Demo Day 02

I went down and through the lobby and Jackie was standing in front of Dunkin' and a guy was talking to her and I heard her say, "No, thank you. No, here's my husband now."

I walked up and said, "Hi honey, what's going on?"

The guy looked at me, said "Okay" and walked off. Jackie said, "He wanted to take me to dinner or drinks."

"Well, you are a really attractive woman Jackie."

I saw a tear in her eye and she said, "Can we go eat somewhere quiet please? I need to apologize and see if I can get you back home please Phil."

"Sure thing."

"You'll come home?" She had hope in her voice and her eyes.

"We can go eat somewhere quiet, no problem."

"Oh...I thought you meant you'd come home."

"That is still open for discussion."

"I still have the 'Articles of Agreement' I didn't rip them up. I initialed and signed it in front of a notary. Please could you come home? I'm so depressed that you left and it's all my fault. I was so stupid letting..."

"Let's go eat, I didn't have lunch. We'll talk." I took a step in the direction and Jackie stepped next to me and slid her arm inside mine. It had been a while since she had done that and it felt very comfortable and somewhat reassuring. I was hopeful we could get back on the right track together.

I would have liked to go to Subway but I decided I'd eat lunch there tomorrow. We went to this small bar and grill with a bunch of tables and I asked the hostess for a booth in a corner and we were seated. Jackie ordered water with lemon and I ordered a gin and tonic with lime. I saw an eyebrow go up and I said, "It's been that kid of week Jackie."

The drinks came and we ordered burgers and fries and I asked, "About Burger King, did Jeff follow you or did you call him?" She didn't answer and I waited a few more seconds and said, "I can ask his wife to check his phone for your number and see if it's in his call log if you'd rather I went that way."

"He's married? He told me he was divorced."

"And that was okay for you to kiss him and let him feel your breast?" She lowered her eyes to the table. "Well, I think our discussion is done after we eat because obviously you were a very willing participant and I'll never trust you again."

"Phil please, I got caught up in his whole nice guy thing and I was just...not thinking at all."

"So have you gotten caught up with anyone else over the years Jackie?"

"No, I've never let my guard down before and I don't know why I did this week. I'm so sorry I ever went over to the house to see the place. Please, forgive me. If you come home to me it will never happen again. Please give me the chance to prove to you that it will never happen again. I'll abide by your articles for the rest of my life if you'll come home to me please."

The burgers came and the talk ended while I ate. Once I took a bite I had to eat because I didn't realize how hungry I was. My stomach had been tied in knots all day. Jackie took a few bites and said, "I'm not very hungry Phil. Would you want the other half of mine?"

"No, this will do, I don't want to overstuff myself. So you're willing to live by the Articles for the rest of your life and if I suspect you're messing up again it's over? Is that what you're saying?"

"Yes honey. I will remain on guard forever if you come home to me."

"You never answered my question about Burger King."

Jackie sighed, "I called and told him I was on my way to the bank. I should have realized that you were very hurt on Wednesday when you asked about my flushed face. I am so very, very sorry. What can I do to start you feeling better about yourself and us? I love you so much and I don't know what got into me."

"Would you go to a therapist to talk about it?"

"Yes. Yes we can go to therapy."

"No Jackie, I want you to go to therapy and figure out why you did this. I don't need to talk about therapy because I haven't done anything to jeopardize our marriage. I want you to go and figure out why you did this."

"Okay, I'll go see someone to figure it out. I would like to include you..."

"I'll be there in spirit in your thoughts."

"What if the therapist wants to talk to you?"

"Have him call me. And we'll discuss if I need to go or not."

"I don't think I want a male therapist."

"That is up to you. Now that you've been honest about Burger King how do you feel Jackie?"

"A bit better, I'm glad I told you what you wanted to know. I thought you'd be more upset."

"It's all in the same bucket Jacs. I'm just going to have to deal with it." She smiled when I used her pet name. "Is there anything else I should know? Anything you want to tell me because I want it all out in the open now. I don't want to hear that something else happened and you didn't tell me about that. It would be like another lie if you hid anything Jacs." I kept my face as neutral as I could.

"Well, um...I sort of glossed over Thursday morning a bit. I didn't want to upset you more than I already had...so I kind of left some stuff out."

"Tell me now Jacs or if it comes to light later it may finish the job completely. Now, right now is your chance to be totally honest and I will abide by the Articles and therapy."

She took a couple deep breaths and I saw fear in her eyes. "Well, Thursday morning we uh, well..."

"Just say it Jacs. Just spit it out because obviously you know I'm going to hate it but the offer still stands. Tell me now or I pay the check and walk away for good."

She closed her eyes and whispered, "When Jeff put his hand under my shirt and touched my side...I snapped back to reality. But that's as far as it went. I'm so sorry Phil, I knew I made a mistake but I couldn't stop myself until then. I'm so very sorry." She opened her eyes and tears were flowing down her cheeks. She had confirmed what I had suspected but needed to hear from her.

"And is that it? Is there anything else? Did you get to...?"

"NO. No, that was as far as it went and I couldn't go further. I felt so guilty I had gone that far. I'm such a bad person, I'm sorry."

I took a deep breath and said, "I'll give you a definite answer if I'm coming home by Sunday. I need to think about all this. If I feel that you are holding anything back from me..."

"There isn't any other bad news, honest Phil. Please, please come home to me and I'll do whatever you want. I'll find a therapist tomorrow and make an appointment for as soon as possible to start resolving why I did this. Please come home to me."

The waitress had walked toward our table twice, saw that we were in a very intense conversation and turned away. The third time she started to approach I waved her over and asked for the check. She pulled it out of her apron, "I'll take this when you're ready, thank you."

I glanced at it and pulled 3 $20s out of my pocket and said, "Keep the change and thanks for your considerate attention to us, have a good night."

She smiled widely, "Come back any time, thank you." The bill had been $43.08 and the tip was because she was smart and sensitive enough to see we were in a very emotional conversation. I walked Jackie to her car and she looked at me when I opened the door for her, "Thank you Phil. I'm so very sorry I did this. Please consider giving me a second chance. I promise I'll never make a mistake again, please." She reached for me and I took a half-step back and the sadness in her eyes was killing me but I had to make sure she understood where we were and what the stakes were for us both.

She sat down in the driver's seat and as I started to close the door, "I love you Phil and I'm so sorry I screwed up. Please forgive me this one time, please."

"I love you too Jackie but I need to examine everything about our relationship..."

"Isn't that what counseling is for? Could we consider marriage counseling?"

"If I decide I want to move forward with you it's a strong possibility that we'd do that." I saw a flash of heat in her face and eyes.

"IF YOU WAJT to move forward with me?"

"Yes, Jackie, IF because I have doubts and fears now. I'm afraid you'll go see Jeff again and you'll sneak around to see him somewhere."

"I NEVER WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN!! Please Phil please forgive me."

"We'll talk on Sunday, I promise you that." I closed the door, heard her lock it and turned and walked away without looking back. I heard the engine start and she started backing out of her parking spot.

I walked back to the bar and sat at the bar with another gin and tonic with lime. I was sitting there thinking when the waitress walked up and asked, "So how was your date? It looked intense."

I looked at her, she was smiling and I said, "That was my wife who started an affair which I confronted her about and decisions need to be made. She was pleading her case for me to forgive her and go back home but I don't know that I can trust her now."

"Well, she looked thoroughly upset and she was crying quite a bit..."

"Yeah and she admitted to lies on top of lies to try to minimize what happened so how can I believe anything she says now? She said he never touched her and now she says his hand was under her shirt and she stopped him there but if I press harder will she say her shirt and bra were off? I don't know what I can believe from her now."

"I see your point but in her defense, did she try to minimize the story to try to save your relationship? So she wouldn't hurt you so badly?"

"I don't know. When I confronted her and she admitted to kissing him and letting him feel her breast through her shirt I just wanted to die. I never thought she'd let another man go that far, kissing her never mind feeling her anywhere."

"SO you've never..."

"No, I haven't kissed another woman never mind feel someone's breast."

"That wasn't going to be my question. You've never looked at another woman and wanted to 'interact' with her in a sexual way?"

I paused for a moment and the waitress, Kelly arched an eyebrow. "Well, so tell me who and what happened?"

"A woman I worked with, Kathy was extremely outgoing and very attractive and I had considered making a move on her because she teased andflirted with me constantly. But I never touched her, never kissed her and I made sure that if we were alone in the same room the door was open the whole time."

Kelly stared at me for several seconds, "SO you're saying you were very attracted to this Kathy and yet you did absolutely nothing about it?"

"That's right. I was married to Jackie and I love her so much that I'd die to save her. But I'd never disrespect her by approaching another woman."

"You are a freakin' saint. You should have a halo around your head. I don't know another man that would resist the temptation you are talking about."

"Like I said, I love Jackie to the point of dying for her."

"Well, do you think she's dying inside right now? Don't you think she's hurting as badly if not worse than you? If you'd die for her then forgive her mistake and work it out so you can both be together again. Don't you think she's worth your forgiveness?"

I hung my head and said, "I don't know that I'm worth her forgiveness now. Now that you made me see it from a woman's perspective."

"You are worth it, considering how I saw her looking at you. She loves you too. Go call her before she does something dumber and work it out." I thanked Kelly and went to pay for my drink and she said, "This one's on the house, your tip was way too generous. I thought you came back to make time with me at first. But obviously you just wanted to drown your sorrows. Go save the relationship you should save." I thanked her and left.

I went back to the room and I was about to call Jackie when I looked at the tablet. Jackie was home; her phone and then I looked at the other trackers. One of Jeff's trackers was at the house as well. I was furious.

I called a cab and I was at the house in 15 minutes. I went in through the garage and then the laundry room and into the kitchen. Jackie was sitting at the table talking to Donna! I walked in, my face was set in a mask of anger and it took me several seconds to calm down. Jackie had jumped up when I came in with a look of surprise and then...nothing. Her face was blank.

I relaxed and said, "Sorry, I saw a car in the driveway and thought Jeff was here and I was ready for a fight. Sorry, I'm very sorry."

Jackie walked over and put her arms around my waist and said, "Its okay. You didn't know what you were walking into. Donna has told me about Jeff and his constant cheating on her and she has asked me to testify in court since she wants to divorce him. I'd be willing to help her if it's okay with you."

I looked at Donna and asked, "Could Jeff kissing and feeling her breast be enough grounds for divorce?"

Donna looked at me with a strange expression and Jackie said, "Phil, I didn't tell you everything that happened, I didn't want to crush you. I didn't want to break your heart and the chance of us fixing..."

"YOU HAD SEX WITH HIM JACKIE?"

She fell to the floor and wrapped her arms around my legs and moaned, "I'm so sorry Phil. I was crazy; I don't know why I did it."

I reached down and peeled her arms from around my legs and took 2 steps back. "Phil please I'm so, so sorry."

"Jackie, I told you at dinner to tell me everything and still then you lied to me. I told you it was the time to come clean and we'd work it out but you still lied to me. I can never believe you again. I was coming home tonight to tell you that we'd get my stuff and bring it back but this news just changed that plan."

"OH NO PHIL PLEASE DON'T SAY THAT. I'm so sorry. I was afraid to tell you the whole thing that you'd never want to see me again. PLEASE PHIL PLEASE FORGIVE ME THIS ONE MISTAKE PLEASE."

"You had your chance at dinner Jackie. I told you then; it hurt when you said you let his hand under your shirt and then stopped him. Now obviously you didn't stop him but you lied to me AGAIN. The lies will never stop coming from your mouth so we're done. I will move my stuff somewhere."

"I thought you had already signed for an apartment Phil."

"NO, I was at a hotel in town hoping we could patch this up. I told you that I'd forgive you if you told me everything at dinner. If you had only trusted me as much as I've trusted you over the years so I didn't want to commit to a lease but now, this news is the end." I walked around her, still sobbing on the floor and went out the front door. I was going to walk back to town, it's only 3 miles.

Donna came out before I got to the end of the driveway and called me. I stopped and turned around. She came walking up to me and said, "Phil, I know you love her but please re-consider. Jeff can charm the skin off a snake if he puts his mind to it. He's very smooth and that's how I made the mistake of marrying him. Please re-consider. She's made a mistake and she loves you. She didn't want to come to court so you'd never find out what she did. But please, go back and talk to her and try to understand..."

"Donna, if she had told me at dinner that she had slept with him I'd have been devastated but I was prepared for that possibility. She's a wildcat in bed once you get her started and I expected to hear that she slept with him. If she had only admitted it we'd be in a better place. She didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth, how can I trust her now?"

"She didn't tell you because she loves you and didn't want to hurt you any further. If I had an idea you were coming here tonight I wouldn't have approached her tonight. Please come back in, sit down and talk to her. I don't want to see her do something to herself because she is depressed about her mistake. Please Phil if you love her at all come back inside."

I couldn't fight that argument because even though I was devastated by the news I wasn't really surprised by it. "Donna, did you mention the trackers to her?"

"No, I need to keep an eye on Jeff and if I had mentioned them to Jackie, well you never know what she might do about it."

"Okay, because I need to keep an eye on her for now to see what she's up to when she's away from here." I followed Donna back inside. Jackie was at the table sobbing into her hands. Donna entered first and asked, "Phil which chair do you want?" Jackie's head snapped up and she looked at me with the saddest eyes I have ever seen. I took the chair at the far end of the table and sat there.

Donna "Jackie, I persuaded Phil to come back inside. Please tell him the whole story now and don't leave anything out, the whole thing, truth or lose him forever."

"Phil, I'm so sorry..."

"Jackie, you've said that over and over. I have asked you to tell me the truth so now, everything all of it or I walk away forever. This is it, make or break time Jackie. It is up to you. I told Donna what I expected to hear at dinner but didn't until I came here."

Jackie sighed and looked at me, "I had sex with Jeff twice, Wednesday and Thursday morning. I'm ashamed to admit it but I did it for some reason I can't explain to myself even. I love you and you're a wonderful husband so I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry I did it and I thought I might get away with it but my conscience was eating at me. I don't know why I went back on Thursday but it was to tell him not to bother me again and we ended up having sex before I called you that I was coming home. Please believe me that I've never done anything like this before and I don't know why I did it now. I am going to go see a therapist to figure it out because I don't want it happening again."

Donna "Where was his helper?"

"When I got there Jeff gave him $20 to go get coffees and told him to take a half-hour break. The guy looked at me and smiled like he knew what was going to happen. I think Jeff's done it before."

I just sat there, feeling numb and defeated. I just hung my head and cried. Jackie called me, "Phil...Phil, please look at me. I'm so sorry I was so stupid to get tangled up with him. I was interested in the project and he pulled me right in with my interest and I was so impressed that I let my guard down. I'm so sorry, please forgive me." I just nodded my head. "Phil, please look at me. It isn't anything against you please. I just let him get to me with the reno project and he took advantage of my interest."

"Yeah Jackie, I understand. I forgive you. Good bye." I got up and started to walk to the front door. She grabbed me and said, "Please Phil I can't lose you, please. Can we get through this and I'll do anything to make this up to you."

"I don't know what you can do Jackie. I mean you just sort of ripped my heart out a little piece at a time. I don't think there's anything left. I don't know what to do now."

"Please Phil don't leave me."

"I'm not the one who left Jackie. You are the one that went to another man; I didn't go looking for another woman. You left me."

"Phil, I'm sorry I said that wrong. I know I made the mistake."

"I'm very tired Jackie. I'm gong to the guest room to sleep. Talk to you later Donna, good night." I walked to the guest room, stripped to underwear and got in bed. I slept the sleep of the thoroughly depressed. I woke up with Jackie next to me. I didn't even wake when she got in bed whenever that had been.

I got out of bed and went to the bathroom then headed to the kitchen for coffee. Jackie came out several minutes later and said 'hi' and I asked, "Why did you get in bed with me?"

"I wanted...I needed to hold you because I don't want to lose you because of my mistake. I researched therapists last night and I'm making an appointment to go in as soon as possible. Please Phil give me a chance to correct this."

"You know I went back to the bar last night after I walked you to the car and sat down. The waitress came over and started talking to me and pleading your case after I outlined the situation. She assumed I had 'interacted' as she put it with another woman during our marriage. When I told her I had no desire to 'interact' with another woman she told me I was a saint. I told her I loved and respected you too much to ever cheat on you. It doesn't seem to be reciprocal though Jackie. The waitress asked if I had ever been attracted to another woman and I said yes but I never did a thing about it. She told me I was one in a million. She asked if I loved you and I said I'd lay down my life for you and then she asked why wouldn't I forgive you if I'd die for you.