No one under eighteen years old in sexual situations. Any similarity to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental. This is fantasy, not reality. Please keep comments nice
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Sometimes it is better to be lucky than good. When I married Michelle, we moved into a lovely new home, one that was way too big for us. We had, at that time, thought it was just right for two children and us. It even had an in-law cottage for visiting in-laws. Who could have predicted that my folks would pass away in a horrible air crash a year before the wedding?
The entire family was devastated by this terrible tragedy. It almost seemed like they knew that something was going to happen because they had done meticulous estate planning concerning their deaths. They knew something I did not know. Damned if I knew HOW they knew! Perhaps they had psychic powers that they never told me about.
So, in essence, my folks would pass on the old family home and family fortune, but they had a brilliant and visionary lawyer who had the entire thing wrapped up in a very tight trust fund.
I'm not sure about the reasons why they did this. One explanation was to bypass probate and tax ramifications. The other crazy idea was they did not remotely trust my (then) girlfriend Michelle, who would thus eventually become my wife. For some reason, they knew she was bad news, and they were determined to protect me as best they could. The funds were protected from any type of divorce action because, in essence... I had not yet actually received any money! So a lawyer or an ex-spouse could go pound sand. My parents and their lawyer were brilliant.
I say thank you for having such foresight, mom and dad. You were right about her. I was so wrong. Love is so blind and stupid as shit too. How could I have missed all the obvious signs? Not because I was stupid... More because I was too trusting and naive.
I mean, you love and trust your spouse, right?
Ironically, it was her parents that pushed for an ironclad prenuptial agreement for us before we wed. I didn't think that we needed one, but her father was into stocks and bonds, and had a lot more money to lose than my tiny business and my folks' modestly successful business. I told him and his wife that I had no intention of taking one thin dime from them, either in the regular course of the marriage or through a divorce if that should ever happen. I made the simple suggestion that for whatever reason we ever break up, what was ours stays ours, what we earned during the union we split 50/50. Totally fair. He made the stipulation that if cheating were involved, then the cheater would only receive 20 percent, and the cheated-on partner would get the lion's share of 80 percent. I suppose he thought that there was a high possibility of me cheating on his daughter.
I did not think it would ever apply to us, so I signed off on the prenup, as did my fiancee. Thank you, my kind and loving father-in-law! The lovely man saved me tens of thousands of dollars! Did not do so much for his cheating daughter, though! But then, she kinda made her own bed; let the cheating bitch lay in it!
Well, after five years of wedded bliss, or perhaps it would have been better to say the illusion of that state of matrimony, things started to unravel. I was concerned that we were still childless after all this time. We wanted children, or at least I wanted them. She said she did, but not with the conviction one would expect from a wife who wanted to be a mom. The fact is that no matter how much we fucked, took her temperature, and followed the fertility books suggestions... She was not pregnant. We should have had five kids by now!
On the plus side however, she never complained about all the sex to make a baby. Not once! Hell, I fucked her sometimes four or five times a day, without a trace of complaints, only smiles! She did not mind having lots and lots of wonderful orgasms every day.
So I went to seek out medical help. Checking out my little swimmers took a single visit. If the numbers are to be believed, I had enough sperm to repopulate half the world. I had the test late in the afternoon, so my sperm count should have been at it's lowest (we had sex four times throughout the day) and we had sex about an hour before that, so my numbers should have been at their lowest, but my numbers and quality of sperm were still quite high! In other words, I was pretty much normal, perhaps in the top three percent of men in terms of sperm count and density. My motility was good as well. The doctor mentioned that I would be a great sperm DONER as my sperm looked quite healthy, and I was consistently high in count... I don't think I have any issues with becoming a dad. So we had half the problem licked right away.
The nurse actually made a critical suggestion that the doctor had not thought of. I was going to have my wife Michelle come in for the requisite fertility tests, but the nurse pointed out that certain types of medication could greatly affect a woman's fertility. She said to simply check out the medicines in my wife's medicine cabinet! Quick, easy, and painless! Take photos of everything for the doctor to check out.
Michelle was an absolutely terrible hypochondriac. She loved drugs of any and all persuasion. She swallowed vitamins by the fistful. She should start a disease of the month club! She may wind up as a medical professional from her first hand study of every single disease known to mankind! She always thought she was coming down with this disease, or that horrible condition. In truth, she was as healthy as a horse.
Me? I got tons of headaches listening to all that bullshit. I didn't rain on her parade, I just took her to the doctor a lot. I took her so many times, the nurses and I were on a first name basis, and I knew their husband's names and their children too. I spent way too much time at that doctor's office.
The doc pulled me aside and we chatted about my wife's imaginary affliction du jour, and he asked me if I was aware of it. I told him I was, but short of me going to med school, I didn't see what I could do about it. I told him my only worry was what if she really picked up some kind of bug... if we treated her like the hypochondriac she is, she might really be sick! He pointed out that she had forty-five visits and as near as he could tell, she was as healthy as a horse. She got it into her head somehow that she was sick. He suggested I keep some B vitamins available and give her one or two when she got sick. See if she recovered. He called it the power of suggestion, and it might help her, or maybe not, but it might cut down on her office visits.