"so How Come...?" Debs Ased

{If you are looking for swinging, cheating, nasty sex then you won't like this one. That is because my wife Debra and I don't, not really. Well, sort of? We get massages, we tease and play a lot, and have fun with each other. We do HAVE sex, we THINK about sex, and the little woman is on the naughty side. Man is THAT an understatement. So all this is, is just some silly stuff that is going on around the old homestead, I write it down when anything happens. She keeps me on my toes, and I think that is deliberate on her part. Just when I think I have it figured out, and know all about my pretty lady, she comes up with a new one! And I concede that what she just did floored me.)

+++

"That last story was kind of cute, did you win?" My wife Debra asked when she got home from work the other day.

Debs is one of those Registered Nurse Practitioners, she works geriatrics mostly, which is old folks not quite yet dead.

Like me.

Debs is 58, I think. She sure as hell doesn't look or act 58, which I know because I get to see her doing her exercises before bed time.

I like the jumping jacks with her only wearing her panties most of all. She often tries to get me to join in but I do that down at the gym. At home I just want to watch.

Me? I am Dan, and in a couple of months I will be 70. Back when I was in my early 60's I was getting old, but I don't feel old or look it any more.

Well, I probably do look it, but I sure as hell don't feel it.

Why? Well, Debra, of course. I get my twice a week in regular as clockwork, the wife sees to that. That kind of regular activity keeps things going, kind of like making sure an engine is well oiled, I guess.

Some of you young guys might sneer at the idea of an old coot like me having an active sex life, fine with me. When some young folks are at the point where you can't any more, odds are high Debs and I are just getting started good.

Debra sees to that, like I mentioned, my wife is naughty. We are both also faithful, pretty much anyway. I think that part is in how you look at it.

I have never had full sex with any female since we got married, or in the nearly 10 years prior to that, to be honest.

I am also completely sure Debs has not, either, except for some Doctor she told me about that was maybe 3-4 years before we met.

I guess he was less than spectacular, I find that strange since he was a Doctor.

So yea, both of us were doing without when we met unless you count hands, which we don't. Debra did admit her friend July came by regularly and gave her massages for years.

I thought about that, with a woman? I would kind of like to watch that but at this point I never have.

I even mentioned that a couple of times to her, she just giggles and says "maybe."

Yep, Debs is naughty, so am I, I suppose.

She also has as close to zero jealousy as is possible, which is maybe a good thing considering something is going on around our place most of the time.

Debs knows I like women, so when she sees a cute one I get an elbow and it gets pointed out.

Like the black lady in shorts down at the waterfront, she was leaned over throwing hot dogs at the seals.

The term is "booty, and yes, dark skinned folks also have lighter areas where the Sun does not reach most of the time.

"Check out the ass on that one, honey!" Debra said as she gave me an elbow.

I looked, man! I also resisted the urge to slip up behind her and yank them down, get a better look.

My old head thinks like that but I resist those urges.

The aversion I have about going to jail keeps me in check.

+++

Debs spends one hell of a lot of time at work with nearly naked old men, and she has had one finger up literally thousands of old guy's behinds.

Some of those behinds belong to the movers and shakers of our little city, like that means anything. It really shouldn't but I admit that the thought pops into my head now and then when we run into someone.

So we run into the local judge, like the one that heard my case when government tried to claim I was dead some 3-4 years back??

Yep. Debs knows what his dick looks like.

County Commissioner?

Yep. Debs know what his dick looks like.

The pastor at the neighborhood church we go to maybe once or twice a month, when they hold those pot luck things?

Yep. Debs knows what his dick looks like.

Even the car salesman down at the dealership where we bought Debra her new Camaro, AND the manager that handled the paperwork.

Yep. She has seen about everyone's pecker for maybe 100 miles in all directions. Then there is Jack from next door, but he is a nudist so I have seen his pecker, too. His wife Lisa has a pair of huge ones hanging from her chest and I have seen her starkers at least two dozen times now.

As far as Debra poking and probing nearly everybody?

Just her job.

+++

Debs looks cute in that new Camaro, too. It has what they call the "Ghost" RS package, a V-6 that sort of scoots but does OK an gas.

The thing also dents easy, it already has several tiny dings in the door from the Safeway parking lot.

I don't drive it because I have to put the seat all the way down and back, Debs has to put it all the way up and forward, so I drive my big Dodge diesel.

Where the hell was I?

+++

I tease her about that her job the time, getting to handle everyone's stuff I mean. The real truth is she likes her job, I know because she told me so.

But she caught me a bit off guard with the question, not that I am ever completely on my guard around her.

"Did you win?" She asked.

The truth is, I forgot all about it since I have been working on a sci-fi story about a guy whose brain got harvested....while he was still alive.

Just think. The poor guy can't see, he can't hear, but he is alive and can sense? It would become like a fantasy world, lost in dreams, I think so anyway.

I do stories like that from time to time, having spent a few years in a wheelchair way back, it gives me some insight into being close to helpless.

The idea makes me ponder emotions, I have been working on that human brain story for two years now.

+++

"Don't know yet, not likely. There wasn't any nude in public stuff in it, I only wrote it trying to be funny."

"Honey, you know I read all of your stories, how come so many of them have women showing off their stuff to guys?" She asked with what was about as close to a straight face as she gets.

"Huh? What do you mean? I write about science fiction, romances, being out in the woods and nature, stuff like that?"

"Well, do you have some kind of hidden fantasy about it?" She asked, completely ignoring what I just said.

"No, of course not." I lied.

Where in the hell did THAT come from?

"I know you got all excited when I went topless on that cruise we took. All of those guys were looking." She grinned at me.

"You always get me excited when you are topless." I said.

"You are such a sweetie, but I am serious. Does it turn you on?"

"A little, I guess. Hell, I like looking at women, you know that. I am a guy!" I protested.

"Not other women, silly. I mean, would it get you going if some other guy got a peek at me?" She was really grinning now.

She sort of pulled her shoulders back, like she was posing.

Debs sure does have nice tits.

"Well, we ARE married, so some things need to be kept private, you know." I was trying to figure out where she was headed, I had already lost the train of thought on the crap I was writing.

"You can tell me, it's OK. We don't need to have any secrets. I know how you are."

OK. Busted at that. If you ever saw Debs in that leotard she wears to our gym? Let's just say that you would watch her too, it's a wonder I don't drop heavy things on my feet. All of this working out stuff has her looking...well, trim?

So yes, I do like it that my Debra gets noticed.

"Well, yes, a little bit I guess. Like way back when we went to that body builder show down South and Sid was up there all naked? I really thought for a minute there that you were going to get up there too."

(Sid is a woman from our gym, she wears these bikinis to work out in and her body is...well..spectacular. But at that show at the men's club? She was naked! That was something else, but the guys at the show decided Debra was part of it, so we got out of there.)

Debra smiled at me.

"I bet you would have caused a bunch of heart attacks, those old farts were watching you sitting in the audience more than the girls up on the stage!" I added.

"You really think so? Did you like that?"

"Yea, that got me hot, but we left before things got really good!." I smirked at her.

"I thought so." She went into the kitchen, looked in the oven at the meat loaf I was making.

"Smells good, honey." Debs went into the bedroom, I heard the shower start.

I wandered in and finished dinner.

Yea, I cook dinner for us, so what?

+++

"Just what brought that on?" I asked her as we both gave up on trying to eat any more.

"What brought what on?" She asked, giving me a look and then batting her eyelashes.

"You asking about my fantasies."

"Oh, that. I had a client today, she is maybe 30 or so. She was telling me that her husband has some bedroom problems, and the only thing that really gets him going is if they go out and flash people."

"Really?"

"Yes, and I guess she has done it to make him happy a few times."

"Like what?"

"She mentioned they went shoe shopping a few times, you know how over at Becky's Boutique they have those tilted mirrors on the floor so clients can look at the shoes when they try them on?" Debs was snickering a bit now.

"I don't get it."

"If someone is standing back a bit they can see right up her dress!"

Now I never thought of that, usually I go to old man Vidalis's place, he is cheaper. I do know that Henry Cotton owns Becky's, he named it after his wife. All high priced stuff, but he does have a lot of women's clothing, swimwear, some shoes with five inch heels on display.

"She also told me that she lets the men working there see up her dress when they put on shoes for her to try." Debs was snickering, she found that funny.

Hmmm...Becky's Boutique, huh?

In fact, Becky's Boutique is where Debs bought that tan colored leotard she wears to our workouts, the one that hugs her like a 2nd skin and has those snaps at the crotch I expect to let go in the middle of stretching, but never have.

I have seen her panties peek out just a tiny bit a few times, that always gets me to pay attention.

"No kidding? You mean, deliberately? Who is she?" I asked.

"You know I can't tell you that. Anyway, she does that for her husband and says it gets him all excited, so it made me think about all those stories you write. A lot of them have similar situations in them so I got curious if you liked things like that, is all."

"Hey, it is a sexy web site. They have all sorts of nutty stories, I think most of them are made up and real people don't even do things like that."

"I think a lot of them do, in private anyway. I was just wondering, everyone has a fantasy. You know, something that gets them excited? So I want to know about yours."

"I think it has to do with the husband being proud of his wife, that is part of it." I said.

"I think it has more to do with power and control, kind of like how men buy fancy cars, so they can show them off." Debs suggested.

"I don't drive a fancy hot rod."

"Your truck has 4 doors and the tires are nearly four feet tall, and the engine, how big IS that thing?"

"It's a diesel, a truck. It needs a big engine." I protested.

"Besides, you drive that Camaro." I added.

"So you like a big rig, that is showing off, power and control. It's an extension of your penis!" Debs grinned, ignoring my "Camaro" comment.

"Yea, maybe. But some of them want other men to have sex with their wives, that doesn't get me going one bit. I just don't understand that."

"Sometimes women like that, too. Being noticed, I mean." Debs told me.

"Is that why you wear that leotard to the gym?" I asked.

"I wear it because it is comfortable."

"Uh huh. You look nasty in that thing. Your nipples poke out and it shows your camel toe." I told her.

"Why thank you, honey. And you like that, right?" She grinned.

"I do, I suppose. It is sexy, and sex is sex and everyone likes it."

"Some women wear naughty clothes because their husbands are enjoying it."

"Now what do you mean by that?" I asked.

"Well, honey? You know, when Nikola comes by, I know she does...things? I like it that you are getting pleasure from it. I also happen to know Nikola never wears any underwear."

Nikola is the gal that comes over to the house a couple of times a month, she does massages, for both of us.

And I didn't know that she never wears any underwear.

"Most women would get mad, or jealous. You don't appear to." I told her.

"Nope, not me. It gets me hot." Debs was grinning now, and I know the signs in her very well.

We looked at each other and smiled, in about three seconds flat I had her in my lap and one nice fat nipple in my mouth.

+++

"See? Just talking about it, thinking got you all hot and bothered." She said later.

"Me? I was YOU that got all fussed up!"

Debs laughed and headed for the showers.

"So. Tell me who the woman was, you know? The one that her old man wants to flash guys." I gave Debs another probe later. Usually she will spill the beans if I press a little bit, she isn't supposed to, ethics and all of that but usually she will tell me.

So I know a lot of stuff about our little town.

"It was Jenny Taylor, from over on 12th street."

"The blond that looks like Bridget Bardow from behind? The one whose husband works at Chevrolet garage?"

"Yes, that one."

"Man! I should go over there and mow her lawn." I teased, which got me smacked in the arm.

+++

Nothing more was said for a couple of days, until Jack from next door invited us over. He had been down to the jetty and caught some fish, and was smoking them.

We decided to go over there.

Jack and Leese spend a lot of time naked, inside their swimming pool house now, usually.

Debs and I don't mind, and we swim naked also. That not only feels good, but when Sammi, their daughter is there, let's just say that is worth it.

Funny thing is, I would have expected Jack to get off on it when Debs took off her top, then her bottoms.

He did look her up and down, from then on he paid almost no attention.

Jack's wife Lisa spends a lot of time in her deck chair, one foot on each side of it like she doesn't care who sees her. Jack watches Lisa constantly.

No one could possibly miss the wad of flesh that woman has between her legs, one side hangs down a good inch further than the other and she spends a lot of time idly flicking the stuff.

Jack likes his wife, that much is completely clear.

Lisa also has that ever present bottle of wine, too.

A person really can get used to that, I guess.

Naked people, not the wine.

Anyway, we were all sitting in the deck chairs, eating what was some very good smoked Ling Cod.

Jack told me he uses more brown sugar and less salt, plus soy sauce. It created a kind of crust on the outside and the meat was chewy, yep, good.

"Do you guys ever go out and flash people in public?" Debra asked, right out of the clear blue sky.

I turned pink at that, but then my Debra never does pull any punches. If she wants to know something, she just asks.

"We used to when we were younger, we don't do that much any more." Lisa told her.

"Good fish!" I told Jack.

"Uh huh." He answered, we both had an ear cocked at what the women were talking about.

"So, how did you go about it?" Debs asked Lisa.

"Oh, a few times we flashed truckers out on the highway, Jack would ask me to take them out and show them to the drivers. Then we listened to them on the radio." She cackled at that, took a swig of her wine.

Next she picked up her oversize jugs and hefted them a couple of times, demonstrating what she would do. We all laughed at that.

"Back home we had a neighbor that used to watch me sun bathe, he even had a telescope in his upstairs room."

"You mean in the nude?" Debra asked.

"Not at first, I wore my bathing suit. Jack asked me to go topless, then one day I took off everything. That was hilarious, I could see him up there playing with himself when the Sun was just right." Leese was giggling at the memory.

"I went topless when we were on that cruise a few months ago. Other than coming over here and skinny dipping, that's all I have ever done." Debs said.

"You should try it some time, you have a great body." Jack piped up with.

"It is a kick in the ass to watch guys go all red faced and flustered when they suddenly see something they aren't supposed to see." Jack snorted at that.

"Danny likes to look at women." Debs told them, making my face red again.

"Really?" Lisa said. She opened her legs a bit more, hell, she was facing me already and I could already see just about everything.

Of course the talk and all of that caused me to begin to get a hard on, I was trying to force myself to think of changing the oil on my truck.

"Oh, look! Dan gets bigger!" Leese laughed, of course everyone looked at my tally whacker.

Which at that point took off by itself, of course it did.

"Oh, my!" Lisa said, grinning. I grabbed a towel to cover myself.

+++

We managed to escape not too long after.

"That was embarrassing." I told Debs. Hell, I am not particularly shy but that was a bit much.

"Oh, don't be silly. That happens to men, besides, you have a very nice penis." Debs told me with a grin.

I took a deep breath, went over to my laptop.

{"....aware of something, not understanding. Lights, patterns, no way to make sense of them, but they were beautiful.

He found himself feeling like he was part of the display in his thoughts, yet in his mind's eye he could sense that there was more.

As yet he could not quite understand what it was, then....."}

"What are you writing, honey?" Debs interrupted my train of thought.

"That sci fi story about the brain in the bottle." I told her.

"Oh. I thought maybe you were writing something sexy?"

"Maybe it will be, I don't know yet. My idea is that sex is in the mind, all of the nerve endings there would remain, even with no body, but how do I get to that?"

"You will figure it out, honey. Hey, want to go with me?"

"Where are you going?" I asked her.

"I need a new set of shoes to go with that dress I bought, I thought you might like to help me pick them out."

Now just why in the hell would I want to go shopping for women's shoes with my....?

OH!

I looked up at Debs, she had on a shorter skirt than she usually wears, and a pale colored blouse.

I could see her black bra right through it.

"Are you thinking what I think you are thinking?" I asked.

"I just wanted to give it a try. Talking to Jenny and then after we talked to Jack and Lisa, I am curious. So? Do you want to go?" She gave me a sexy smile.

"I wouldn't miss this for the world." I got up.

I had to put the passenger seat all the way down and back to get into her Camaro, even at that it felt like another three inches for my legs would sure help. The back seat was impossible, they might as well have not bothered to even have a back seat.

No human being on Earth could sit back there with the front seat all the way back, it would have their legs squashed.

Debs started the engine, it kind of growls quietly. It sounded a bit wimpy compared to my truck with it's 3 inch dual exhaust pipes.

"So. Where are we going? Walmart? Safeway? Maybe down to old man Vidalis's store?" I asked.

"Becky's." Debs didn't look my way.

"You really are going to flash your panties at someone in Becky's shoe store?" I asked her.