"Okay," Karen had said.
I was confused, "Okay? Okay what?"
She had looked straight at me, "Okay, we'll go."
"Go? What? Where? Out that night?"
"To your girlfriend's, to your little game."
That was Karen, the night before, right after I'd told her about Lush, my stories, Pauli, and the planned strip poker game, shocking the shit out of me. I remembered wondering what the hell had just happened!
Now, here we were, standing in front of Pauli's door and I was still wondering the same thing, what the hell was going on? This was NOT my Karen, not the Karen I'd been married to the past thirteen years! She rang the doorbell a second time and we waited. This time we heard noises inside, the door opened, Connor on the other side of the threshold. "Pauli's in her room getting ready, be a few minutes," then he stood aside to let us in. I saw his head cock a little when he took in my wife.
"You brought your wife, good," he said. At least he was polite, didn't make any snarky comment. Like I was trying so hard not to do.
I took that as time for introductions, "Connor, this is Karen," the bag lady. God, I hope that didn't come out out-loud. I have been known to do that, accidentally. "Hon, Connor," I said.
"Nice to meet you," she smiled at him and reached out to take his hand briefly, "you have a bathroom I could use?" she asked. That didn't take long, thought she'd gone potty right before we left. She always does.
"Sure," he pointed to the hall, "second door on the left," and we both watched my wife disappear down the hall.
Connor pointed to the couch, "Sit?" he asked.
Good, I was so damned nervous that standing there was driving me crazy. Of course, sitting would, too. But you know the old saying, 'least of two evils.' If you didn't know it, you do now.
Connor and I chatted for the next several minutes. He did seem like a decent guy. He asked again, "You've never done anything like this?"
I shook my head, "No, not ever, never even thought about it."
"How'd you get your wife to come? She do it before?"
I shrugged, "Hell, I don't know. I got up the courage last night to tell her, half expecting her to throw me out of the house and all she said was, 'I'm going'."
He looked around, to make sure no one, namely Karen, had snuck in on us, "That, umm, thing she's wearing. Is that... normal?"
I laughed, "I have never in my life seen her in anything like that. I have no clue what's going through that brain."
Connor laughed a little at that, too, "Women!" he said, understanding the situation at least as well as I was. Pretty sure he was hoping she'd look better without it than with it. Yeah, she does.
I heard a door open down the hall. A few seconds later, Pauli made her appearance. My breath caught when I saw her; silk, pullover blouse, bra? No way, her nipples trying to poke through, tight, tight, bluejeans, high heels, and a huge smile when she saw me. I stood and my heart rate spiked as soon as I saw her. Something else spiked, too. "Didn't I hear a female voice out here?" she asked.
"My wife, Karen," I said. Speaking of Karen, where the hell was she? Delay in the ladies' room is what had gotten me into this situation in the first place. "She's in the bathroom."
"Good," she came over and gave me a kiss on the lips. "Hope she's good with that, I expect some attention tonight." My heart was doing its best to beat out of my chest. Pauli's kiss ended and about a minute later, another door opened in the hall. Bag lady was coming back. I didn't understand why Karen had gone to such effort to make herself so unattractive. Hopefully, it wasn't because she didn't want to get Pauli's blood on her good clothes. I wondered if she might have had a dagger in that little bag. Maybe that was what she'd spent all day looking for.
But when she came around the corner, she didn't look like a bag lady at all, no dagger, either, more like a glamorous movie star at her movie opening. God, I didn't know what to say, she was absolutely beautiful! A lavender wrap-dress, one like she's never worn before. A big 'V' up her thigh where the wrap came together and another down between her breast; A wide strap over one shoulder, the other bare.
Then it came to me what she'd done. She'd just read the story of Adriana's college reunion and she found a dress replicating the one I tried to describe Adriana wearing that night. Her 'bag lady' look had just been a cover, from one extreme to the other, I guess to hide her dress until she got here.
Connor's eyes popped wide looking my wife up and down and Pauli's only word was, "Wow." Then she looked down at herself and said, "I think I feel a little underdressed."
"Babe, you're perfect, gorgeous," Connor said. My eyes diverted back to Pauli. She was, no doubt about that. I could think of a few other adjectives, too.
Those tight jeans, how the hell did she get into them? "Yeah," I politely agreed, "perfect," not wanting to say what I actually was thinking. Then looked over at Karen, hoping that I hadn't overstepped my allowable, whatever in hell my 'allowable' might be. And what about Karen, what the hell was her allowable?
Then my brain took ahold, at least a little bit, "This is my wife, Karen," I told Pauli.
"Pauli, nice to meet you," introducing herself. Then she smiled and said, "this should be a lot of fun tonight."
"Anyone want a drink?" Connor interrupted my ogling at his girlfriend.
"Yeah, sure, what do you have?" Karen asked.
He hesitated a bit, like he was trying to think, "Vodka, rum, whiskey, beer, orange juice, coke, seven-up, ginger ale," looking at Pauli, "forget anything?"
She shook her head, "Nope, don't think so, how about some rum and ginger ale with lots of crushed ice."
"Wine?" Karen asked. I cocked my head a little, I'd half expected her to just ask for coke or orange juice.
"Sorry, no wine," Connor said. I looked over at Karen. We both just realized we should have brought something. I think we were both too nervous to think straight.
"How about what Pauli's having, then," she said, surprising me again.
Karen and I don't drink. Even that wine the other night was an aberration for us. We know somewhere between nothing and nothing about alcohol. We both knew it wouldn't take much. But with the way Karen's acting so weird, even without it... And maybe I wasn't totally blameless. That brought a little laugh, blameless? Hell, the whole damn thing was totally my fault!