A Love Story

Quick writer's note:

Tags for this story: Affair, Cheating wife, Cheating, Consequences, Divorce, Regret

For clarification, this is not a BTB story. It is a sad story though -- so be warned!

This is the second story I wrote for Literotica even though it is just now being published. After the bruising, I received for 'Option #1 or #2', I put 'A Love Story' into abeyance for another day. I pulled it out recently and thought it might be time to refresh the story now that I've learned more and that now I'm working with a first-rate editing team and then publish it.

I sent the story to my collaborators and

Charlie

responded with some awesome ideas to polish the story up and make it worthy of your consideration. For his notable contribution and continued input, Charlie deserves co-author credit -- thanks, Charlie!

This is Chapter one of a two-part story, I have turned off the comments to this one but will turn them on for chapter 2. My hope is that you will consider them together during voting and posting comments.

I want to thank all my editors for their collaboration and input in this story; Charlie, John, Simepop, KenD, Demosthenes384bc

, Ma Fille Rouge, and HighLuster.

I love to collaborate with people and am always interested in expanding this editing team. If you are interested in being a part of our team, please send me your email address through private messaging and I'll shoot you, my stories.

I had just picked up the kids from my mom's and they were running around the house like wild animals. I was in the kitchen throwing dinner together, yet another quick macaroni and cheese banquet after a long day waiting tables. Business as usual.

Day waitresses don't make a ton of money and the tips aren't the same as they are during dinner service, but it is what it is. With three kids, I can't be picky about my shifts. I do a little better than the others because I'm younger and I'm not afraid to flirt with the old, fat businessmen who frequent the café. We eat a lot of boxed dinners because they're cheap and don't take a lot of energy to prepare. I don't have a lot of that left after being on my feet all day.

As if that weren't enough, a loud knock at the door startled me.

Who the hell can that be!

"Can someone get the door please?" I called out to the kids.

"I get it, Mommy!" It's amazing how excited about answering the door children can get.

"Hello?" It was Jimmy's six-year-old voice.

"Hi, is your mommy home?" The woman's voice sounded a little familiar, though I couldn't place it right away.

"MOMMY! A lady wants to talk to you!" I was already headed around the corner, still in my waitress uniform, wiping my hands on my apron. I stopped and recognized her instantly. A blast from my past was standing in front of me in my living room.

"Hi, Chels." It was Alice, my ex-husband's sister. She spoke loudly enough to be heard over the ruckus the two other kids were making as they stormed the door, but she wasn't shouting.

"Hi, Allie. It's been a long time. How can I help you?" There was only one reason why she would bother to find me. I felt my throat tighten and my mouth went dry.

"It's Brad, Chels. He died last week." She sniffled back her tears, her voice crackled with emotion. I knew how much she loved her brother.

It was like someone punched me in the stomach. I staggered back, landing on the worn couch. Little four-year-old Mary crawled into my lap and hugged me. She was always so attuned to the family's feelings, and I needed her hugs right now.

Allie surveyed the tiny apartment, looking first at tall, blonde Suzy, my oldest, who was holding the tiny hand of olive-skinned, dark-haired Jimmy. Allie smiled a weak smile at him. Then her scrutiny turned to the dark, curly-haired child in my lap. I could see Allie considering Mary's appearance. She took after her father. Her brown eyes, her caramel complexion, and her black, almost kinky, tightly curled hair were just like his.

Allie shifted her weight from one foot to the other. Her eyes finally locked onto my worn face.

"His funeral is Saturday at nine if you're available and want to attend. I would understand if you don't, but..." she hesitated for a moment, adjusting the notebook in her hands, then stretched out her arm offering me the book, "you may want to read this before you make any decisions." I looked at her and I'm sure she could see the confusion on my face.

"It's Brad's, a journal of sorts. He wrote about the important parts of his life. I know you and he didn't end on a good note, and I wouldn't have even thought of inviting you, but then I read his journal. When you read it, I think you'll see how important you were to him, Chels. I also think he would want you to be there."

I took the bound journal and inspected it. I saw that the edges were frayed. There was a large coffee stain on the cover, and I knew that Brad must have been journaling for many years. "I don't know. I'm not sure reading it would be the right thing to do."

"I'll understand if you don't want to read the journal, but I do hope you'll come to the funeral. A program is tucked into the cover. It has all the details."

"Ok, I'll see." I was as noncommittal as I could be, especially since I had no desire to attend the funeral of the man I still loved. Allie patted my oldest on her head and she turned to leave. I knew she wished that Suzy was Brad's. We both knew that she should have been.

Allie closed the door as she left, leaving me with three pairs of eyes peering at me as I sniffled, doing my best to keep the tears at bay. One rolled down my cheek anyway. I went back into the kitchen to finish dinner before I totally lost it in front of my children.

I fed the kids but skipped dinner myself. I didn't think I could hold anything down because my stomach was doing somersaults. It was about nine when I got everyone into bed and had a minute to sit down and relax. I spotted Brad's journal on the table and leafed through the pages. Brad's handwriting was so familiar. He always had such neat and precise penmanship.

Brad started capturing his life in his senior year of high school and then continued into college. Most of the entries were short, so he would pen several of them on the same page, following the same format each time.

Brad - June 8, 2001

This has been the best week of my life! I'm a brand-new Business Administration graduate and I just found out that I've been accepted into the Junior Management Training Program for Rudy's IGP Markets. They own several stores. The closest one is here in Greencastle, and there's one more in Cloverdale.

I'll start as a lead on the loading dock and in stocking next Monday! The only thing that sucks is I'll be working Thursday through Monday nights from eleven at night to seven-thirty the next morning. But, hey, I'm putting my Frontier Community College Business Degree to work!

Chelsea

I smiled at his excitement. It was obvious how much Brad's first real job meant to him. He always worked so hard to be just like his father. Brad was proud of his father. Jim had raised a family of five on a mechanic's pay and always wanted more for his children than he or his wife had. His dad put in a lot of overtime trying to help Brad limit his student loans. It really helped.

I paged through the next few months, only stopping at the high points of his life before he met me, but I didn't pay all that much attention. I was more interested in finding the entries about me.

August 24, 2001

My new manager is cool. He's in the same program and a few years older than I am and he's giving me the advice I need to help me move up the ranks. He wants me to learn the registers so I could fill in if need be. We have this one cashier that is so cute. She's been hanging out after her shift almost every night to talk with me. I'm thinking about asking her out. I found out that she's eighteen, so she's legal! Her name is Chelsea Winston. She gives me the idea that she would go out with me.

I'd have to be careful because she's still in high school and I'm in the management program, but since she doesn't report to me, my new manager said it wouldn't be against policy. If she keeps flirting with me, I will ask her out.

Time will tell.

Chelsea

I thought he was so cute back then. I tried my best flirty moves on him, but they didn't seem to work. I thought maybe I was too young for him, but now I see he was just shy, and nervous. A smile crept across my face as I thought of a young Brad and how confident he appeared despite his anxiety.

And just as quickly a frown replaced my smile and I became even sadder now, knowing what happened between us.

September 14, 2001

I did it! I asked Chels out for next week and she said "YES!" I'm so excited, I have a hard time believing that such a beautiful woman would want anything to do with me. I can't wait till Wednesday.

God, I hope I don't blow it.

September 21, 2001

Had my first date with Chelsea last Wednesday. We went bowling and hung out with a few of the guys from the store. She is so perfect. I found myself staring into those blue, liquid eyes all night. I couldn't stop. I didn't want to.

We discovered that we both had Mrs. Silburn for French class which resulted in my extreme embarrassment. I tried to impress her with my French by telling her how beautiful she is. I pulled her close to me and whispered, "Tu es si b

ê

te!" She pulled away from me and gave me such a shocked look. Then she saw the serious look on my face and started to giggle. Such a sexy giggle. Then a laugh. Then a full-on belly laugh. She laughed so hard that she fell off her chair. Everyone turned and looked at us. I was so embarrassed.

Finally, she got control of herself and slipped back into her chair. I could feel how red my face was. I was so confused. How could she embarrass me that way, I thought she liked me? She calmed a little, looked straight into my eye, "I think you're quite the animal too." She spasmed with laughter once again.

It was then that I realized my mistake. 'b

ê

te' is a beast or animal, and 'belle' is beautiful. It's been five fucking years since I had a French class!

I just sat there while my new work friends made fun of me. I'll never forget what Chels did, she leaned over and kissed me on my cheek, "As long as you'll always just be my beast." I thought I was going to die. I didn't and the rest of the night was almost perfect.

I had to get her home by eleven because it was a school night, but Chelsea allowed me to kiss her at the door. On the lips this time.

I've kissed a few girls, but none like Chels. She is so far out of my league. Her lips were so soft, I got a little feel of some side boob as we kissed, until her brother flashed the porch lights.

I can't stop thinking about those lips and those eyes!

I changed my mind. This night wasn't almost perfect, it was perfect!

Chelsea

That first date was so much fun. I couldn't believe my mom let me go out on a school night. I remember that Brad was so funny and so handsome. I thought it was a little weird that our first date was spent hanging out with Brad's coworkers, but discovered I liked hanging out with the older guys. I remember thinking that he was so mature. It wasn't until later that I discovered how inexperienced he was.

I found myself falling for him more deeply each time we hung out, whether it was at work, on a date, or anywhere else. I have no idea what he saw in me back then, but I knew what I saw in him. I was hooked.

I smiled to myself as I recalled that night. That first kiss. How he blushed. How his hand slid up my side, cupping my boob a little. I thought he was going for a full grope, but he never did.

I wouldn't have stopped him if he'd gone for more than boob, though. I always found it difficult for me to say "no" to guys when they made their moves--I wanted them to like me. That gave me a reputation as being easy. Back then I wondered if Brad had heard about that, and if that was the reason, he wanted to go out with me.

Not that I would have minded, he was always such a gentleman. I liked the way he treated me, so I was willing to let him have what he wanted. All he had to do was ask.

October 26, 2001

This week has sucked! Chels and I had a date planned for Saturday. One of her friends was throwing an early Halloween party, but her mom figured out that I was twenty-two and told her we couldn't date anymore! I'm so pissed!!

I think I'm in love with her. It broke my heart last night when she told me that she couldn't see me anymore. I feel a little lost and not exactly sure what to do next. One thing I do know is that I'm not ready to move on.

December 21, 2001

Officially Chelsea and I aren't dating any longer, but we see each other at work often and we've snuck out a few times without anyone knowing. I wish we didn't have to sneak around, but I'm so passionate about this woman that I can't resist her. I long to spend any time I can with her. If we must sneak around to be together I will

--

eagerly.

Chelsea

I remembered that so clearly, I didn't talk to my mom for an entire week. I thought she knew how old Brad was when we started dating, but she apparently didn't. She freaked when she finally figured it out. She thought that an older guy only wanted one thing from a teenage girl. I know that she was wild and that she hung out with some questionable people when she was my age. Now I figure she was just projecting her fears about guy behavior onto Brad.

Those were hard months for us. We weren't allowed to see each other so we snuck around. I lied to my mom when I went to Brad's. To hide my tracks, I also dated a couple of other guys including one named Chris. It was nothing serious between me and any of those other guys. I was just using them for cover. I used them for parties, hanging out, and stuff like that.

I did have sex with them occasionally, even though I hadn't slept with Brad at the time. I did it to keep them interested. It was fun, but it was different with Brad, I loved him. The other guys didn't matter so I just used them to get off while I saved my love for Brad.

Maybe that's when I got so twisted.

I should have waited for Brad. I loved him, and I so wanted our first time to be special. I didn't want it to be in the back of a car in some parking lot like it had been with the other guys.

If only I, had it all to do over again.

January 4, 2002

The holidays kind of sucked. I worked a ton of overtime because so many of my co-workers took vacation, and Chels barely worked at all. We only saw each other a few times during the whole holiday.

I miss her so much. How did I fall so in love with this girl?

I sometimes wonder if she is as in love with me as I am with her. I hear rumors that she dates other guys, but I haven't had the guts to ask her about that. I'm afraid that she'll tell me that she doesn't love me or that she doesn't want to see me anymore. I have no idea what to do next. She keeps putting me off when I ask her out.

Chels stayed late the other night to hang out with me as I unloaded a truck. Just before she left, I slipped and told her I loved her. She reacted so strangely. All she said was "Oh." I have no idea what to do with that. She said she had to go shortly after that and for the rest of the night I was in a deep funk.

Maybe she really is past me. Can I get past her?

My sister thinks so. She's trying to set me up with one of her friends. She's a sweet girl, closer to my age. I've never had two girls interested in me at the same time before so I'm not sure what to do. I'm getting the impression that Chels has moved on, the way she's keeping me at a distance. I truly do love her, but between her mom, who isn't allowing me to talk to her on the phone, and Chelsea, who isn't making time for me, I don't know what to do.

My sister keeps telling me to just go out with her girlfriend and see if there are any sparks. Allie is very blunt. She's trying to convince me that Chels has dumped me, and I need to get over it and move on.

Maybe I should.

Chelsea

I was very distant with Brad during that Christmas season, but we did get to sneak out together a few times. I was hurting because I couldn't be with him as much as I wanted to or needed to be.

My mom guessed that I might be sneaking out to see Brad and started to pay more attention to my activities. It made the holiday season tough. To throw her off her suspicions, I doubled down and dated that guy named Chris exclusively, except for the few times I snuck out with Brad. Chris was my age and my mom approved of him, so I used him to get out of the house and to have fun. I guess I formed a little crush on Chris which grew into something stronger by January. Not as strong as the feelings I had for Brad, but they were feelings.

I stayed at work late one night to tell Brad that I was seeing someone else. He caught me off guard when he told me he loved me, and I reacted poorly. I just left, never telling him why I was leaving, or that I was seeing Chris. I remember being so conflicted about wanting both Chris and Brad. I knew I would never be allowed to see Brad, so I was staying with Chris, even though he was my second choice.

Chris had a controlling nature. Without Brad's influence and support, it was easy to fall back into my old behavior. I just wanted to please the guy I was with. Chris took advantage of that and exerted more control over me both because I allowed it and because it was his nature. I was only allowed to be out with him and his friends. I was restricted from spending any time with others or on my own.

My mom approved of Chris. He treated me well enough, so I allowed the relationship to grow. I was having sex with Chris and the sex was okay. I was able to separate acts of love from sex acts, though with Chris the lines were starting to blur.

Tonight, maybe for the first time, I see how wrong I was, and have been, for most of my life. I loved Brad but allowed Chris to use me despite that. In a way I guess I was using him as well.

Either way, Chris was just a means for escape. He allowed me to get away from my mom and to socialize with friends, even though they were his friends. He had a car and money to spend, which made him even more appealing. I know now that the feelings that I thought I had for Chris weren't real. At the time I thought my freedom was more important than Brad was, so I pulled away from him and toward Chris. In hindsight that was a huge mistake.

I also had no idea that Allie was trying to set him up with other girls. I think she had seen me out with Chris once, so I figured that the other girls were her attempts to help Brad move past me. If only I had been honest with myself and had trusted Brad. We could have made it past that time of our lives without nearly as much pain and regret.

January 25, 2002

I did it! I finally asked my sister's friend Amy out last Tuesday and we had a nice dinner. She's a new teller at a bank, and we compared stories of wild customers and strange co-workers all night. She is so easy to talk with and we call each other almost every night. We're very compatible and it took only a few dates before I could see having a relationship with her. Since we're of similar age, our short-term goals, like getting married and having a family, align. Much more than Chelsea's and mine did.