Flash story at best. Written a while back about my favorite crazy lady. I have it on good authority that is not worth reading. I was bored. You were warned. No sex.
This Story has been edited to fix some flaws
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"Honestly, Geena." Denise sipped her coffee, "Greg is going ballistic for no reason. It was just a couple kisses at the party."
"And you kissed Tom from Accounting?" Geena said in disbelief appalled both by her actions and her choice. The two were sharing girl talk at a local Cosi', a Columbus coffee chain. There had been one of those corporate 'stress relieving' parties and Denise had been a bit too free with the grape, to hear her tell her story.
There was an audible snicker from the table next to them.
"Excuse me. This is a private conversation." Denise said pointedly to the brunette sitting there, waiting for her companion.
"Then you should keep your voices down. But I hope you don't mind if I listen in, because you're hilarious." she returned. Her eyes were bright and a smile crossed her face.
"What?" Denise said incredulously.
The brunnette waved her hand at the two of them. "But really, I actually have some questions for your friend Geena. Tell me, is Greg...it's Greg, right, is Greg cute? Does he earn good cash? How's his personality?" She pulled out a small notebook and a pen from her heavy purse.
"Excuse me?!?" Denise sputtered "Why the hell are you asking that and why are you asking her? Who are you?"
"Where are my manners? I'm Andrea. Well, since you don't value him anymore, I figure I'd scope him out and see if he was any kind of catch." the eavesdropper asked simply. "And since you're already looking for someone else, I figure she might give me more objective answers. If you're already cheating on him, you probably have an artificially low opinion of him."
"I am NOT cheating! It was kissing! And who the hell are you to try to steal my man?" Denise almost screamed.
Andrea smiled. "Oh, I'm not stealing him; you're throwing him away. But it's not for me. I'm Taken. I have a couple girlfriends who are looking for someone good and it's hard to find decent men who aren't afraid of commitment." At this point, a plump blonde joined the brunette, her hands filled with two beverages.
"Are you nuts?" Denise asked, nonplussed.
"I don't see how that's relevant." Andrea furrowed her brow. "The important thing is I'm not
stupid.
So...how is he with kids?" Andrea continued with Geena.
Geena was caught between amusement and outrage at her friend's predicament. "He's great with kids." Andrea dutifully wrote it down.
"Geena!" Denise whirled back to Andrea. "How would you like it if I tried to steal
your
man?" Denise threw at Andrea. Cinnamon, the blonde, with great presence of mind and snakelike reflexes, grabbed Andrea's purse and clutched it to her bosom.
Andrea gave her friend a long suffering look. "
Really
? You think I'm threatened by
that
?" She gestured at Geena. Geena bristled at the implied insult. Andrea shook her head and started holding up fingers. "One, he doesn't normally favor blondes, particularly fake ones. Two, you are nowhere near good enough for him." Cinnamon made a small gagging sound, which garnered a look from Andrea. "Three, unlike you, I
appreciate
what I have and I'm not throwing him away by playing tonsil hockey with
Tom
from Accounting." Andrea got this strange little look. "And fourth, if you had a snowballs chance in Hell, I know exactly how to deal..."
"Andrea!" Cinnamon corrected quickly. "What's going on here?" Cinnamon tried smiling. Smiles brightened everyone's day. Things needed calming down. Her friend Andrea was not the most stable of individuals which was as charitable as saying that the Titanic was an unfortunate boating accident.
"Oh nothing. This woman doesn't love her husband anymore and I was seeing if he'd be a good match for some friends of mine since he has low standards." Andrea explained to her friend.
"HEY! And you're one to talk about fake hair color." Denise shot at the brunette.
Andrea reached up and ran her fingers through her long dyed locks. "My husband
likes
black hair. So it's black." she said as if explaining the facts of life to a child. "Do you do
anything
