explosion I expected, Lisa dropped the pictures and started to sob. Then she looked at me with an expression of total agony and loss.
What she said next totally stunned me.
"I don't want a divorce. I love you." Then she fled to our bedroom.
Her reaction stunned me and left me even more confused than I normally am. Lisa is the most beautiful woman I had ever known. I never expected, in my wildest imagination, that we would ever wind up together. And when we did marry, I expected Lisa to grow tired of our relationship and kick me to the curb within a year or two.
One of the quirks about our marriage was that Lisa's family was incredibly wealthy and insisted on a prenuptial agreement. I, of course, agreed. However, one clause almost caused me to walk away. Lisa insisted that the prenuptial agreement state that there would be no children from this marriage, and I finally agreed. I thought long and hard about that clause, but by then, I was hopelessly in love with Lisa. However, by this story's end, I would wind up with four kids. Did I mention that my life was totally fucked up?
I suppose I should give a little backstory to all this. Lisa Gravois is my wife. My name is David Toddman. Obviously, my wife didn't take my last name. Long story short, Lisa's family owns one of the most exclusive perfume companies in the world, and the family name is branded. And since Lisa is part owner of the business,
Gravois Scents
, it made sense for her to keep her maiden name. At first, I wasn't thrilled with the idea, but over the years, it has worked out quite nicely for me. Because Lisa kept her last name and I kept mine, many people don't realize that we're married. It gives me a certain amount of anonymity.
I truly meant what I said at the beginning of this story. When we married, I couldn't believe that Lisa had chosen me. I mean, she was a stunning beauty, and she still is. Lisa's almost six feet tall with long black hair and the deepest blue eyes you'll ever see. She had the figure of a model with slightly larger breasts. In fact, Lisa did model for a short time in her teens. I'm not a bad-looking guy, but I'm no movie star. I'm an inch over six feet, with sandy-colored hair, and I keep myself in shape. Even so, Lisa was way out of my league, and I knew it.
I met Lisa at a party thrown by my college roommate and his wife in the Hamptons. He was a commodities trader and was doing extremely well. His wife Beth went to Vassar with Lisa, and they were very close friends.
When I was introduced to Lisa, I was duly impressed, as was every other male in the room. I mean, she just radiates sex and beauty. She had all the single guys and most married ones drooling. But as I said, she was out of my league, so I started chatting up some of the other single women in the room. I have a friend who once advised me to only date girls in my league or even poach in some of the lower leagues. Otherwise, you'd waste your evening talking up a woman that was going to leave with someone else.
I know it sounds like a "chicken shit" dating philosophy, and I don't wholly subscribe to it. However, I do admit that I practice a modified version. I simply classify women as to whether I feel that they're out of my league or not. Why should I spend my time on a girl who will shoot me down anyway? I believe in being realistic. The only exception is if there is a girl obviously out of my league but known to be easy, then I'll take a shot.
However, every time I turned around this particular night, Lisa seemed to be at my elbow. The first few times, I chalked it up to coincidence, but by the fourth time, it became clear that Lisa was interested in me. I was flattered but also uncomfortable. I figured she was slumming, and when she got tired of me, she'd toss me back. I wasn't interested in being someone's pet project for the month.
Maybe that was her plan, but I didn't let it get far enough to discuss it. Yet, after that party, Lisa pursued me. As I said, I'm an alright-looking guy, but what the hell did Lisa Gravois want with me. I was just a software salesman. Don't get me wrong, I'm a damn good software salesman. And after only four years working for the same company, I was one of the Senior Sales Directors with a salary in the mid-five figure range. But that's peanuts to what Lisa makes. Her salary without bonuses is forty million dollars a year. So, I think you can understand why I thought Lisa was just playing with me.
Perhaps my disinterest spurred Lisa on, but in the end, she wore me down. It took her four weeks to get me to go on a date with her. It took six months before we slept together and a little over a year before we married. It was an embarrassingly extravagant wedding. There were six hundred guests, and I heard it cost about six million dollars. But that's chicken feed to one of the heirs to the Gravois fortune.
Of course, her family insisted that I sign a pre-nuptial agreement. I know Lisa was embarrassed to ask me, but I had no objections. I understood the necessity of having one, and besides, I made a good salary on my own. So, I didn't care about her money. Yet, when I agreed to sign, Lisa was as happy as could be. She told me that her family would disown her if she married me without the agreement. But according to Lisa, she was going to marry me come hell or high water. Still, I couldn't help but wonder how long the marriage would last.
According to the prenup, if we got divorced before three years, I would only get $500,000. That absolutely flabbergasted me. I had never heard anyone put "only" before $500,000. But it got better. Every year we stayed married over the three years, I would receive an additional $500,000 or a pro-rata share for whatever percentage of the year we were still husband and wife. In case of a divorce, Lisa could make no claims against my assets. On the other hand, I couldn't make any claims against any of her assets either. But the best part about the whole agreement was that I got to sleep with the most beautiful woman in the world, and if she kicked me to the curb, I'd get at least $500,000.
Of course, the prenup spelled out that we both agreed to forego having children. While I finally agreed to that stipulation, Lisa's parents were decidedly unhappy with the no children clause. But Lisa did not have a close relationship with her parents. Apparently, she only saw them during board meetings, and she claimed that they liked her brothers better than her. Besides, she had already had the battle over no children with them years ago. Not surprisingly, we saw very little of them over the years. And when they did come to visit, it was very awkward, especially for me because they looked at me as something lower than pond scum.
I have to say that the first three years of marriage were really great. I really believed she did love me during those blissful years. But shortly after our third anniversary, I discovered that Lisa was cheating on me.
Our marriage was really unconventional. Lisa traveled extensively for the company. I would say that she was gone about a week out of every month. And in the early years, I traveled with her as often as possible. Sometimes she was home for five or six weeks in a row, but those times were rare. However, whenever she returned home, she'd flat wear me out in the bedroom.
My discovery of Lisa's cheating started with a picture in the newspaper. Because of who Lisa is, she is frequently mentioned or pictured on the society pages. So, I religiously scanned that section of the paper every day. On one particular day, I just glanced at a picture from a party in Paris, and I almost missed it. It finally took a magnifying glass to confirm what I thought the picture showed. On the right side of this particular picture, I saw someone that looked like Lisa. With a magnifying glass, I confirmed it. So, you're probably saying, "What's the big deal?" It was a big deal because, at that particular moment, Lisa was supposed to be in Japan, negotiating something for the company.
Still, there could be many reasons why Lisa was in Paris. But I couldn't think of why she'd change her trip and not tell me. Still, I needed to find out more. This could have been a simple last-minute snafu in her schedule. But I had to find out what was going on. When we were first married, Lisa asked me to quit my job, so I could travel with her. I told her I didn't want to be a kept man. Eventually, she stopped asking.
