It began innocently enough, I suppose. Joshua was a nice young man, from a good home halfway across the country. He was the first of his family to attend college. While he excelled in the classroom, the adjustment to college life sometimes left him struggling to make sense of his place in a world far removed from the simple, straightforward environment of his rural Virginia roots.
It was shortly into his second semester that he came to my office after class and peeked his head around the corner of the open door. His tightly curled mop gave him a unique look that I caught in my peripheral vision. "Come on in Josh," I said without looking up as I continued grading a rather unimpressive research piece on the explosion of consumer technology.
"Mind if I close the door, Dr. C?"
The tone of his voice got my attention immediately. His normally bright, go-get-em timbre was absent, replaced with a reserved and almost melancholy tone; melodic and beautiful, but sad.
"Of course, Josh, I'm sorry. Please have a seat. What's eating at you?"
"I miss home, Dr. C. I miss home bad. I miss mom's cookin' and working in the yard with my dad." Josh pulled up the chair and sat at the corner of my desk, leaning in and clasping his hands together on the worn, water-stained oak desktop.
"I miss my little sister being a pain in my ass. I miss Sunday dinner with the family around the table for hours, talking about everything. I thought it was the most boring thing in the world when I had it, and now....now I just want to go home.
Don't get me wrong, I'm loving college as far as classes and stuff. I'm excited about what I'm learning, but I go back to the dorm at night and it's just...it's just lonely. I have friends, we go do stuff. It's fun sometimes, but it's not home. It's not people I'm close to, not people I want to be close to.
You're the closest thing I have to someone who cares about me like my family does, Dr. C. It's not your job to make my college life, good, but...." Josh sighed heavily and his damp eyes met mine. I smiled and reached out to grip his forearms with both of my hands, squeezing supportively.
"You'll get through this, Josh. It sounds like you have the kind of home life that most folks today never get to experience. Your pain is the sweet pain of intimacy removed. Being surrounded by people who will always be honest with you and trust you is a precious thing. You're going to have a chance to build that for your children someday, using your degree to provide for them. Hang in there. Use this struggle to find who you are without that comfort of family."
I leaned back and studied him a bit. He was a handsome young man with almost a Mediterranean look about him. His skin was a light olive complexion, and his dark, tight curls framed his face, almost making his intense green eyes appear to be peering out from under a fur hood.
"I tell you what, Josh. Come see me tomorrow. I have an idea I want to run by someone that I think might help. Deal?"
"Deal!" he exclaimed enthusiastically, pulling his arms back to take my hands in his own and squeeze them in unstated thanks. He jumped up, his eyes shining with that unique light of hope through the residue of sadness.
"Dr. C?" he asked as he passed out through the doorway. I was still looking at him, smiling.
"Yes Josh?"
"Thanks, for listening. Even if your idea doesn't pan out, it helps just to talk to someone who gives a damn." Now it was my turn for my tear ducts to produce. I simply nodded with a warm smile and met his gaze briefly before turning back to my papers.
"Damn, I do love my job some days," as I turned my eyes back to grading.
The idea was to create an after church Sunday dinner atmosphere for Josh, and Molly had outdone herself: our best china on the table, cloth napkins, roast beef with rich brown gravy, and country style mashed potatoes. Though he was a year or two shy of 21, I broke the rules a bit and brought out a growler of my own stout beer to balance out the flavors.
Josh wore his Sunday best, a simple olive cotton button down that picked up the color of his eyes, tan slacks, and loafers that had seen their fair share of Sundays. I wore one of my better suits and my favorite tie.
Molly outdid us all. The sable fabric of her dress caressed her 27 year old frame with an elegant shimmer. She was the image of a woman who understood and appreciated the beauty of her own body. The pearls I had given her on our anniversary draped into her dΓ©colletage in three cascading loops, echoing the curve of the fabric from lovely shoulders to just the barest hint of cleavage. Her hips echoed the same curve against the fabric, pulling it a caress of her stomach that bore yet another oh-so-subtle curve, proclaiming her femininity in the most alluring of ways.