How could I have let this happen?
My husband and I live in a mid-sized city in Minnesota. My husband is a section supervisor at the local retailer. He works the afternoon/evening shift and is seldom home before midnight. Earlier this year, to make ends meet we rented the room to Brad, an 18 year old hockey player with the local semi-pro team.
Brad had never lived away from home before. He found the adjustment difficult. When his schoolwork began to slip, it affected his play. Team officials were concerned. They contacted me about arranging for a tutor. I had once been a pretty good student, so I offered to help. Brad didn't seem to mind. The money would come in handy. I opened up a bank account under my own name.
We had to work around the team's road trips and practices, but we managed. After lunch each day I would run the kids over to my sister's house. When Brad arrived home after school, he would go to his room and start his homework... and I was there to help him. Around dinner, my sister would drop off the kids. The schedule worked well. Brad's marks picked up in all of his subjects except for Mr. Sweeny's biology class. On the ice, he returned to form. Team officials were pleased. I was rewarded with a small pay raise.
One of the team's star players was a Russian named Yuri. Yuri was older than Brad, but they were in the same grade. Yuri was the captain of the team. He billeted with another family, just a few doors away. Brad sometimes invited Yuri back to our house after school to do homework. Yuri was a tall, rugged, handsome boy with a commanding presence. I liked having him around. I think he liked me too.
Most days, Brad would work seated at the desk and I would stand beside him. When Yuri was over, he would lounge on Brad's bed. Sometimes I caught Yuri looking at me. As time went on, it happened more and more. I guess I liked it... there was a certain taboo chemistry between us. I didn't think Brad was aware of it. Wrong.
One day in November, it happened. I was downstairs with Brad and Yuri. Just as we settled into work, Brad discovered that he was missing an assignment. Yuri suggested that Brad go back to school to retrieve it. In a flash, Brad was gone, leaving me alone with Yuri. I should have left the room immediately. As usual, Yuri sat cross-legged on the bed. He beckoned me over. "Karen, please to help?" he said. I sat on the edge of the bed, and leaned over to look at the question. Our arms accidentally brushed; at least I think it was accidental. The sensation was electric.
As if nothing had happened, I leaned over a bit more... and again our arms touched. I turned to look at Yuri. His face was just inches from mine. The attraction was magnetic. I was unwilling and unable to draw away. I could feel his breath upon me. His lips brushed mine once... and then again, lingering. Before long our tongues met. Rugged, handsome Yuri enveloped me in his arms. I should have protested, but I didn't. Instead, I let him lay me back on the bed. He showered me with kisses. Sensing no resistance, he moved his hand inside my sweater. "Please don't," I said, a protest lacking any conviction. I felt him cup my naked breast. With thumb and forefinger he tweaked my nipple. With shame I could feel myself becoming wet with desire.
It was then that we heard Brad coming. "Yuri, please let me up," I pleaded. He did so immediately. We straightened ourselves up as best we could. When Brad walked in, everything seemed normal. As Yuri left later that afternoon I whispered "Please keep this between us." That evening I couldn't stop thinking about him. To my husband I appeared very edgy. I had lots of time to think about my near-infidelity because the next day the team began a long road trip. The days seemed to drag by.
The team bus rolled back into town late Sunday evening. Normally my husband would do the pick-up. That night, I offered to do it. My husband was tired, so he gratefully accepted. It was a cold November night. I went to the arena a bit early. The heater in the pick-up truck was cranked. When the boys got off the bus, I noticed that Brad was limping. Accompanied by the team trainer, he hobbled into the arena. Yuri ran over to say that Brad had been hurt in the game that afternoon. "His leg stiffened up during the bus ride," explained Yuri. "Is he alright?" I asked. "The trainer says he just needs a muscle massage," replied Yuri. "Want to wait in the arena?" he asked. "No, the truck's warm and the arena's cold," I replied. "Get in here with me." We were alone.
The parking lot was soon empty of cars. I stared straight ahead, waiting for Yuri to make the first move. He put his hand around my shoulder and played a little with my hair. Sensing no resistance, he pulled me toward him. When he looked into my eyes, I melted. He brought his lips to mine. Without hesitation, I kissed him back. He soon had his hand under my sweater. Oh this young buck... he knew just how to touch a woman.
"Please Yuri, we shouldn't be doing this," I protested... but when he withdrew his hand, I betrayed my true emotions by whispering in his ear, "Oh please don't stop." It was then that I felt his hand on my knee. When I did not protest, his hand moved to the inside of my thigh and began urging my legs apart. Sensing no resistance, he began to tease me. His hand on my inner thigh went higher and higher, but I wanted more. "Touch me," I breathed. His hand drew closer, but still he hesitated.
"Please," I said in desperation, my hips gyrating. At last, through my jeans I felt him cup me. I moaned, wanting more. The windows of the pick-up quickly became steamy. That was a good thing, too, because the next thing I knew Brad was knocking at the window. Yuri and I straightened up. Then we let Brad into the cab of the pick-up. He knew that he had interrupted something, but he was not sure what.
After we dropped Yuri off, Brad and I drove the rest of the way home in silence. As we were about to leave the truck, Brad said, "Mrs. Fields, can I ask you something?" I nodded, worried about where this might lead. "Do you find me attractive?" he asked, turning, putting his arm on the back of my seat. "Of course, Brad, all the girls do," I replied evasively. "No, I'm asking about you, Karen. Do you find me attractive?" he asked, inching closer. "Yes of course, Brad," I whispered, turning my head to look into his eyes.
"Then kiss me," he said, forcing himself upon me, bringing his lips to mine. I tried to pull away without success. He pulled me close to him and kissed me harder. I don't know what came over me, but when his tongue brushed my lips, I confess I gave in and, for a brief moment, kissed him back. It was only when he started fumbling under my sweater that I came to my senses. I pulled away and hurried inside, flustered and confused.
I retired to my bedroom to find my husband already snoring. Try as I might, I could not get to sleep. I was worried about Brad. I was worried about what he might say. After all, he was still very young. I went downstairs dressed in my nightgown. I knocked on his door and was invited to enter. He was in bed, sheets pulled up around him.
"We have to talk," I said. "Sit down," he beckoned. I should have known better, but I guess I wasn't thinking straight. As soon as I sat down, he grabbed me and pulled me to him. "Stop, Brad, please," I hissed. "Let me kiss you," he whispered. By now his weight was on top on me, his arms pinning mine over my head. "I can't. It's not right," I replied, raising my voice slightly. "Shhhhh... do you want to wake everyone up?" he asked. "No," I hissed, my resistance weakening. "Then kiss me like you did in the truck."
Reluctantly I gave in. Sensing that my resistance was weakening, he released my arms. Without thinking of the effect it would have on him, my hands began to explore Brad's heavily muscled torso. Excited by this, our kissing became even more passionate. Through my nightgown I felt his hand on my breast. His touch was tender. He began tweaking my nipple. I felt it stiffen. My hips began to undulate gently.
Brad's hips responded with an urgency of their own and I sensed his growing hardness. It only made me hotter. My legs parted slightly, involuntarily really. Soon we were grinding our loins into each other. He then guided my arm to his waist. I let it drift lower, to his buttocks, seeking to encourage his thrusting. Only then did I realize that Brad was naked. Though the sheets were still partially wrapped around him, I knew I was really playing with fire. It took all my will to stop, but I did it. I scrambled out of his bed with at least some of my dignity still intact.
The next day I was beset by conflicting emotions. I needed time to think. I valued my marriage and my commitment to my children, but the experiences of yesterday rekindled memories of my wild teenage years. I yearned for Yuri's rugged touch. I wanted it like a child wants a toy at Christmas. Young Brad had also turned me on.