I Need A New Plaything Ch 02

Trigger warning: Reader is privy to a conflicted female character that has private, uncomfortable secrets and honest thoughts she doesn't share with anyone, including her husband.

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"Mel you down here?" Todd whispered as he came down the stairs at 4:30 a.m. into an unlit living room.

"Damn. You startled me," replied a flustered Mel. She was sitting alone in the dark staring at the TV. The sound was off. She wasn't crying, but tears were close. She had been deep in thought and hadn't heard him get up.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. It's just that I woke up and you weren't in bed," Todd explained. "Hey, is that our wedding video?" an amused Todd asked as he noticed what was playing silently on the TV. "We haven't watched that in years," he said as he casually walked around the couch and sat next to Mel.

Mel flinched when Todd sat down, but he didn't notice. He leaned in and gave her a kiss on her cheek. She tensed up slightly, but again, Todd missed her reaction. Her mind raced back to yesterday morning, as she thought about the last man to sit on this very same couch and kiss her among so many other things. Shame washed over her as she involuntarily shuddered.

"Is everything okay? Why are you up so early, and why the hell are you watching our wedding video?" he asked with a smile.

"Todd, I'm fine," she replied somewhat unconvincingly. "I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to wake you," she said answering the first part of his question, but avoiding the second.

To be honest Mel wasn't sure why she was watching the video, but she was sure she wasn't ready to explore that question with Todd. She quickly changed the subject.

"Look at us," she said as she watched the two of them leaving the reception being showered with bird seed. "We were such babies," she commented almost to herself.

"We definitely were," Todd agreed. "And poor," he added with a grin.

Todd was in good spirits this morning and that was a relief, thought Mel. He wasn't acting suspicious. I guess I'm a better actor than I gave myself credit for, she allowed. Last night she wasn't so sure. As she had laid awake earlier, she was concerned that she might have acted strange when Todd got home from work. She was worried that the nerves, betrayal and guilt she felt deeply on the inside was displayed on the outside for Todd to see.

Luckily, when Todd got home he was tired. He had had a hard day. She made sure dinner was on the table the minute he walked in so they could sit down and start eating. The last thing she wanted was him standing idly by while she cooked asking her excruciatingly uncomfortable questions about how her day went.

During dinner she was careful not to over due it. She just wanted to get through the evening and get to bed without causing any suspicion. She had desperately needed the day to end; a day that had started with debasing sex with a man she barely knew. When Juan had left she was still on a sexual high. Her body was aglow with the remnants of her orgasms. It was as if her mind couldn't (or wouldn't) consider all that she had done; all that she had risked. As she had hoped, the morning with Juan turned out to be an amazing sexual experience. Yet, as she knew deep down, there would be immense ramifications. The reconciliation of those two conflicting truths, however, would have to wait.

Once Juan left she had been busy and therefore distracted. She had showered to to wash away all traces of him from inside her. She had brushed her teeth to remove the taste of his semen. She had changed clothes, tossed the dirty ones into the machine, and wondered if she would ever wear that dress again. She had put underwear back on covering some of the small red welts that he had left on her ass when he spanked her. She had cleaned up a small wet spot on the couch and carpet and sprayed some Febreze on the cushions to cover the smell of sex. She had also spent a few panicked moments fretting that a neighbor might have seen Juan leave or arrive.

What she hadn't done was take the time to process her willing infidelity. Why would she have spent hours pampering and preparing herself so as to ensure a man who was not her husband would be pleased? Why would she let a man command her to stand naked from the waist down humiliatingly exposed to his searing glare? Why would she allow him to spank and explore all of her with his hands and tongue? Why would she willingly take his penis into her mouth and enthusiastically swallow his cum? Why would she submit to him and allow him to fuck her in her own home, while her husband of 26 years was just across town at work? And most troubling of all, why had she enjoyed it to the level that she did? These questions were swirling in Mel's mind, but remained unanswered. These were the questions that had kept her awake last night. All the excuses she had permitted herself early in the week to pave the way for cheating on her husband rang hollow this morning.

The two sat in silence for a few minutes as they watched their younger selves get in the car, surrounded by friends and family, and drive off as husband and wife for the first time.

"Did we get married too young?" Mel asked as she was subconsciously looking for answers.

"Maybe, but I don't think so. We've had some tough times, but hey look at us now. We're living the dream," Todd said with a flourish as he spread his arms in front of him.

She smiled along with Todd. He was right, she reflected. They were living the dream. Their health was good. Both sets of parents were still alive and independent. Great kids. Secure job. They had some status in the community and lots of friends. They enjoyed each other's company and although sex was predictable and somewhat routine, it was also intimate.

But there were also some cracks. Cracks that weren't visible from the outside or even to their kids. Cracks that have existed for a very long time.

Todd was a great guy. He was smart, kind, funny, and a hard worker. He was ambitious, but not in a climb over you kind of way. He wanted to do things the right way and so far in his career he had. The problem was his career was all consuming. He worked 10 -12 hours a day and when he was not working he was checking emails and thinking about work. He was also tired, bordering on exhausted, most nights. Typical evenings consisted of dinner, maybe a walk, some TV and then he was in bed and out. They were out of sync. She was alone all day and wanted to do things; he worked all day and wanted to do nothing.

As if on cue Todd went to get up. "Well it's been fun reminiscing, but I got to go take a shower and get ready for work," Todd announced. He reached out and squeezed Mel's hand as he stood up.

She didn't immediately let go of his hand as he tried to pull away. "Can't you stay a moment? I can rewind it and we can watch the whole thing," Mel asked somewhat pleadingly.

Todd, however, missed the hint of anguish in her voice.

"Sorry sweetie. As enticing as that offer sounds I'll have to pass," he said playfully. "I have an early morning meeting and I'm already running a little late," he explained as he broke free from her grip and headed back upstairs.

Just like that Mel was alone again in the dark staring at the silent TV. This time the tears did come - in huge waves

By the time Todd had come back down, Mel had managed to compose herself, and had moved to the kitchen where she was drinking coffee and flipping aimlessly through her phone. Her eyes were a little puffy but her head was down, so the redness was not visible.

"When will you be home?" she asked as Todd put his coffee cup in the dishwasher and grabbed his briefcase.

"Usual. Sometime around 7:00," Todd answered as he kissed Mel on the forehead and headed out the door.

"Love you," he said as he left.

"Love you too," she replied to his back.

She stared at the closed door. "Do I?" she muttered. Do I love him? she asked herself again. If I loved him would I be lying to him? If I loved him would I have allowed myself to be so infatuated and carried away? If I loved him would I have let another man claim me, command me, and fuck me? She was intentionally torturing herself and it was working. She was so sad and conflicted.

However, as bad as it was being alone with her guilt and thoughts, it was exactly what she needed. Having Todd around was nerve racking. She was on eggshells the whole time. Once he left, she experienced a palpable relief. Mel hadn't realized how tense she was since he arrived home yesterday. The good news was that she had made it through one day. I passed the first test, she said to herself. But now she needed to pass the second test. "What am I going to do?" she said aloud as her voice cracked.

With Todd out of the house, it was time to answer that question and process her actions. She couldn't undo yesterday. Admittedly it had been wild, exciting and liberating, but it was also real. It had happened. It wasn't an abstract, harmless, sexual daydream fantasy that she had allowed herself. She had sex with another man. She had been unfaithful. Nothing would ever change that.

Okay, she thought. I cannot undo what I have done, but I must put it behind me. Todd must never find out, she thought. Todd is a one and done man. If he finds out the marriage will be over -- of this Mel was certain.

Mel thought back over her life. Given her state of mind, she gave herself permission to open a door to an old memory. It was a memory that she kept metaphorically locked away. Behind that mental door was another secret that she had kept from Todd.

Years ago she had made out with an old boyfriend when Todd was out of town.

Things had started innocent enough but had gotten out of hand. Alcohol, immaturity, opportunity, exasperation with Todd, and history with the old flame had all conspired to take her down a dangerous path. Luckily for her, she had stopped short of sleeping with him.

Mel stopped herself mid-thought. Who the fuck am I kidding, she thought. Todd wouldn't have cared that I had stopped short of sex. He would have been furious then, and truth be told, he would be furious today if he ever found out. He wouldn't care that it was a long time ago.

Mel let her mind wander back to that night 20 years ago. Todd and her had been married for just over 6 years. There is some truth to the 7 seven year stretch, she ironically thought. Todd was out of town on business; something that occurred with much frequency. She was was busy raising two small kids and resentful that Todd wasn't around more. A community foundation that supported the local parks and ball fields was having a fund raiser. It was sort of a dress up event. Mel was looking forward to it. She was tired of spending her days at play dates talking to other exhausted moms while wearing old, outdated clothes in case one of the kids spit up or splattered baby food.

She wanted to go shopping, dress up and at least make an attempt at being sexy. But rather than be excited about the event she was mad that Todd wasn't gong to go. They had one of their frequent one-way fights. One-way in the sense that Todd didn't fight back. He just said he had a business trip and couldn't go. He left it for Mel to figure out if she was going to go alone. What she wanted was for him to change his plans. What she wanted was for him to just once pick her over work. What she got was an "I'm sorry, but I can't go." Translation: go if you want, but I won't be there. Not for the first time, she resented the fact that his career and work always seemed to come first.

Screw Todd, she remembered thinking. She didn't want to go alone, but was damned if she was going to stay home. So she bought a new dress and shoes. She spent more than she knew she should, but she was still pissed at Todd when she went shopping. She secretly hoped he would complain about the credit card bill so she could lay into him again. The dress looked great. It was a classic sleeveless cocktail dress with a bit of a plunging neckline and came about 3 inches above the knee. The shoes were cute sling back sandals with a 3 1/2" inch heel. Todd had flown out the day before so sadly there was no one at home to tell her how she looked. Oh well. It is what it is, she thought as she finished up the instructions with the baby sitter.

Once she arrived at the event all her friends said she looked great and her friend's husbands all took some extra looks. The affirmation felt great and the party turned out to be a lot of fun. The food was just okay, but there was an open bar so everyone was having a good time, as was Mel. Throughout the evening Mel danced with friends and was thoroughly enjoying herself, even without Todd.

At one point she found herself dancing with her old high school boyfriend. His name was Pete. It was an innocent encounter as she ran into him and his wife, Rebecca, quite often. They were in the same circles. Todd and Pete, though not friends, were at least cordial. Less so for Mel and Rebecca, but it still worked.

You see Pete was her first love, and on this night, Pete was also solo. Mel still liked Pete and thought fondly of him. Mel was comfortable with Pete. Pete had a great sense of humor and loved to laugh. He was easy going and quick to smile. They had been good together. He had taken her virginity, and although it was awkward, it had been sweet and something she remembered vividly and fondly. Over time they had experimented in other things. Pete had been the first boy to go down on her and she had returned the favor giving him her first blowjob on his parent's couch while they were out of town. For three years they dated, which included the last 2 years of high school and the first year of college.

At one point in her life she was sure she was going to marry Pete. But they had enrolled in separate schools and the distance proved too great. Life got in the way and they drifted apart and moved on. No drama. No broken hearts. She dated and slept with several guys after Pete, but nothing too serious. Her junior year she met, fell in love, and eventually married Todd. The rest, as they say, is history.

Since then she was quite content. She certainly did not pine for Pete nor wish they had married each other. However, she did wish, on more than one occasion, that they could still be friends like they were in high school. She understood the complicated old flame dynamics between Todd and Pete and her and Rebecca, but it didn't diminish the fact that her and Pete had been friends for a long time and shared important history together. So this night was special in that they could catch up and hang out without both spouses getting annoyed, or worse suspicious.

The few dances turned into standing together in the same small small groups throughout the evening. They were enjoying each other's company so they didn't even make an attempt to mingle.

At one point they were on the dance floor when a slow dance came on. He held out his hands as if to ask, do we dare? What the hell she thought. Why not? It's just a dance and if Todd finds out and wants to show his ass and get jealous, then I'll just remind him to be my date next time, she decided.

She didn't remember the song, but she did remember how nice it felt as she allowed herself to lean into Pete as he wrapped his arms around her waist. It was also a little surreal. While dancing she remembered thinking that he felt different and familiar at the same time. He was the same old Pete from high school; the same Pete she danced with at senior prom. Yet, he was also 12 years older. He had matured and carried himself in subtly different ways. But rather than being awkward or stilted, the dance was comfortable. It was also a little emotional as the slow dance opened up so many fond memories and allowed some old intense feelings to come flooding back.

Enjoying the moment, she leaned into his shoulder and nuzzled his neck. Although it wasn't intentional, she knew her soft breath was right in his ear. She remembered whispering to him that "he felt good" and he responded by drawing her a little closer. She could tell instantly that the close proximity between the two of them was having an effect on him. Yet she didn't pull away being somewhat flattered.

She remembered teasing him. Something corny like, "seems like someone's happy to see me." Pete was embarrassed but not enough of a gentleman to excuse himself and go sit down. Both had a drink or two more than they should and the pull of high-school, first-love lust mixed with the alcohol and hall-pass from spouses allowed the evening to progress into risky territory.

At the end of the dance, Mel remembered excusing herself to go to the bathroom and collect herself. She was a little flustered and also concerned about inevitable gossip. When she came out of the bathroom, Pete was waiting. He held out his hand and led her down a hall to an alcove in the event center.

Before she could protest he grabbed her face with both hands and kissed her. She momentarily attempted to push him away, but the kiss felt great. She started to kiss him back and within seconds their tongues were intertwined and the heat of the moment started to mount.

His hands soon took some liberties as he began feeling her ass, squeezing and pulling her closer into his crotch. She responded by groaning into his mouth. She could feel his erection which fueled her own passion. He moved his hand lower and grabbed the hem of her dress. Within seconds he had the dress pulled up and bunched above her waist exposing her thong.

She was enjoying the sensations and didn't make any effort to stop him playing with her ass. At one point she broke her kiss and pushed him away a few inches to catch her breath. He took the opportunity, and newly created space, to move his hand from the back to the front as he slid it down her flat stomach and into he front of her panties and over her vagina. Within moments he had inserted two finger's and was cupping her vagina while he moved his hand in and out. His palm, facing towards her, was rubbing her clit while his fingers continued to penetrate her. She was soaking wet and could feel an orgasm building. She collapsed against him has he continued to furiously finger her. As he increased his speed, she involuntarily yelped.

The sound of her own voice jolted her out of the moment and back to reality. Fearing someone might have heard she quickly regained her senses, pushed his hand out of her, pulled her dress down and ran back to the ballroom.

Once back to her table she realized how late it must be as most had left. She grabbled her purse and headed straight out of the door towards her car. As she fumbled for her keys Pete walked up.

"What the hell Mel," Pete said. "Why did you run away?"

Mel was flustered and perturbed.

"Really?" she spat. "You don't know why I pulled your fingers out of my vagina?" she added sarcastically. "Well maybe I started thinking about my marriage vows and my kids and your marriage and your kids for fucks sake," she said. "Pete what the hell were we doing? You know what, don't answer. Whatever the hell that was sure isn't going any further," she continued.

Pete being no stranger to dealing with all of Mel's various moods, got a little contemplative. "Well then what the hell am I supposed to do about this?" he said while pointing to his crotch.

Mel and Pete both looked down and busted out laughing. Pete's pants were tented straight out. The tension was immediately gone as they both kept giggling.

"I can't go home to the babysitter like this," Pete barely managed to eke out as he snorted back into uncontrolled laughter.

"Oh my God! Make it go away. Go jerk off in the car!" Mel giggled.

"Mel I'm not going to fucking jerk off in my car. You got to help me," he said. "You got me into this predicament."