Faith and Hope

This story is longer than most that I submit. Both parties in the first marriage make mistakes. There is cheating and a partial reconciliation.

I choose to be brave, or foolish you choose, and submit this under Loving Wives. It might also fit in Romance or other categories.

Be kind with the comments, personal attacks are removed. I hope you enjoy.

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Just how long does it take to run in and get "...a few things for dinner"? I was parked outside the local big name superstore; Wanda had to run inside to get a few things for dinner. It was February and the van was starting to become unbearably cold. She had the keys. She had a habit of doing things like this to me. It made me wonder....

I decided to step in, warm up and find out why she had been in there for over 45 minutes. 35 minutes later I spotted her slipping out of the back warehouse and heading in my direction. I stepped behind a tall rack of coats and continued to watch the warehouse for a bit longer. It wasn't long before Snake came out too; he was adjusting his shirt and pants as he walked out. I did not know him, just of him.

After he was out of sight I headed toward the front of the store and went into the restroom. When I came back out Wanda was standing near the exit doors looking for me.

"Bob, where in the hell did you get off to?" she almost shouted.

"I was wondering the same thing." I replied. "I was left in the car for almost an hour while you ran in for a few things. It was too cold to take it any longer, so I came into the store to find you. You were nowhere to be found."

"Was it really that long?"

"You have been in here for over an hour and a half now."

"I am sorry. I ran into Reverend Jones and we got to talking. I had no idea."

I had seen him walk out of the store about 35 minutes into the wait.

"Did you see anyone else and stop to talk?" I was getting a little sarcastic now.

"I said I was sorry, there is no need for that tone of voice." She always thought a good defense was a good offence.

I walked past her, grabbed the keys and headed toward the car. She just stood there and looked at me like I had 2 heads. 10 minutes later she was still standing there. I got back out and walked to the door at the other end of the store and went to get a cup of coffee and a snack.

As I returned to the car, a pickup pulled out of a spot nearby and went flying by me. Wanda was in the front seat and Snake was driving. I got in the van and went home.

She never came home that evening, she never called and she didn't answer any of my calls to her cell phone.

The next morning I was sitting outside her job when Snake dropped her off and kissed her goodbye. I got good photos of the entire thing. It was lucky I was scheduled to have that day off.

My next stop was to take all of my money out of the joint account and open a new one. I called and removed her name from the credit cards and bought new locks for the house. The house was mine; I grew up in it and inherited it when my mother died. Dad had died years before in the war; he knew of me but he never knew me.

I had her phone cut off; it was my account.

The next morning, when she had not called, I reported her missing.

After 3 days she came home. The spare key we hid did not work anymore. I had the van locked in the garage, the ignition disabled on it and 2 tires were flat. The valve cores were out of them. Her clothes were in trash bags on the front porch.

She pounded on the door for about a half an hour before she was interrupted by the police. They called me on the house phone, I did not pick up. Then they called my cell phone; I answered that one. I said "Sorry I am home to let anyone in." Then I hung up.

Wanda's side

I only went in to the store for a few things. I spoke to Reverend Jones for 5 minutes and got everything I needed. As I headed to the checkout I heard someone call my name. I looked around to see a high school friend walking after me. I had not seen Snake for 4 years. We spoke for a while and he was paged to come to the warehouse to unload a truck. He asked me to follow him. We talked a little each time he went by as he pulled 14 pallets off the truck. To be honest I completely forgot Bob out in the van.

After I paid for the things I went out and found the van empty. I went back in to look for Bob. I was starting to worry and feel a little guilty about the entire thing when he came out of the restroom. I called him and he came over to me. He was a little less than pleasant.

My first thought was I don't have to put up with that kind of behavior and just stood there while he snatched the keys and went back out to the van. I was pissed at the way he had spoken to and treated me and was waiting for him to come back and apologize for his rudeness. I could barely see the top of the van over the other cars out there. I waited for a while and finally decided to go out and give him hell. When I got there the van was locked and he was not there.

Now I was really pissed! Snake had just gotten off work and was heading to his truck; he asked if I needed anything.

I told him "I am cold and Bob has disappeared with the keys."

He offered me a ride home. Rather than go to our house I suggested that we go to his place and I would make the lasagna I was going to fix for Bob. As we left the parking lot I saw a figure jump back out of the traffic lane, it looked a bit like Bob. It was all so fast I was not sure. Oh well!

After supper we fell asleep on the sofa while we were talking. I awoke a little before I was due to work in the morning. He offered to drop me off. As he drove I saw the messages from Bob the evening before and decided I was too angry to look at them yet. Snake gave me a friendly kiss as I got out and ran into work.

I tried to look at the messages at lunch, the phone would not work. I called the provider and was told it was not in service. Now I was beyond pissed. I called home and the phone just rang and rang. Bob's cell phone would not take my calls.

I called Snake and left him a message to "...Please, pick me up that evening."

I slept at his place the next 2 nights; finally I decided that I had to speak to Bob. After work I called a cab and had him drop me at the house. It appeared that no one was home and the extra key no longer fit the locks. I pounded on the door in frustration. The police showed up and told me I would be arrested if I continued. They tried to call the house phone; it just rang. I could hear it. Then they called Bob's cell; he answered it and told them he was not at home; then he hung up. I asked them to call and see if Spike would come and get me; he did.

I was starting to get the feeling that Bob was going to be a little difficult. As I waited I wrote a note and slipped it under the door.

That evening I cried my eyes out. One thing led to another; somehow Snake convinced me that having sex would fix things. It was not even enjoyable; even though I did have a small climax once. The entire time I kept thinking about Bob. Just where did things go wrong? I didn't do anything wrong, it had to be Bob.

I tried to call he never returned my messages. I tried to corner him at church, he went out another door.

I mailed a letter telling how I missed him and was sorry for the problems we were having. It was returned, unopened, with the notation "Occupant does not wish to correspond with whores". I went out to the house and waited on the front porch; he pretended he was not there. I stayed on and off for 3 days. The police came and told me I had to leave or be arrested for trespassing and stalking.

Bob never made any effort to contact me.

I was starting to feel badly in the mornings. I did a pregnancy test and it was positive. I went to see Reverend Jones. He agreed to speak to Bob on my behalf.

The message Bob sent was "I had hid in that warehouse doing who know what, abandoned him at the store, my lover tried to run him over in the parking lot. I had lived in sin with the man and he kissed me goodbye as we parted in the mornings at my job. Bob supplied a photo as proof on that one. I did not remember the kiss until I saw the photo. Bob did not want to hear from me ever again, if I wanted a divorce I could file."

In so far as being pregnant "...that is what happens to whores."

I was devastated.

Snake was asking more and more often for sexual favors. I tried to refuse him; he was rough and just took me a number of times. Each time all I could think of was Bob and how much I loved and missed him. I would have moved out but I couldn't find a place I could afford on my wages. I was trapped; I had no family to move in with either.

Finally I broke down and went to a shelter for abused women. I was 8 months pregnant. They documented the bruises and other damage to my body caused by Snake's rough handling. Snake left town shortly after I went to the shelter. There was a warrant for his arrest.

They ran a series of medical tests to determine my health and that of the baby. I had syphilis. It was best if the baby was taken soon by Cesarean to avoid possible contamination.

The next week the child was taken out. I elected to bottle feed her, the medicine they now gave me for the syphilis was not good for the baby. She was having some problems and was placed in the intensive care unit; I was sent home before she was ready. Bob only visited once; he was not nice to me at all.

The forms all listed Bob as the father. I know that is correct; you see I am blond, Bob has bright red hair and Snake is a mix of Chinese and Thai. The child had the reddest hair this side of anywhere. After I left the hospital, I left town and returned to the area where I grew up about 50 miles to the north. I stayed in a shelter there for a little over 4 months before I was able to work and support myself. Then I rented a small room.

Back to Bob's story.

Wanda seemed to get the message after Reverend Jones interceded on her behalf. She never bothered me again. I occasionally saw her watching me while I was at work, as long as she let me be I was happy. Well, not really. I still loved her; I just could not live with her anymore.

My job is the supervisor of the town's recreation department. We run the ball fields and the swimming pool and organize holiday parades; among other things.

I took notice that there was a young mother and daughter who started to use the pool everyday. They came in wearing one set of clothes, swam for a short while and left wearing another set of clothes after showering. The next day they came back in the clothes they put on the day before. They had an older station wagon; it looked as if it was on its last breath. I started to notice the car around town in various parking lots. It was always parked off in a far corner as if to not bother the businesses there. They found a new spot each day.

I smiled and said hello to them as they came and went from the pool. After a while they smiled and spoke back. I noticed there were only 4 or 5 sets of clothes that they wore.

One day right after they went into the pool I went outside and checked out their car; I was correct, they were living in it. The inside was neat and orderly. I also noticed that wherever they stayed overnight the area was always spotless when the left.

Somewhere along the line I found out that the mother was Anne and the daughter was Mary. I was known as Mr. Bob at the community center.

It was nearing the end of the summer and soon we would have to enclose the pool so it could be used all winter too. We had removable walls and a retractable roof so it was open to the sky in the summer. The roof rode on steel beams when we needed to close it. The walls fit securely under those beams. In less than 4 months it would soon be too cold to live in a car, I was concerned.

I stopped to visit Reverend Jones and discuss what I had seen. I asked if he would be able to help them. He had little he could offer other than a few small, one time monetary donations. I asked if he knew of any jobs the mother could do. He indicated that he would look into it for me.

I had an idea that might be acceptable if presented to them in the right way. He said he would help if they came to him and asked. We worked out the plans.

The next day I waited until they were in the locker room and slipped outside again. I placed an envelope from the church under their windshield wiper. Inside was a note on their letterhead indicating there was help to be had at the church if anyone was in need. So as not to embarrass them, I slipped an envelope saying exactly the same thing under the wipers of the other 3 cars in the lot. The next day Anna asked me if I knew the good Reverend. I responded that I attended his church.

That evening he called and told me they had an appointment to see him the next day. As they spoke Anna indicated she was having trouble finding work that would allow her time to take care of Mary. We had found 3 families that would be able to take them in, in exchange for doing work around their homes; one was me. My house had a small apartment in the basement. The others only offered a room in the house. In exchange for domestic help; they could have meals and a roof over their heads. I couldn't pay them much, but there were other members of the congregation who would like to have someone do their heavier cleaning.

Another plus for my place was that the school was a block away and the church was another block further. If they wanted to swim they would only need to walk 6 blocks to the pool. I also promised that I would pay for a locksmith to change the 3 keyed locks on the doors to the apartment and all keys would be given to them. It would be up to them if they wanted anyone else to have a key.

A week later they decided to accept the offer and Mary was soon registered for kindergarten at the school. They moved in.

We did not see each other until the next Monday when Anne stopped in to get her work assignments. She was astonished to see me answer the door and started to mumble about how she had made a terrible mistake in accepting the offer. I stepped out and asked her to sit and we could talk about it. I sat in a chair on the porch and she sat on the steps.

I explained how I was still deeply in love with my wife, but that she had left me for another man. She lived on the far side of town now. I needed some help with the cleaning and quite frankly my cooking was intolerable. I was tired of eating half cooked or burned food, one time the food was still frozen in the middle and burned badly on the outside. I was even more tired of fast food places. I handed a sheet with a list of phone numbers on it. The list included the mayor, the elementary school principal, the chief of police and all of the town council. I told her to call any of them and ask for a reference, and no I had not talked to them about this.

Finally I offered to have the reverend come in as I took her on the tour to see what her duties would be. She would only need to be in my area when I was gone. She and Mary could eat downstairs if they desired and return the dirty dishes the next day.

Finally she calmed down and accepted the job as offered. They had already moved in, and my offer was by far the best. The sparse furniture that was in the apartment was older, but it was sturdy and functional.

Mary started school the Wednesday after Labor Day and loved her class. When I came home that evening she ran up to me and said "Thank you for allowing them to live here and attend that school."

I had left instructions for Anna to not fix dinner that evening. Instead I left $30 to order pizza and drinks for all 3 of us. I stopped and bought a small cake on the way home. We had supper on the back patio that evening. Mary, Anna and I played horseshoes and talked until 8:00, when it was time for Mary to go to bed. I said good evening and wished them a pleasant night.

The next few weeks we only saw each other at meals upstairs. I authorized Anna to sign for groceries at a small store just on the other side of the school. The house was looking better than ever. Anna was now working 3 to 4 hours a day for some other people too. She was able to buy Mary some much needed school clothes. I paid to have her car repaired at the garage since she was using it to run errands for the house. When she needed gas I left her some cash on the table. She always left the receipt for me, even though I never asked for one.

Then there was the call from the hospital, I was a father. Or so they said. I went down to see the child; I stopped in to congratulate Wanda on the lovely little girl. She cried and said she missed me and still loved me. She tried to explain how it was all a mistake and she wanted to come back home. I did not hear most of what she said because I was already out of the room. I submitted, as requested, a sample for DNA testing to determine that I was the father. I was almost positive I was. I still did not go back to see either of them.

Wanda was released a week before the child, she left town and never returned for her.

After Wanda deserted the baby at the hospital, I was called to pick her up. Frankly I was surprised that she was mine, but there was no denying the red hair. We had never used birth control and after 3 years had not conceived. When we were checked out I was told my sperm was weak; we would be lucky to conceive.

They needed a name for the child so the paperwork could be completed and sent in. I went home that evening with the weight of the world on my shoulders, or so it felt. I had been an only child; I knew nothing about childcare except for what little I remembered of my own and what I had seen around me. I skipped going into the house and went to sit in the backyard. When I did not come in for supper Mary came out to sit with me. Finally she asked "...why I was so sad?"

I told her "I was not sad, I was confused." I thanked her for caring about me.

"Momma is really smart, she can help you." And she ran into the house to get her Momma.

Anna came out after she put Mary to bed. "You look like your world imploded" she said.

I sat there for a while longer and then it all came rushing out. There was no stopping it; all the dirty, nasty details were exposed for her to see.

After sitting there for another little while Anna finally spoke. "You are a father, you are angry with your wife because she destroyed your life. This child has done nothing wrong, yet everyone wants to abandon her. She is your child and needs to have at least one loving parent in her life. Since your wife ran you are elected and you need her in your life more than you realize. Bring her home, Mary and I can help. Have faith that it will all work out well."

That is how my daughter came to be known as Faith.

After Anna walked Mary to school the next morning, she and I went shopping for the things I would need to bring her home. They were all delivered while I was springing Faith from her confinement at the hospital. She was screaming when they handed her to me; she immediately settled down and snuggled onto my shoulder. It took a few minutes for her racking sobs and then her hiccups to die down.

I had not bothered to put the van back on the road after I disabled it. I drove her home in one of the pickup trucks from work. Faith gurgled and cooed all the way home as the truck shuddered over every bump and pothole on the road. I really tried to avoid them. The car seat did little to cushion the rough ride. I don't know if it was so, but I thought she spent the entire trip looking at me through wide open eyes. The back of the truck was loaded with bags the hospital sent home; most of which I had no idea how to use.

The next day I called the garage and asked them to get the van and see if it was worth putting back on the road. For a little over $500 is was as good as new.