A small brown man in an expensive but ill-fitting suit sat behind the desk, smiling benevolently at the man before him. "Your complaints are not dissimilar to many I've heard, Mr. Frusten. Your wife has borne you the two point zero zero zero children she felt was her duty and has now turned her attention to other matters. 'Getting on with her life' many women call it. Sex just isn't important in that plan, or outright dangerous in case another one, two, or three point zero zero zero babies come along"
"Yes, that's it. I can't understand how she can do this to me!"
"She probably is not being intentionally cruel, Arthur. Most women simply have no conception of men's constant, overpowering need for sex, so she does not fathom the degree of your torment. I call it the 'sexless wife syndrome:' no miniskirts, no skimpy undies, no sexy sleepwear even when you buy it for her, no high heel sandals, no intimate dinners, no evenings out dancing, no giving or receiving of oral sex and especially no spontaneous, unprotected intercourse."
The man nodded sadly. "Is there anything I can DO, Dr. Vargas?"
"Of course, Arthur. You CAN just continue to take it, as you have for the last five or ten years. You are, what, 45 now? In another 25-30 years your sex drive may have diminished to approximate that of your wife's and you can spend your declining years holding hands and pretending you had been happy all the time."
"But I CAN'T take it any longer," the man almost sobbed. "I love her, but I can't go on without more sex. Isn't there anything else"
"You say you've tried all the women's magazine advice: leaving love notes, bringing flowers, buying her sexy lingerie, suggesting romantic vacations. But sows what you really have in mind is SEX and she's not buying it. Those things work only when she doubts you love her. Your wife seems sure enough you love her, sure enough she does not that worry your frustration would send you to another woman. No, there is not much else YOU can do, but there's a hell of a lot SHE could do. I think we need to bring about a convergence of your sexual fantasies"
"But she doesn't HAVE any fantasies."
"You may be right. When you first married, she probably had some ridiculously fantastic expectations of you. When she realized you were just a man, she gave up on you and her fantasies. Not to worry. In a way it makes our job easier if she has NO fantasies.
"But then 'converge?'"
"We simply give her yours."
"Mine? But I don't really have fantasies, either. I just want a hot, pregnant wife.
"Fantasy enough, some would say, but don't sell yourself short, Arthur. Perhaps you just haven't explored your deeper desires. How much pornography do you read?"
"Pornography? Oh, gosh! None since I was married. Deborah would kill me. Well, maybe a glimpse of 'Playboy' when I travel on business."
"Hmmm. Ever read smutty stories on the internet? MCStories. com? Erticstories.com? Storiesonline.com? Dark Wandereer.com? Or just the ASSM?"
"'A-S-S-M?'"
"'Alternative Sex Stories Moderated,'" the largest, most comprehensive site of all and maintained by readers who contribute money at:
http://www.asstr.org/donations.html
"No, none of that."
"Then you don't know if you have fantasies or not, Arthur. I think we'd better find out, don't you?"
"But if *I* don't know, how can we find out.?"
"Quite easily. I'll run a psychopornogram on you." He motioned to a closet-size chamber.
"A psycho-what"
"Never mind. Just remove your clothes and step into the machine."
"Remove my clothes?"
"Many fantasies -- the good ones, at least -- involve skin-to-skin contact with the opposite sex. The psychopornogram records your reactions as experienced during them."
"Wow! It's warm and slick and ...oooh ... feels like ...tits and ... ahhh, a pussy in here"
"Two very important elements in a male sex fantasy, I'm sure you'll agree. Sensors and nano-servo-mechanisms can adjust the organs to various size, hardness, tightness, etc. The "pussy," -- that's the default setting for the penis receptacle -- can also become an "ass," a "mouth" or a "hand" of various dimensions and gender."
"Gender?" No way!"
"We're very thorough, Mr. Frusten. Now drink this before you put on the face piece."
"What's that?"
"A small dose of hypnohol. You need to be very suggestible for the period of the examination in order to react fully to each fantasy scenario as it's presented."
And the face piece? Wow! That stuff is ... goooood"
Well your mouth will also experience contact with "breasts," "asses," "tummies," "clitties," and "lips" of both types."
"Mrmpffg?"
"Now just relax as the psychopornogram takes you through a simulated reading of all 735,451,837 - wait, I see my "Chloe and Mom: Conclusion" and "Fantasy Aftermath" have just been posted -- 735,451,839 stories on ASSM."
"Mghrkdv!"
"Exactly."
******
A few hours later, the same small brown man in the same expensive but ill-fitting suit again was sitting behind the same desk, smiling benevolently at the same man before him. "What's the verdict, doc?" he inquired.
"Well, for a man with 'no fantasies,' Arthur, you certainly have some doozies." the doctor chuckled. "Who would have thought? You liked a lot of some pretty kinky stuff, but the psychopornogram went off the charts when you hit the Frank McCoy stories."
"Frank McWho?"
"Well-known author. Writes fantasies in which incest is harmless fun and granddads and granddaughters, mothers and sons, daddies and pre-teen girls, uncles, aunts, cousins, nieces and nephews happily fuck up a storm, making babies out the kazoo."
"I wouldn't like that kind of trash!"
"Tell your cock that, Arthur. You came so hard you shorted out my apparatus. Clearly this is the fantasy we need your wife to fulfill for you."
"But my wife would never fulfill an incest fantasy of mine -- if I have one."
"Get your wife here for an appointment, Arthur, and leave the rest to Dr. Vargas."
*****
The office and the brown man and ill fitting suit were the same, but facing him was a well put together and very irate woman, a partially drunk cup of tea sat before her. "I don't know what kind of a 'relationship specialist' you claim to be, Dr. Vargas, but there is nothing wrong with Arthur's and my 'relationship' except that he wants to act like a fourteen year old boy."
"Could you elaborate, Mrs. Frusten."
"You know perfectly well what I mean," she glared, taking a sip of tea to gather her thoughts. "He pesters me for sex ALL the time. If I didn't keep him under control, he'd be asking me for it EVERY week, maybe more! I've explained to Arthur very clearly that we are NOT having any more children. Since I'm not messing up my body with artificial chemicals and I sure don't trust him with condoms, he just has to be mature enough to restrict himself to once a month during my safe period."
"I see you DO have a problem."
"I should say." The next sip of tea was more of a swig. "Besides being oversexed, I can't trust him. He knew I'd said one child was more than enough, but one night -- and the sneaky bastard knew just WHICH night to choose -- he 'romanced' me -- dinner, dancing -- and then, boom, back home he took advantage of my having had a little too much to drink. Before I knew it, he had his hand in my puss making me come like a cheap whore. He knows I don't permit that! After a few orgasms I was so addled I let him make love and, bingo, I wind up expecting again." The woman shuddered at the memory and sipped the tea.