The Sun On My Skin

This is my submission for the 'Summer Lovin' Story Contest 2015'.

As ever, I must thank Winterreisser for his diligent and careful editing, suggestions and encouragement and Kat for being my tester.

I hope you enjoy the story and, as this is a competition entry, please take a moment to cast your vote at the end. Comments are very welcome too as I love hearing from readers.

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An unexpected invitation

It seemed like a no-brainer: of course, I accepted Tina's invitation to go with her on her short summer holiday, once I finally understood what it was that she was proposing! No matter how well you get on with your boss, it's always so disconcerting to be called in and be told to take a seat.

I was a junior payroll clerk, my salary reflecting my lowly position and the fact that I was still training. Meanwhile, my tendency to indulge my interests in and enjoyment of the theatre, films and dining out ensuring that, what with rent and the rest, I had almost nothing left of my mediocre pay packet at the end of each month. This meant that affording a holiday this year was a pipe dream and the best I could hope for might be the odd few days visiting old school friends, now away at university, like Kevin who lived near York or Diana in Bristol; always assuming I could scrape together the rail fare, of course.

Tina, on the other hand, was the Senior Payroll Manager in the company and, while she shared similar interests in food, film and theatre with me (which accounted, at least in part, for our friendship) she commanded a decent salary. She could afford summer holidays.

It was a Friday towards the end of June and Tina had been out of sorts for a couple of weeks, just a bit distracted and somewhat gloomy and low, rather than her usual easy-going self. She'd not said anything about what the matter was and, while I considered Tina a friend, even quite a good friend, I didn't feel I could press her too much to talk about it, certainly not while at work, anyway.

So when Tina unexpectedly called me into her office that day, just before lunch, I wasn't sure what she wanted but wasn't unduly concerned; I knew I had been working hard and keeping up with my studies for the Payroll Management certification course so I couldn't imagine any problems there. Perhaps, I thought, she just wanted to chat or maybe she wanted to propose another round of 'We'll Try Anything', our occasional attempts to find dishes that one or other of us wouldn't eat. So far we'd had ostrich (very tasty), snails (okay, as they were pretty well drowned in garlic butter), oysters (I preferred them cooked to raw) and crocodile (like turkey but with a slightly odd texture). To date, neither of us had wimped out but it was only a matter of time before we moved onto really weird stuff like insects or jellyfish or koala-snot soup -- if we could find restaurants in London that served them! "Hi, Tina, you wanted to see me?" I said from the doorway.

"Ah, Jojo, come in, take a seat." I entered her office and sat down. "Now, as far as I can tell you've not booked any annual leave so far this year." This was true but I wasn't sure why this mattered. A worrying thought crossed my mind: what if I was being let go -- sacked, made redundant, whatever it might be called -- and they were working out what they had to pay for leave not taken. Something must have shown on my face because she added, "Jojo, don't worry, you're not in trouble." I looked at her and saw that, to my surprise, Tina seemed nervous; maybe she'd found the Koala-snot Soup Restaurant. "I, um, I guess I wondered if you hadn't booked leave because you haven't any holiday planned." The relief that I felt was now mixed with curiosity.

"No, I haven't anything planned. Actually, I don't really have the money to afford a summer holiday this year," I admitted, a little embarrassed. "Are you worried that I'll have too much leave left at the end of the year? I can take some days off and just, I don't know, do some studying at home or..."

"No no, Jojo, it's nothing like that," she interrupted and then hesitated. "I'd booked a holiday for two, for Alex and me but..." there was real sadness in her face and I had a faint inkling of what might be coming as she sighed, "the weekend before last Alex left me. I guess it's been on the cards for a while really." I recognised the name 'Alex' as her significant other, though whether he was her boyfriend or partner or possibly just flatmate I wasn't sure. I'd certainly never met him and, in fact, he was no more than a name as Tina almost never even mentioned him.

"Oh, Tina, I'm so sorry," I replied automatically, though I still meant it. "If there's anything I can do or if you want a shoulder to cry on..."

"No. Thanks, but no; I really don't want to talk about it," she said firmly, gazing down at her desk. "The thing is that I booked a short break holiday for the two of us in Spain and I really, really could do with getting away, you know? Just to be somewhere else, anywhere else, and away from all the reminders right now would do me good." I nod in sympathy but wonder where this is going. Is she going to ask me to cover for her? Surely not; either Janice or Malcolm would do that as they have done in the past. Tina looked at me again. "I was wondering... I mean, much as I want to get away I can't face going on my own so I was wondering, Jojo... would you come with me? On holiday, I mean."

"What, really?" I asked in surprise and something about the incredulous way I said this made Tina smile.

"Yes, really, Jojo! As I said, it's only a short break, just five days flying out at nine-thirty next Wednesday evening and coming back on Monday. You'd need a passport, obviously but I can definitely guarantee your leave request will be approved."

"How much would it cost?"

"Absolutely nothing, Jojo. It's all paid for anyway; I'd lose the money if I don't go and, as I said, I don't want to go alone. You'd need some spending money, of course," Tina added.

"Wow! Well, I'd obviously love a holiday in Spain but why me?" It occurred to me how little I knew of Tina outside of the office and our occasional ventures together into weird food and even more occasional trips to see small local theatre productions. She was clearly upset about Alex's departure but what that meant in terms of relationship breakdown I wasn't sure. How upset would she be on holiday and would I be spending five days commiserating while she drowned her sorrows? On the other hand, maybe she just wanted some company while she found some guy to hook up with, though I doubted that would take long given the way she looked.

"Because we're friends, Jojo, and partly, I admit, because you're not part of my other group of friends," she told me and I guessed she meant her friends that she shared with Alex, which made sense, "oh, and partly because you're a girl up for trying new things." She gave me a grin that, if anything, made her comment even more worrying.

"That sounds a little... concerning," I told her honestly. "What are you saying: that I'll be expected to do... what?"

"Nothing, Jojo. Honestly, I'm not expecting you to do anything but I like your sense of adventure, that you'll try something different; basically, you're fun," she concluded.

"Umm, it is very tempting, Tina," I admitted but I had a nagging suspicion. "Even though I'm sure there's something you're not telling me."

"Maybe... or maybe not," she said cryptically. "There are probably many things I ought to tell you and perhaps, if you come with me, I will." That certainly intrigued me but also made me more than a little apprehensive.

Jojo Remastered

Perhaps, dear reader, if you have made it this far into my story, I need to explain something of myself so you can understand what I was and what I was not at this time. What I

wasn't

was the gung-ho adventurer that Tina evidently thought I was. Oh, I

wanted

to be, desperately, I really did, and so I worked at it. I was successful too, mostly.

At school, I had been timid, always afraid of failure and therefore reluctant to try new things, convinced that I'd show myself up. I had a few friends, girls mainly, whom I'd gradually come to know and to trust as they saw me come out of my shell a little. I was studious, anxious to please my teachers and, as a result, academically successful. Socially, however, I remained much the same frightened mouse of a girl I'd always been.

Things only really began to change significantly when I started Sixth Form and A Levels. Some friends left the school while others took different subjects so I saw them much less at school. Consequently, I was forced to mix with new people and, with the change in outlook now we were no longer schoolkids, I managed to make new friends. By the second year, I had started going out more and, incredibly, I found I had a boyfriend! I was so in love with Jason, infatuated really; there was nothing I wouldn't do for him.

You can probably guess what happened. Jason started off nice, lovely and caring and maybe if I'd had more confidence and a greater sense of self-worth he would have continued being so. Instead, I was prey to my insecurities and fear of failure, always afraid that I would lose him. My studying suffered, of course; too much time out with him or daydreaming or worrying about our relationship. We started sleeping together when he suggested it: how could I say no and hope to keep him? Though part of me felt I was making a mistake another part was telling me I was finally a woman. I was an intelligent girl so I should have got myself on the pill of course, but I was shy and Jason was happy to use a condom... for a while.

Looking back there are so many 'should haves' and 'what ifs': I should have gone on the pill, I should have insisted on him using a condom, what if I'd had the courage to end the relationship, what if I hadn't got pregnant...

In the end, my pregnancy miscarried at five months, which was four months after Jason had last said a civil word to me. I was such a mess at that point, a weird mixture of deep sadness at the loss of the baby mixed with relief that the possibility of a motherhood for which I was completely unready had gone. It was no real surprise that the miscarriage, along with the pregnancy and the rest of the turmoil, all conspired to wreck my A-Level results: I managed a C in Maths, an E in English and failed History. These were nothing like the results I needed so there was to be no university for me unless I redid the year and somehow I couldn't face that. Even more sickening was that Jason had managed straight A's; there really was no justice.

And so, fourteen months ago, I came to work at this company, my father helping me to get a post in the Payroll section and on their training course. This was my new beginning, my chance to reinvent myself; I would not be the shy, timid girl anymore. It was hard but I was determined that I would be different and make new friends and try new things.

I changed my hair and had my ash blonde streaked with blue that I felt complimented my blue eyes. I tried to slim down a bit; I wasn't fat, just a bit too soft and round, and that, along with a new wardrobe, helped my confidence. When I met Tina for the first time at the job interview I shook her hand firmly, looked her in the eye and introduced myself as 'Jojo' rather than 'Joanne', the nickname my parents used sometimes. That was the start of the new me.

When the chance of a room in a shared house came via an old school friend's sister, I took it. It was a tiny room with a wardrobe and a washbasin in the corner but I wanted the chance to be away from home and pretend I was living the student life that my screw-up had deprived me of, even if I was actually at work and studying part-time.

Tina was a friendly, likeable and very approachable boss and we would talk during the day, not just about work. I'd always enjoyed the cinema and theatre: they're safe, dark spaces where people tell you stories, like being a child tucked up in bed and being read to. I found that Tina enjoyed them too and we would chat about films and plays we'd seen. She was something of a gastronomist and while my parents were never wealthy they did like to dine well on special occasions, which meant that I had an opinion on some of the food she dined out on. When she asked "What's the strangest thing you've eaten?" the best I could manage was paella, remembering the whole prawns and mussels dotting the enormous dish from which it was served. "Pfft, that's pretty feeble. Too scared to try frogs' legs or haggis I guess." And that was it: the 'I'll Try Anything' Club (membership: two) was born.

Will I, Won't I

And so there I was: did I accept Tina's invitation to accompany her on her brief summer holiday to Spain or not? Did I have the courage to remain my reinvented self or did I follow my instincts (or should that be my inner wimp?) and say no? I also wondered what exactly she wasn't telling me. On the other hand, this was a chance of a holiday and in Spain too... I wondered briefly if that made me shallow but Tina was a friend who wanted my companionship...

Tina looked at me questioningly; it was time to make up my mind. "Well, this does take 'I'll try anything' to a new level doesn't it?" I told her, trying to fight down my fears. She admitted it with a nod and slight smile. Fuck it, I thought. "I'll come, thank you, Tina." Her smile became a big grin.

"Thanks, Jojo," she said as she stepped around the desk and hugged me. This was a novelty but a nice one and after a brief hesitation, I hugged her back. "Er, you do have a valid passport, don't you?"

"

¡Sí, y puedo hablar un poco de Español!

" I told her, recalling a line from my GCSE Spanish.

"What?" she asked in surprise.

"I said 'Yes, and I can speak a little Spanish.'"

"Impressive; there are hidden depths to you, Jojo my girl. Look, I know we don't know that much about each other but someone once told me that if you want to really get to know someone you can either live with them for two years... or go on holiday together!"

"So after five days we'll know each other

muy

er," I hesitated; I knew the word for 'very' but was unable to remember the Spanish word for 'well'. "Um,

wellos

..." I hazarded.

"Jojo, just how much Spanish

can

you speak?" she asked, a trifle suspiciously.

"Damn, I was hoping you wouldn't ask that!" I said, smiling. "Actually, probably not much more than that; it's been nearly four years since my GCSEs. Still, I'm sure the odd word will come in handy."

The next few days were a bit of a whirlwind. I needed to get things together and buy some clothes, though Tina said we should aim to travel light. "It's going to be hot out there so we won't need too much and I intend to get a good tan! Lots of suntan lotion though, definitely." I guessed that meant she'd be practically living in a bikini; the image of Tina's almost six foot tall and evidently superb figure parading around in two small strips of cloth presented itself in my mind. Blimey, I was never going to get noticed next to her, not that men had featured much in my life recently.

Most males that I encountered attracted me not at all. There had been a couple of guys in whom I had raised just sufficient interest to date briefly but I have to admit that, after Jason, my heart hadn't really been in it with either of them; I really didn't want to fuck up my life a second time so played things cool. It turned out that neither guy was interested in a moderately friendly but slightly cautious girl -- who wasn't even going to go halfway, let alone all the way! -- and after a few dates both simply walked away. I can't say it upset me much.

The following Wednesday seemed to take ages to arrive and yet suddenly I was heading into work towing my small, pull-along suitcase. I had, as instructed, tried to pack light but I had to assume we'd be dining in restaurants and maybe going to nightclubs in the evenings, so a few changes of clothes would be necessary. Then, of course, there were toiletries, a little makeup, sun cream (especially with my fair skin), shoes... As a result, I was stunned when at lunchtime Tina showed me her luggage: a small holdall that I was convinced would qualify as hand luggage and I told her as much. "Possibly, though I think it's a little oversized for that," she replied. "Anyway, there's that rule about fluids and I've bottles of shampoo and the like that aren't allowed in hand luggage." I was even more amazed.

"Tina, are you actually taking

anything

to wear or are you planning to spend the whole time in bikinis or less?" I laughed.

"Hmm, less sounds fun!" she laughed back at me. "There'd be no tan lines either; perhaps I should give it a go. Would you?" she asked.

"What, go topless? Well, maybe," I replied somewhat dubiously. I doubted I would, not when it came to it, but I didn't want to give up my 'try anything' reputation just yet.

"Cool, we could do it together." Oh shit, had I just committed to this?

"Tina, is this going to be five days of trying new things?"

"It certainly can be!" she replied but must have seen some nervousness in my face and added more gently, "but nothing you're not happy with, I promise, Jojo."

"Thanks, Tina, that is good to hear," I told her earnestly. "Now, can I buy you lunch? You're treating me to a holiday so it's the least I can do."

"Not a 'we'll eat anything' challenge I assume?"

"No, I don't think so," I replied. "Apart from the fact that there wouldn't be time, it seems..." I was going to say 'it seems you have enough "try anything" challenges planned already,' but that sounded a bit cowardly so I finished with "...that being in Spain we should be able to find some weird local delicacy to challenge us."

"Very true. Okay, let's do lunch, holiday buddy!" Tina turned me around by the shoulders and gave me a little shove. "Quick march!" she ordered.

"Yes, boss," I laughed. I had never seen Tina in quite such a playful mood and felt this boded well for the coming days.

Late Arrival

Well, the journey turned out to be on the difficult side of hellish. Checking in for flight CHA304 to Malaga went smoothly enough and the queues weren't too bad, apparently. This was only my third time flying so the whole airport experience was overlain with feelings of novelty and excitement. I don't think the same was true for Tina who seemed to find it rather mundane.

We headed through customs and the whole rigmarole of removing every item of metal or electronics from our bodies along with our shoes and then being scanned, our bags x-rayed and, in my case, also being given a pat-down search by a surprisingly pretty woman from the Border Agency. Obviously all international terrorists have blue-streaked hair, I assumed but, in fact, it was because a set of keys to my parent's house were unexpectedly in the top pocket of my denim jacket and they had triggered the metal detector.

Once through Passport Control, we had a drink, white wine for each of us, while we waited for our flight to be called. We arrived at the gate in good time and before long we were sat in our seats, me by the window (Tina having sensed my excitement and insisted) and Tina in the middle of the three seats. We waited for take-off and I was, I admit, nervous. And we waited... and waited. Eventually, we were informed that one of the passengers had been deemed too drunk to fly and that his luggage had to be unloaded from the hold.

Three rather loud and at least slightly drunk, twenty-something lads entered the plane. Going by what they were saying, it was their friend, Robbo, who was the cause of the delay. The three of them were noisy, crude and quite unpleasant. "I hope they're not going to the same resort as us," I remarked to Tina.