Crossing the Rubicon

"Larry, what do you think of Marilyn?"

I stopped my cleaning up from the cocktail party and looked at my wife. "Chip's wife? Or Monroe?"

Alice stuck her tongue out at me and said "Smart ass."

I laughed. Alice could always make me laugh. "She's fine. Plays a heckuva game of hearts."

"Do you think she's ... attractive?"

I waggled my finger at Alice. "Oooh no, I know this game. If I say yes, you'll get mad at me. If I say no, you won't believe me and will start grilling me about it. No way Alice." I wiped the last of the crumbs from the coffee table and walked towards the kitchen. "Not gonna play that tonight. I'm a little buzzed, relaxed and happy. I just want to go to bed"

Alice followed me. "Larry, I'm not playing you here. I really want to know."

I stepped on the foot pedal of the trashcan, dropped the last of the mess from the party in and let it drop shut with a small clang.

"What is it Alice? What's going on?" I was getting annoyed.

"Just tell me ..."

"WHAT??"

"Whether or not you think Marilyn is attractive?"

"Fine. She's attractive ... okay? Are we done here?" I turned and started loading glasses into the dishwasher.

"How?"

My shoulders slumped. Without turning around I said "How what?"

"How is she attractive?"

I spun around. "For god's sake Alice. What the hell are you expecting me to say here? Yes, Marilyn is an attractive woman. She's smart, has a nice figure that she keeps fit, and she has a pretty face. Now can we PLEASE finish cleaning up and go to bed?" I turned back to the dishwasher.

"Chip's quite good looking."

I froze. Every warning klaxon in my mind started going off. I clenched my jaw for a moment and counted to 10 before I turned around slowly to face my wife. "Alice, we've discussed this. I have no interest in swinging."

Alice had started bringing up the subject of swinging soon after we retired and moved to Florida. She was quick to point out every upside down pineapple she saw on a house, car, golf cart or polo shirt. She started talking about it while we would make love, using "fantasy play" as an excuse. She even talked me into watching swingers porn on her ipad with her in bed one night while she tried to give me a hand job. "Doesn't that look hot Larry? Wouldn't that turn you on?" I didn't get hard and she gave up. But later that night I woke to find her fingering herself next to me in bed, her face lit by the ipad.

Alice squared her shoulders and raised her chin. "Larry, I'm bored .... sexually." She saw my face start to break, but went on. "You're a great husband, a wonderful father and grandfather and a generous and tender lover. But you're the only man I've ever touched." Her chin was starting to quiver. "I don't have a lot of time left where another man would be interested in me sexually. I need to experience that. And I'm going to."

I was numb. I couldn't fathom what I was hearing from my wife of 37 years. "Alice ... are you .... leaving me?"

She rushed to me and threw her arms around my paralyzed body. "No ... no no no!! Larry, I love you! More than you can possibly know."

I pushed her away from me, gently but firmly. "THEN FOR GOD'S SAKE WHY ALICE?? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO US?!?"

I expected her to cry, to admit or confess to something, to break down in some way. But she just got that familiar, patient smile. "Larry, I'm not doing anything to us. Don't you understand? I need this for me, to feel ... I don't know ... sexy and desired again. It's important to me. It doesn't mean I don't love you or don't care about our marriage. Why can't you understand that?"

I turned my back on her, gripping the counter. "You don't think I look at other women, Alice? You think I don't fantasize about some young hot woman being attracted to me? Making me feel virile and relevant?"

"Oh I know you do Larry. I've looked at your browser history."

The blood drained from my face. Tears started to burn my eyes. "I'm sorry my love. I'm so sorry."

She came up behind me and pressed herself against me. She put her arms around me and said "Larry ... Larry. It's okay. Don't you see? Deep down you feel the same way I do!"

I was weeping, shaking my head. "No. No I don't. Me masturbating to some porn on the internet is NOT the same as doing something about it."

She turned me around and wiped my tears, kissing my cheeks. "I'm sorry this is hurting you. But if I don't do this, I'll end up resenting you and our marriage. And I don't want that my love. And I don't want to fall in love with anyone else either. I just want .... sex .... with someone besides you."

"So you are going to do this. You're going to make me a cuckold?"

She smiled, which somehow hurt me more. "If you'd be willing to swing, you wouldn't be a cuckold."

I sobbed. "I can't Alice. I can't watch you be with someone else. It would kill me."

"I know baby, I know." she kissed me "That's what I told Chip."

"SONOFABITCH!! WHAT?? I'LL FUCKING KILL HIM!"

Alice slapped me, hard. "YOU WON'T DO ANYTHING TO CHIP! I APPROACHED HIM!!"

Her slap and what she just said struck me dumb with shock.

She had a hard look on her face. "That's right. I ... INITIATED THIS!!"

I stood there in silence, waiting for the next bombshell.

"Larry, Chip and Marilyn and I have been talking about this for months. They've done a little swinging. They like us and feel safe with us. But you've pushed this away for too long. I kept waiting for you to come around and you just wouldn't. So ... I'm going out this Thursday night with Chip. I probably won't be home till morning."

My voice was hoarse. "With Chip.. and Marilyn?"

She shook her head. "No, I have no interest in being with a woman, you know that. I would enjoy watching you with another woman but since you won't have it, it will just be Chip and I. And yes, I plan on fucking him." She turned on her heel, went to the bedroom, slammed and locked the door.

Part 2

I sat on the side of our bed and watched my wife get dressed for her date. Alice still had a dynamite body. Even after 3 children. She worked very hard at staying fit and trim. She ate well, exercised and took advantage of every health regimine and supplement she could. Her breasts were high, firm and well shaped thanks to breast augmentation surgery she insisted on before I retired. She wasn't wearing a bra and apparently had no plans to. Her legs were shapely and she had a perfect heart shaped ass. And at that moment she was pulling a pair of lace panties over that ass.

I stared at her face in the mirrored closet door. She looked at me. "Larry, don't you think it would be easier on you if you didn't watch this?"

I shook my head. I had been crying all day.

She sighed and sat on the bed next to me. She pulled on a pair of silk thigh highs.

"Alice ... please ..."

She turned to me and took my hands. "Larry, I'm not going to argue about this. I told you just this morning it wasn't too late to change your mind. Marilyn likes you, finds you attractive and would be happy to be with you. You could decide right now to take a shower, dress, and come with me." She sighed "But you aren't going to." She stood up and pulled a tight fitting, low cut black sheath dress over her head. She reached around and zipped herself in, the slit up the back center revealing the tops of the stockings where they met her well toned thighs. She slipped into her high heels and stood in front of me. She put her arms around my head, cradling it to her. I could smell her perfume. My heart was breaking. She pressed her lips to the top of my head and said "I love you Larry." And she walked out. I didn't say a word.

Part 2

The sun went down. I sat on the edge of the bed and let the house grow dark around me. I couldn't cry anymore. I was exhausted and devastated by the knowledge that my wife, my beloved Alice, was out there with another man and fully intended to have sex with him.

I considered getting blackout drunk. I tried to get angry. I thought about packing my things, moving out and filing for divorce. I fantasized about grabbing my 1 iron and heading out to find them. I wished I could rage, smash things around me, destroy our home the way Alice was destroying me. But all I felt was overwhelming despair.

I heard a knock at the door. My heart did a flip. Was it Alice?? Had she had a change of heart? I wiped my face with the heels of my hands and ran to the door, throwing it open. It wasn't Alice. Of course it wasn't her. Why would she knock at her own door?

Instead, it was Marilyn. I stared at her in silence, then started to push the door closed. She put out a hand to stop the door. I lacked the energy to fight her. I just turned around, walked into the living room and sat down on the sofa.

"What do you want, Marilyn?"

"Larry, Alice was worried about you, so she texted me and asked me to come over to check on you. May I come in please.?"

I waved a gesture that could be interpreted as "Come in." or "Whatever." She chose the former. She walked over to the couch and sat down. Not right next to me but a cushion away. She didn't say anything.

"You know what our spouses are doing tonight, right?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Why are you here Marilyn?"

"Like I said, Alice ..."

I jumped up "BULLSHIT!! If Alice cared so fucking much about me she wouldn't be out with your husband tonight!"

She sighed. "Larry, please calm down and listen for a moment."

I stood there, my fists curled at my sides, breathing heavily.

"Larry, if Alice really didn't care about you, then why was she honest about what she's doing? She could easily have gone behind your back."

"I don't know!!" I started to pace in the darkened living room. "Maybe she's mad at me about something and wants to hurt me. Maybe she's gone crazy. Or maybe ..." I turned and glared at Marilyn and said through gritted teeth "... maybe your FUCKING husband seduced my wife!"

Marilyn's mouth twitched a little. I thought she was going to cry, and I was hoping she would. I wanted someone else to be as hurt as I was tonight. Instead, she brought her hand up to her mouth and started to laugh.

"What the FUCK is so funny Marilyn."

She gulped down a laugh and smiled up at me, shaking her head. "Larry, you are a dear, but completely clueless. I love Chip with all my heart. But honestly, when it comes to seduction, he's an absolute clod. A big, loveable charming buffoon." She took a deep breath and said "Larry, please come sit down. I want to talk to you."

I don't know why, but I did. Marylin reached out and took my hand. Part of me wanted to pull it away, and other part of me wanted to bury my head on her shoulder and weep.

"Larry, shortly after Chip and I married, I had an affair. I didn't love the man, or even particularly care about him. I certainly had no intention of leaving Chip for him. It was purely about sex. I was a virgin when I married Chip, and about 3 years into the marriage, for reasons I can't possibly explain, I was terrified by the prospect of never experiencing sex with anyone but Chip for the rest of my life. It's not that Chip isn't a wonderful lover, he is. He's tender, caring, generous and creative. But even the best meal in the world would get boring if you had to eat it every night."

I snorted sardonically.

Marilyn chuckled "You're right, bad analogy. Anyway, I picked out a man at my office that I found attractive, laid out a plan and seduced him. He was single so I wasn't a homewrecker. It went on for a couple of months but soon the stress of lying to Chip got to me and I tried to break it off. The man went crazy and showed up at our house."

"Shit."

"Shit is right. I thought Chip was going to kill him, and he might have if I hadn't been there."

I nodded "Probably, isn't Chip ex-military?"

"Mmm hmmm, Airborne. That wouldn't have ended well. Anyway, Chip scared him away. Then he lit into me. Oh he didn't hit me, but he sure used some hurtful language. I thought for sure he was going to leave me. But I let him blow himself out as I sat there and cried, trying to tell him that what I had done didn't have anything to do with him or how I felt about him, it was just something I needed. Finally he stopped, sat down next to me and said 'Why did you lie about it?'. Well, that pulled me up short. He took me by my hands, kissed me and said 'Em, I don't care that you fucked him. What hurts are the lies. No more lying.... Okay?' "

I was stunned. I couldn't understand how a husband wouldn't care that his wife was with another man, and I said so.

"Larry, when you masturbate to porn and keep it secret, are you being faithful?"

"Oh for FUCKS sake! She TOLD you!?!?"

"Yes, and so what. Chip does it too. Hell, sometimes we do it together just for fun. That's not the point. You masturbating to porn doesn't have anything to do with how you feel about Alice. She told us that she knows that. She's just sad that you HIDE it from her. That you don't trust her and your relationship with her enough to be able to take care of your needs and be honest about it."

I buried my face in my hands "Oh God Marilyn, what am I going to do?"

I felt her hand on my shoulder "What do you want to do Larry?"

"Cry, get drunk, drive my golf cart into a lake."

She laughed, "Well, that's one set of options." Then, she kissed my neck.

I stiffened and pulled away, then turned to face her "Jesus, Marilyn, what the hell??"

"Larry, you know Alice, Chip and I wanted us all to experience something together." She was unbuttoning her top. I wasn't lying when I told Alice that I thought Marilyn was attractive. She was tall and slim with breasts smaller than Alice's, but something about how she was put together screamed sexuality. "But since you aren't comfortable with that, I thought maybe while Chip and Alice ... are ... you know ... that you and I could have some fun together. You know Alice really wanted to watch you fuck me while Chip fucked her. But since she can't watch it, maybe you could tell her about it after? Would you enjoy that Larry? Telling Alice about what it felt like to fuck me? And hear about what she felt with Chip?"

"Marilyn ... I ..."

Her top was off and she was unhooking her bra. "Larry, darling. I've seen how you look at me sometimes when you think Alice isn't looking. She sees it too. Wives aren't stupid you know." Her bra fell away and her small breasts, amazingly pert for a woman of her age and paler than her richly tanned skin, were revealed. I took a ragged breath.

"Larry, would you like to touch my breasts?"

I stood up, putting distance between us. Unfortunately, and inexplicably, I didn't account for the fact that I had on a pair of loose shorts and I had started to become partially erect. Marilyn noticed this, leaned back on the sofa and started to shimmy out of the little tennis skirt she was wearing. It was the kind with the built in panties. The paler skin of her hips and her lower belly appeared. I was rooted to the spot. She kicked off the skirt. She spread her legs slowly. She had a simple triangle of dark pubic hair that stood out like a target against the paler skin of her inner thighs, which she was running her hands down.

"Larry, do you know what Chip and Marilyn are probably doing right now?"

I was shivering, I couldn't breathe.

Marilyn let a finger drift along the slit between her legs. "Chip loves to kiss a woman here. I imagine right now his tongue is doing ... " she slipped a finger inside of herself and hissed gently "... this."

"Marilyn ... please ... don't talk about ..."

"What Larry? The fact that Chip is pleasuring your wife with his mouth? It doesn't bother me. No more than the fact that Alice will probably suck Chip's cock tonight. He really likes that. Does Alice like it when you cum in her mouth? I love it when Chip does that. I take him all the way down my throat and let him shoot his cum straight down it. Alice will probably do that to Chip tonight. She'll open her mouth wide, and let Chip's cock slide all the way in."

I couldn't understand what was happening. Marilyn was describing my worst nightmare, but I was becoming incredibly aroused.

I was mesmerized by what her fingers were doing. She had spread herself open but was only touching the outer part with her fingertips. The room was still dark but the lights from the pool had cast the room in a light blue glow that was glinting off the dampness between her legs.

"You know Larry, if you just want to watch that's okay with me. You can even play with yourself. It's no different than watching porn. You can fantasize about what Alice and Chip are doing." She turned and got on her knees, her arms resting on the back of the couch. She brought her hand back between her legs and continued to tease herself "Chip likes doggy style a lot. Does Alice? Will she get down on her knees and let Chip mount her?" She writhed her hips. "I bet she will. She'll push her ass back against him, helping him go deeeeeeper into her." She pushed a couple of fingers deep into herself and moaned.

I had my hand down my shorts and around my cock. Not stroking, just holding it.

Marilyn looked back at me. "Does that excite you, Larry? Picturing Chip's cock going deep into Alice's pussy from behind?" She looked down at my engorged member and grinned. "He's smaller than you, you know. Not a lot, but enough to make a difference. Alice might even want him to fuck her ass." Her fingers were moving slowly, she circled one around her little pink butthole. Wet sounds reached me. She had turned her head away from me. "Larry, would you like to jerk off on my ass while I play with myself? I promise I won't touch you. I won't even look." She continued to finger herself. She was breathing heavily. "But you better do it soon. I'm very orgasmic, I may cum soon."

I was now stroking myself. I felt simultaneously dizzy with lust and overcome with shame. I barely even jerked off in front of Alice. "Come closer to me Larry. You don't have to touch me. I just want you near me when I cum. Please?"

I shuffled forward, partially hobbled by my shorts that were now down around my ankles. I was behind her, close enough that, if I pointed my cock down a little, I could enter her. Her hips were twisting and swaying. The pale skin of her ass and her wet pink folds were almost lit from within, an illusion caused by the light from the pool. Her pink puckered hole winked at me.

She was arching her hips, giving me a real show. She wasn't looking at me. "You know Chip is going to cum inside of Alice, right? Alice will probably have her legs wrapped around him and will be whispering 'cum inside me' just as she starts to climax. Chip loves that. She'll moan and twist and scrape his back with her nails. She'll thrust her hips and spur him like a stallion until he shoots a big hot load into her."

This was wrong, everything about it was wrong. I shouldn't be aroused by this, But I was jerking myself frantically. What Marilyn was saying was driving me mad. I could picture it. I could hear it. I knew what Chip was feeling, how Alice could grip a man with her inner muscles and almost stroke him from inside. I could hear her moans and feel the flood when she came. I could imagine her juices mixing with Chip's cum and sliding down his cock.

Suddenly, from deep down, pushing through a lifetime of shame and hangups about sex, something emerged. I wanted Alice to have an orgasm. I wanted her to moan and twist and gasp as another man's cock was inside her. And I wanted to see it. I wanted to be there and share that pleasure and experience with her. I wanted to kiss her and hold her and tell her I loved her as she shook from a climax from another man. Would she say she loved me? Would she look into my eyes and say my name as she came? I wanted to find out.

Marilyn's voice broke through it all.