Teresa and I had been invited to my friends evening wedding reception. I had been looking forward to this night for some time and we'd even come home from holiday earlier in order to go. It was a chance to see some old mates I'd not seen for a couple of years since Sturmey shut its gates for the last time. A chance to see how people had changed and adapted to "life after Sturmey". It was the people that made that place, and you never know what you've got 'till it's gone.
Babysitter, my mum had arrived during the afternoon and we'd said the children could stay up late as a special treat. Originally we'd planned to take them with us but thought the late night and smoky atmosphere would do them more harm than good. Anyway it's not often Tree and I get out on our own. We estimated that it would take us about fifty minutes to get there, just a blast down the A38 according to the AA road map web site.
The problem of deciding what to buy the bride and groom had been eradicated by them requesting gift tokens instead, a good idea seeing as they'd been living together for the past couple of years and had already got most of the stuff newly weds would need to set up home anyway.
It was a cool August night, cooler than usual, which was disappointing as the weather recently had been fantastic. It meant Tree had to cover up the best parts of her tanned body, as well as her arms and ankles.
We thought we'd have plenty of time to get there for eight to eight fifteen if we set off at 7:15. It was still light. Straight up the A38, took a 5-minute detour to show Tree where I work, then back on track to the wedding.
At the end of the A38 Tree said take a left, which soon took us through a sleepy village. "This can't be right?" I said questionably.
We carried on what we thought to be the correct route, by now it was 8:30 and dusk; I switched the car lights on.
"Well they'll think we're not coming now." I said to Teresa.
She didn't say anything.
It wasn't any ones fault that we were lost; the main thing was to get back on course.
All we could see was fields.
I think we'd resigned ourselves to the fact that we were never going to get to the wedding tonight.
I needed a toilet quickly.
"We'll have to stop soon Tree" I said. "Look out for a pub".
The next pub was in a village that seemed to consist of just the one street, half-a-dozen houses.
"It'll be full of old fogies," Tree said
"Just so long as it has a Gents," I said panicking.
I pulled into the gravely car park and skidded into a plot, jumped out and made our way into the pub; trying to look calm.
It was dead, not a sole in the Bar and just a three old gents in the Lounge area, and of course the barmaid and she was serving both Bar and the Lounge, not that she was rushed off her feet.
I asked Tree to get us a drink each while I headed for the loo.
When I returned a coach full of guys had just arrived while I'd been in the Gents.
I couldn't see Tree.
Eventually I saw her she was still at the bar surrounded by these guys.
I made my way towards her when I realised they all thought she was on her own.
One or two of them were trying to chat to her and touch her up at the same time.
I saw at least one guy grope her boobs from behind, whilst another took a handful of her arse.
Excuse me guys I said bravely and ushered Tree to a table away from the bar.
"Lets go" Tree said
"We can't just yet, they might follow us," I said.
So we sat sipping our drinks for what seemed like an eternity.
We were nearly at the end of our drinks when two of the guys came over and introduced themselves as John and Frankie. They explained they were part of a gymnastics team returning home from a competition they'd just won and were in high spirits.
They all looked larger than life, fit and healthy which seemed to add up.
They offered to buy us a drink as an apology for earlier.
"That's alright." I said, but Tree interrupted "OK I'll have a double G & T".
As the guys went to get Tree her drink I said "What you playing at?"
"It was me you left at the Bar when they all came in, I didn't know what to do, they would have been all over me if you hadn't of come in when you did, I need a drink!"
I wasn't sure if she was complaining about the fact that I turned up when I did or that I turned up at all?????
"I'm sorry," I said trying to be sympathetic.
Moments later the John and Frankie returned with Teresa's drink.
After a couple of minutes the rest of the group gathered round, there was about twelve of them; all six foot plus, muscular and fit looking.
One of them asked what we were doing in such a remote place.
We explained we were on our way to a wedding and got lost and that we'd given up any chance of making it now.
"That's a shame." Said another "Anyone close?"
"Just an old mate" I replied.
His eyes never left Teresa's stare as I spoke.
Just then one of them appeared with another drink for Teresa and me.
The conversation soon turned to the competition they'd won earlier that day.
"It'll be on telly next Saturday" John said, "Look out for me on the vault."
"I WILL" tree said.
