Forevermore

This is a sad story.

There is hardly any sex.

It's the second of the trilogy where I explore the aftermath of infidelity. It's supposed to be a homage to Edgar Allen Poe. I hope you enjoy it.

*****

Forevermore

Chapter 1

December was hot in Adelaide. Unable to sleep, I made my way to my study, fired up the computer and started surfing the web. After a while, I became aware of a soft tapping. Tapping outside my study door.

I closed my eyes and allowed my mind to drift back. Back to a time before Raven. Back 40 years, to the very first time I met Lenore.

She was passed-out naked, on a pile of coats, getting the shit fucked out of her. Perhaps I should back up a bit.

It was 1980, High Wycombe in southern England. I was 18 years old, thin, handsome (in my mind anyway) and had SO MUCH hair on my head. Friday night and I had crashed a party; I hardly knew any of the people there. Still smarting from being dumped by my girlfriend; I just wasn't in the mood; so I headed to the bedroom to get my coat.

And that's when I saw her.

"GET OUT!" He shouted.

"What are you doing?"

"What's it fucking look like...?"

"Mate she's about 13 years old!"

"Shit, they told me she was over 16. Fuck-it!" Pulling up his pants and running for the door.

"You didn't see nuffin! Understood?"

"Yeh, sure."

The strains of 'Happy Christmas (war is over)' filtered up the stairs. Somehow, it made me feel altruistic; so I started to dress the girl. She was tiny, about 4ft 11 inches. I sniggered as I put her bra on - she had no breasts, just big nipples, sticking up like cones. To my surprise she had a full blond bush - I was careful not to touch it (since it was matted with semen). I remember being amused; I would normally be trying to get the knickers

off

a girl on a Friday night.

I was just doing up her blouse buttons when another girl walked in.

"What'ya doing with Lenore?" I'd learned her name at least.

"Dressing her, she's drunk and some guy was fucking her."

"Fucking hell! She always does this - ruins it for me. Fucking selfish bitch."

"Listen, I think we should take her home."

"You can! I'm staying here!"

"But I don't know where she lives."

"50 Kings Road, It's just around the corner."

"Well, give me a hand with her," I tried to lift her in my arms.

"She's your problem now." Turning and slamming the door.

Abandoning the idea of carrying her in my arms (tiny as she was), I put on my coat and slung her over my shoulder. After a couple of shrugs, I found I could carry her comfortably enough.

Ignoring the drunken comments, I made my way downstairs and out to the street. The snow was turning to ice and slush, so I had to tread carefully. After what seemed an eternity, I stood before the door of number 50 Kings Road. I rang the bell, no reply. I knocked on the door, still no reply. I was just thinking about dropping her on the doorstep when a boy pulled up on a small trail bike.

"What you doing with my sister?" A little aggressive I felt.

"I'm bringing her home mate - she passed out and guys were... taking advantage of her," (I spared him the details).

"Shit, not again!" Unlocking the front door.

"Bring her in, NO don't put her down there, she's covered in puke, take her upstairs and put her in the bath." With his help, I did as asked; grateful that my ordeal was over and silently promising that I would never help anyone ever again. Coming downstairs, I went to rest my weary body.

"Don't sit down; you're covered in puke as well!"

"Oh for FUCK SAKE!" Lenore had puked down my back on the journey home.

"You better get out of those clothes, use the bathroom, I'll get you a dressing gown," He disappeared upstairs. And I slowly followed him. The puke was mostly on my coat and trousers; a knock on the door and I accepted the dressing gown, then rinsed my clothes in the sink

"D'you want'a stay the night?"

"Yeah, thanks, can't go home until my clothes are dry, what shall we do with her?"

"What do you want to do with her?"

"Nothing like that, I mean is she OK here?"

"Yeah, she's always doing this."

"No offence mate; but shouldn't you be looking after your little sister a bit better?"

Laughing, "little sister, mate, she's my

big

sister, she's 18 years old!" I looked down at her in wonder; she was my age! Then, suddenly, her eyes flicked open.

"How, how did I get here?"

"You can thank your knight in shining armour here, Sorry what's your name?"

"Edgar, Edgar Poe."

"Edgar, here, rescued you and bought you home," She looked at me, and just like that, I was lost. She had the deepest, the saddest brown eyes I had ever seen. The room seemed to crackle with electricity; it was love at first sight.

"Will you always come to my rescue?"

"Forevermore."

Chapter 2

From that moment on we were inseparable. I ignored the constant jibes and the fact that Lenore had to show ID to get into the cinema or a nightclub. Her brother Steve and her dad, Jamie were obviously relieved that someone was looking out for her.

The world has changed since then. Nowadays, if a girl is passed out drunk; touching her would be rape! Back in the 1970s, it was considered 'fair game'. If a girl got totally shit faced - she would be passed around like a packet of crisps; she would

definitely

wake up with a sore pussy from inexpert fingering (if not fucking)! I'm not excusing it, it was (and is) totally wrong; but back then; it was normal! Before you say anything - NO - I never took part in it. For some reason, I was always the 'spoil-sport' trying to stop it.

How had Lenore ended up drunk, naked and raped? It seems that her mother, Elizabeth, had died in a car accident about two years previously. Her dad had fallen apart and crawled into a bottle of whiskey. Starved of parental love, Lenore had gone completely wild, living from party to party, giving everything away in the hope of receiving some affection. Years later Dr Rob would tell me that she had lost the ability to create social boundaries and had become a 'pleaser'; put simply, she got drunk and she couldn't say 'no'.

Lenore really had no idea how many boys had fucked her, they just kept popping up. After one too many embarrassing parties, one too many fights where I stopped someone trying to drag her to a bedroom, we stopped going out places. We found a small flat in Beaconsfield (just a few miles away) and moved in together.

It was a very simple wedding. Lenore didn't want to invite anyone who remembered her during her 'wild years'. There was just us, my mum, my brother, and her dad. Steve was my best man. It was a registry office marriage. Regulation number of plastic chairs, sign here, initial there, I declare you married - next!

Her dad never did sort himself out, and in spring 1982 he was diagnosed with sclerosis of the liver. Lenore and I were attending college; she was studying to be a secretary and I was an apprentice electrician. He went downhill fast; I hated visiting the hospice, I know it's irrational; but it somehow felt like I would catch dying. It must take a special type of person to work with the terminally ill!

One day the Ward Manager whispered to us that the end was coming. As we entered his room, Jamie looked up at me pleadingly. Bending down, I could just hear him whisper.

"Promise you will look after her." I can't be sure, but I think he heard my answer before he died.

"Forevermore."

Chapter 3

There was nothing for us in England and Lenore wanted to escape her past. As soon as my apprenticeship was over, we applied for a visa to immigrate to Australia. Ramsey Street and Summer bay beaconed irresistibly. All up, it took more than two years before we were accepted. In December 1987, Steve drove us to the airport and we said goodbye to snowy England.

It was the most frightening thing I had ever done. A complete leap of faith. Selling everything, the house, the cars, most of our furniture; everything. Moving to a new life on the other side of the world. I kissed my mum goodbye, hugged Steve and we walked through the departure gate holding hands. I often wondered what would have happened if we had

not

moved; Raven would never have come into our lives. Well, no point in dwelling on what could have been.

1994 saw us living in a small house on the outskirts of Adelaide, South Australia. It wasn't Summer bay - but it turns out that it rains most of the time there! Adelaide was a beautiful city and we loved it. Lenore got a job working as an admin' assistant at a local medical centre and I started work for a security company, installing burglar alarms.

Australia is the perfect place for kids. It's basically a huge playground. Sun and sea obviously, but also forests, bushlands, it goes on and on. The local media exaggerate any danger, it was, and is, a very safe country. Strict gun control means that murders are

very

rare. The sheer number of immigrants makes for a naturally multicultural society. Domestic violence and Methamphetamines are a problem but on the whole; Australia

really is

the

lucky

country.

It was no great surprise when Lenore said that she wanted to start a family. On August 12, 1998, Elizabeth Virginia Poe was born. I was in the theatre when she was delivered by caesarean (the gynaecologist felt that Lenore was too small to deliver naturally). She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, as soon as I saw her I knew that I would do anything for her. Those of you who are parents will know the feeling of unconditional love that overwhelms you.

I cut the cord and took her to Lenore, her breasts had filled out and to the pleasure of everyone in the theatre; Elizabeth immediately latched on and started to suckle.

Lenore looked up at me with those soft brown eyes.

"Will you look after us?"

"Forevermore."

Chapter 4

The gynaecologist told us that Lenore had not fared well with the birth; she was just

too small.

He said that he was surprised that she had managed to carry Elizabeth to term. We decided not to risk it again and Lenore had a tubal ligation.

Elizabeth was the joy of our life and I spoiled her unashamedly! She soon grew as tall as - then taller than - her mother. They looked like sisters (Lenore being the younger). They were virtually inseparable - of course, this meant that Lenore and I had less time together, but I didn't mind.

Elizabeth did well at school, she loved the outdoor and wanted to become a vet.

We were overjoyed when Elizabeth got a place at Roseworthy collage, although we were sad when she told us that it was too far to commute and she would be moving to the halls of residence.

Her Birthday was on 12

th

August and she asked for a Mountain Bike, her friend Emily had introduced her to the sport. We spent far more than we could afford on the bike, but the look on Elizabeth's face made it all worthwhile.

Three days later, it was Lenore's birthday. For some reason, she was really upset. I bought her a bike rack for the car - I know not very romantic, but money was tight and we had to be pragmatic. I tried to make the day special, but totally failed. Lenore spent most of the day in her room crying. Nothing I could say made it better.

The next day I had to go back to working long hours - I was totally fixated on working hard and earning money. Truth to tell, we

did

have money; in savings - I was stacking almost everything into our retirement fund. Retirement was just around the corner!

Lenore would take Elizabeth and her friend to the Goat Farm, mountain biking every Saturday. To my amazement, after Elizabeth moved out, Lenore bought

herself

a second-hand mountain bike and continued her Saturday routine.

I just put my head down and got on with working. Soon, soon, soon, I would retire; I would be able to pamper Lenore,

Forevermore.

Chapter 5

February 2016, Elizabeth had moved out and we were 'empty nesters'. I was still working long hours, putting money away for the future. For some reason, Lenore never wanted to discuss retirement. At the time, I put it down to the upset of Elizabeth moving out or the menopause.

What I didn't know was that Raven had already entered our lives.

One day I came home from work. Lenore was sitting at the dining room table; she looked like she had been crying.

I rushed up to her, knelt at her side and put my arms around her shoulders.

"What's wrong?" she avoided eye contact.

"I don't know how to tell you,"

"Whatever it is - I promise not to be angry," had she crashed the car?

"I've met someone else, we're in love, I'm leaving you."

"WHAT?"

"I'm leaving you."

"But you can't, who will look after you?"

"Someone else will look after me from now on," My heart broke into a million pieces, I fell to the floor in shock. Without ever looking at me, she got up and left.

I don't know how long I lay there. The house was in darkness when the need to pee finally forced me to get up. I resented even peeing, it reminded me that I was still alive when all I wanted was to die. I know that, if I had owned a gun, I would have ended it right there. I tried to convince myself that it was a mistake, some sort of a joke and Lenore would walk in the door laughing, but after I discovered that she had taken her clothes and some other things; I had to accept the truth.

I got angry - how could she be so ungrateful, all the things I had done for her, all the times I had looked after her. How could she! Fucking Bitch! No, I didn't mean it, even now I couldn't hate her.

Sobbing uncontrollably, I grabbed the whiskey bottle and took a long drink. How could she, now when we finally had some time to ourselves. I loved her so much, she was my whole world.

"why god, why?"

Please just let me die, how long must I live in agony. I knew the answer.

"Forevermore."

Chapter 6

The End.

If you want a sad ending, that's where it ends. I guess that is where this story ends for most people. She leaves, he dies inside. They go their separate ways.

This story carries on.

Elizabeth came round the next day and found me passed out in a puddle of piss. She got me up and led me to the shower. I woke up in soaking clothes.

"Dad, are you OK?"

"No - I want to die, your mother has left me,"

"I know, she rang me this morning and told me! I can't believe she would do this to you!"

"What did she tell you?"

"She said that she had gone to live with Raven."

"You know him?"

"I met him, he's a slimy bastard! How could she be so fucking stupid! Sorry dad."

"Who is he?"

"He's the sleazy bastard who has been hanging around her for months, he told us about the Goat Farm, then just kept hanging around, like a bad smell!

GOD, I COULD FUCKING KILL THE CUNT!"

"Elizabeth Poe!"

"Sorry dad. I meant Raven, not Mum," As I took in everything Elizabeth had told me, my legs buckled and I collapsed again.

"Dad, please pull yourself together, I can't bear to see you like this."

"Please, just go away and let me die."

"I can't do that dad, I love you, I still need you. You promised to look after me! Now I'll look after you dad.

I promise to look after you dad,

Forevermore."

Chapter 7

Elizabeth came to see me every day and kept me alive.

One day, it was like I just woke up.

"For fuck sake, pull yourself together!" I shouted to myself.

Make a plan! And just like that, I was cured.

Grabbing a pen and a pad I wrote:

Options.

Accept the situation, kill myself.

Pros: Pain ends, Get back at Lenore.

Con: Elizabeth would be hurt.

Accept the situation get on with my life

Pros: Good for Elizabeth, Lenore is happy

Con: No! Just No.

Get Lenore back

Pros: Good for Elizabeth, Good for me, hurt Raven

Con: Difficult

So option 3 was the obvious choice; now

how

?

Kill Raven

I'd probably go to jail. Lenore would hate me. Elizabeth would be devastated.

Be Better than Raven

I'd heard about guys getting buff, making big on the stock market and winning their wives back. Whilst I could get buff - the chances of turning into a billionaire were slim.

Destroy Raven

If I could find some way to destroy him, financially maybe; then she would come back to me!

Brilliant, I had a plan but I needed a whole lot more information; a reconnaissance mission was called for. I can't explain how great it felt to have a purpose again, a reason to live.

I phoned my old boss and gave my notice. He told me that Elizabeth had phoned and told him that I was sick. I was a good worker and he begged me to reconsider. I told him that Lenore had left me and I just didn't want to work anymore. He was very understanding, thanked me for my service and allowed me to take holiday in lieu of notice.

Elizabeth arrived and was visibly relieved to see me up and about; busy and happy. I told her that she could go back to college - I was OK now.

A short trip to eBay and I ordered devices with no care for the cost! What was the point in money if I could not spend it on Lenore? Luckily the shop was in Australia and a package arrived, express delivery two days later.

I went out shopping and bought some new clothes, lots of tracksuits, hoodies and trainers. Wearing my non-descript running outfit, I jogged to the medical centre where Lenore worked. It was easy enough to find her car, and easy to attach the GPS tracker behind the plastic bumper. I jogged around the corner, pulled out my iPad and checked telemetry; perfect.

That evening, while I ate a burger, I tracked her car to a street a few suburbs away; now I know where you live! Eleven o'clock that night, I hopped in the car; then, leaving the car at a nearby park, pulled up my hood and walked to the end of his street. Success, there was her car. This was a little bit risky and I was sure everyone could hear my heart pounding in my chest. Raven's single-story house was at the end of a cul-de-sac. As casually as I could, I walked to the house and dropped a rock on the other side of the road. Of course, it wasn't an ordinary rock; it contained a tiny camera complete with a sim card. There was a BMW parked in the driveway next to Lenore's Toyota; enjoying the game, I decided to risk planting a GPS tracker on Raven. Luckily no one saw me returning to my car, because I'm sure that I was almost running. When I sat in my car and checked the camera and the trackers, I noticed that I was bathed in sweat. It was worth it; I had a beautiful wide angle view of the front of the house. From the map on the tracking app, I noticed that his house overlooked the park where I was sitting. Getting out and orienting myself, I spotted the roof of the house and that's when I got a big break; there was a gate in the fence. I needed to check it out, but not tonight.

The next day, over breakfast, I watched Lenore leave the house, I had not seen her for weeks and my heart nearly burst out of my chest at the sight.

"I'm going to get you back," I swore,

"Then I'm going to look after you.

Forevermore."

Chapter 8

Lenore got into her car and I tracked her to her work. A little while later a man came out. This was the first time I had seen my enemy. He was taller than me about 6 ft, well built, in his 40's I would guess, with a striking mop of jet black (almost blue) hair. Gotya! I had to admit Raven was handsome.

That evening, I watched her come home. She unlocked the front door, opened it, then returned to the car - forgot her handbag I bet - she always did that!