Chapter 3 : Pix.
As I said earlier, I've never wanted to belong. I simply do not do 'community'. Give me one or two people with whom I can have the odd chat, and one at any given time to indulge my nastier side, and I'm happy with my books and music. But even I don't live in a complete vacuum, and I had a passing familiarity with others in my line of work. Sally Barclay was something approaching a friend: we were close enough in style to understand each other but different enough not to be direct competitors. It was nice, now and then, to be able to talk sex in the abstract with someone I wasn't doing sex to.
She was at the top end of the mainstream dominatrix trade, rather less subtle than me; and she carried it over into her personal life. She genuinely enjoyed all the leather bustier, Nazi peaked cap and 'call me Mistress' stuff that I can't abide. It was her kink, and no business of mine, but I have to admit I thought it a bit of a shame. I idly browsed the gallery on her website one day; whilst the shiny gear left me lukewarm at best, there was one picture of her in a non-camp Victorian governess look that was stunning. If I'd had a subordinate bone in my body, I'd have been round there on my hands and knees at once. Of course I didn't, and we'd never been interested each other in the physical sense. I won't say we weren't interested sexually, because for both of us sex was as much in the head as the groin, and we did play chess every other Wednesday.
'Sally' obviously didn't suit her persona in the least, and she had the taste not to go for Midnight or Viper or any of that nonsense. To almost everyone, she was Mistress Marcella. An obvious but very suitable choice, because her statuesque austerity and severe black hair owed more than a little to Detroit in that video. You know what I am like with names, I was immensely flattered that she expected me to call her Sal.
"Mind elsewhere?"
There was a distinct trace of the Mistress to her tone. I suppose I deserved it: she invariably won, but it was courteous of me to provide something of a challenge and obviously tonight was too easy. I took a long breath and told her the whole story. When I was done, she fetched wine and gave me a little space to reflect while she reset the board.
"So, you're having an affair."
"Errr ... Yeah, guess I am."
"Sex? Or love?"
"Come on, Sal, I don't do love. You know that."
"Sorry, poor choice of words. Are we talking about the thing you do that isn't love but you take very personally and seriously; or are we talking about the thing mere mortals do for fun?"
Ouch. Or rather not, because there wasn't any real mock to her voice. There was a little light distance because we were onto the type of subject which demands either laughter or tears, but she wasn't laughing at me.
"It's not ... It's not what I'm used to. I know she doesn't belong to me, not even for the moment. I've got to be honest, it's bloody hot when we do. Not in the usual way though. Jesus, Sal, I'm a creature of habit and this is weird and different. It's doing my head in."
"I really don't know what to say, V. I'm torn between telling you honestly as a friend that I think you'll regret what's coming, and being extremely selfish and bad."
"How so?"
"I've always respected your boundaries, haven't I? I understand who and what you are, but sometimes I think you might enjoy a little ..."
Significant pause as she toyed with the stem of her glass and studied the chess board. Then she fluttered at me with one of the looks that made her a pretty fair living.
"... Is she sexy?"
"Oh yeah. Very."
"Want to share?"
Of course I don't want to share with you, Marcella, because that's not remotely my scene. I don't mess about with this stuff: I absolutely and exclusively own them body and soul. I do not ... Send them home to get fucked silly by their husband, do I? I don't screw around, do I? I don't do that stuff β not because it's wrong, which I of all people am not fit to judge β it's simply not what floats my boat. Yet here I am, with my boat bobbing along on all sorts of unknown currents.
I never have, even in the drunk and loose whirl at uni' it was always one at a time. Surely you can't imagine I've never wondered ...
"Sal, could we open another bottle please?"
***
Hubby had two great passions. Using her as a vessel for his semen was one step below football. He went to every single game, which, with United doing so well in Europe that year, meant a lot of foreign travel and her free for my pleasure. I told her we were going out at the next opportunity.
"Virginia, where are we going?"
"We're going out, Pixie. That's all you need to know for now."
"Yes, Virginia."
I had her come round early and serve me in the shower β as a good and attentive maid, nothing overtly sexual at that time β and then give my hair a good brush and plait before putting it in a bun for me. Then I had her wait face-down on the anteroom lino with her arms spread out while I took my time getting dressed. My costume choice was not something I intended to share with her yet. I emerged from my bedroom in belted black raincoat, red latex gloves and strappy warrior sandals.
There are certain things I will not do. I can play all sorts of dress-up games indoors, and I'll drop unsubtle hints about how little I appreciate trousers, but I've never been into dictating exactly what they must wear if we go out. I find that disrespectful, and strange as this might sound I have the greatest respect for any woman who can take what I give out. Besides, it's not my choice; I like them to make some effort in their own mind to look nice for me.
She had on an entirely normal and respectable skirt, and as luck would have it there was an entirely normal and respectable slit at the back. I stopped for a moment to consider her raised bum and that tempting possibility. Part of me thought it might come in handy later; another part wondered if I should just stay in and keep her all to myself.
"Up you get, Pix. We'll take your car."
I held out my hand for the keys.
Marcella was bi and pretty well insatiable. She ran a harem of at least seven that I knew of, who managed to cover most of the available bases. Out of deference to my feelings, she had planned a girls-only night with a small cast. I strolled up the path and rang the bell, with Pixie two paces behind in the approved manner. The door was opened by a vision that made me swallow hard and Pixie's jaw drop.