I've really only had one thing going for me most of my life. I'm good looking; very good looking. That's not bragging, it's the truth - which you'll likely believe when I tell you my honest assessment of the rest of my qualities.
I'm not smart, I'm not much of an athlete, I'm not a nice guy, I'm self-centered, I'm lazy, and I don't have much money. At least I wasn't at the start of this story.
Most of what I had achieved in life was solely because of my symmetrical cherubic face, wavy blond hair, and tall and slim body (which looked good but wasn't interested in hard work or athletics).
Because of my good looks I got laid often from the time that I was eighteen. I had very few relationships that lasted long, however, because when a girl/woman would figure out that I wasn't very smart, nice, or hard-working, they would no longer be enamored with my looks and would dump me. With one girl I tried really hard and she actually liked me - maybe even loved me - for a good six months. Then she found out about me cheating on her when we were supposed to be exclusive and dumped me.
I finally finagled an associate's degree in business from the local Community College, although it took me three years and I might have had the lowest grade point average of anyone ever to actually graduate. When I started seeking jobs I found out that - at least for a guy - looks don't mean shit. Employers are interested in what you can do, not how handsome you are.
By the time that I got out of Community College I had just about used up the inheritance my grandfather had left me when he died - my parents were not well off, and weren't interested in helping me anyway - and was desperate to find some type of gainful employment so I started actually visiting places and hand delivering my sparse resume, looking for some sort of entry level job. I was shot down every place that I went for six straight days. The seventh day I finally got lucky - and that was what it was, pure luck.
I was at the receptionist's desk in an ornate lobby hand-delivering a resume. All female receptionists were polite to me because of my looks, but they never made hiring decisions. A deliveryman happened to come into the lobby right after me with a really awkward box that had "FRAGILE" stamped on it in big red letters. As the delivery dude was setting his hand truck down the box tipped over. More by happenstance than an effort to save it on my part it fell on me and knocked me to the floor, but I cushioned its fall so that I didn't hear anything inside of it break.
Of course the falling box incident caused much commotion around that office as several people came over to help lift the box off of me. The delivery guy was very apologetic, and a number of people inquired about any injuries that I might have.
One of the people that was looking on had the look of the "boss man," which was confirmed by everyone deferring to him when he walked over after order had been restored. At least two people called him "Mr. Williams," and the name on the door was "Williams Securities, LLC."
I say that he looked like the boss because he was dressed in a three piece pin striped suit, with a monogramed shirt, a silk tie, polished shoes, and a jewel-encrusted watch. He looked to be about forty, handsome with perfectly cut black hair with a slight hint of gray at the temples. He was about six feet two inches tall, my height, and likely about my weight of 180 pounds too.
"Were you helping deliver our new server?" he asked me, not actually accusing me, but not particularly politely either.
"Uh, no sir," I answered, immediately adopting a deferential persona. "I was just delivering my resume in case you had a need of someone in an entry level position, and I guess I was just in the wrong place when it fell over."
He looked past me to what appeared to be two computer geeks who had already removed what I assumed was a new server from the box while the chagrined deliveryman looked on.
"Any damage?" Williams asked the computer geeks.
"Doesn't look like any, Mr. Williams, but we'll know for sure by the end of the day," one of them sniffled back.
"Well don't sign for it until you're sure - but we really need that thing up and going yesterday, so let's hope that it's OK," he shot back. Then he turned to the delivery dude and barked "Have someone from your office come by tomorrow and we'll advise if there's damage and if there is there will be hell to pay."
The delivery guy just nodded, and left with his tail between his legs.
While this was going on I was just standing there. Williams turned to me again and asked "What's your name?"
"Brett Saunders," I replied.
"Well, Brett, since you might have saved the server, and saved us a shitload of time and effort, the least that I can do is to take your resume," Williams shot back, holding out his hand to get a copy, not to shake mine. Williams was clearly giving me the once over as he said and did that.
"Thank you, Mr. Williams," I said, handing him a copy of my resume.
"Is this your correct phone number and address on it?" he asked.
"Yes sir," I replied.
"Are you married?" was his next question, which startled the shit out of me, although not enough so that I didn't answer it quickly.