Than You Miss Georgia

Caitlyn wasn't cruel, but she knew what she wanted. No, that wasn't exactly true. But she knew what she didn't want. Reed Massimo was sweet and considerate, although a little exhausting to be around. He had been her boyfriend for six months, bringing her coffee daily and flowers occasionally. A perfectly good man, Caitlyn knew her parents would approve. But as always, she got restless. Being in a relationship for longer than a few months made her want to run, to be free of the expectations of engagement, marriage, kids. So, on an evening like any other, she broke his heart as gently as she could.

Like always, Caitlyn moved on with a lingering sadness that faded as she poured herself into academics. This was her element - writing, researching, presentations, all in preparation for law school. It was the noblest mission she had, to become someone great, make her parents proud. It had always been easier to focus on school anyway, rather than relationships. She doesn't need anyone. Not now.

The library at Prymoor University was cast in the glow of mid-day sun shining from the wide, oval-shaped skylight above. The air was crisp and cool, quiet conversations from students the only sound above the clicking of keyboards and turning of pages. Caitlyn headed for the political science section, scanning the shelves for a book she had been assigned to write a report on. After a thorough look, she couldn't locate it. Libraries had always overwhelmed her with the sheer amount of knowledge they contained, and Caitlyn figured she would ask an expert before giving up.

"Excuse me. I'm looking for Foundations of Political Theory. It's..."

Caitlyn finally met the gaze of the woman sitting at the reference desk and all words failed her. She was an older woman, maybe in her early forties, but with the bright eyes of a teenager. The lines in her face were slight, cheeks rosy. Her dark auburn hair cascaded in waves down her shoulders. Blouse buttoned just enough to remain professional.

"Foundations of Political Theory?"

Heat rose to Caitlyn's face as she realized she was staring at the librarian's chest.

"Ah, um. Yes, I need it for Professor Silvestri's class."

The librarian smiled at her politely and typed a few words into the computer. "Be right back."

Caitlyn pulled her jacket a little tighter around her as she waited. The woman was gorgeous no doubt, but anyone would be able to see that. The idea of the librarian's blouse unbuttoned passed through Caitlyn's mind and a small, involuntary thrill darted through her body. She shut that down as quickly as possible.

"Here you go, darling," the woman said, handing her the book.

"T-Thank you."

The woman radiated warmth. "Of course. By the way, I'm Georgia Dunham. I just started here, so I'm making it a point to introduce myself to students."

Caitlyn clutched the book harder than necessary. "I'm Caitlyn...Kaufmann. And it's nice to meet you, Ms. Dunham."

She grimaced, but then smiled. "Just Georgia is fine, please."

There was something strange about addressing a superior in this way, and Caitlyn hesitated. Georgia saw it in her face, and leaned in closer.

"Well,

you

can call me Miss Georgia. If you'd like."

Heat shot through Caitlyn at her words. Miss Georgia. It seemed juvenile, like it was something a pre-schooler would call their teacher, but for some reason it felt right.

"Then...thank you for your help, Miss Georgia."

And Caitlyn darted out of the library as fast as she could.

* * *

There were 32 little angels on the ceiling, stupid, fluffy reminders of her parent's wealth. Her parents hired the best painters in Prymoor to create a mural on the ceiling of Caitlyn's childhood bedroom, which happened to be her young adult bedroom as well.

She counted the cherubic faces over and over again, anything to distract her from those wide green eyes. And god, those lips. Dark red, round like cherries. Caitlyn imagined the taste, then snapped out of it.

No. Hell no.

Caitlyn had only had boyfriends, only envisioned herself with a man. She just hadn't met one that she felt particularly strongly for...and she had certainly never thought of herself with another woman. In the odd dream, here or there, sure. But that didn't count. Right?

And Miss Georgia. She was old enough to be Caitlyn's mother. And that was...No. This whole situation was ridiculous.

But as Caitlyn drifted off to sleep, she saw Miss Georgia in the library, walking behind the reference desk in that tight, charcoal skirt, hugging a body that defined the word 'hourglass'. Fantasy crept into memory and Caitlyn saw herself standing in the library, Miss Georgia watching her. She began to take off her clothes, baring herself to the librarian.

Caitlyn offered herself to Miss Georgia.

* * *

The dream was an anomaly, she reasoned. In no world would Caitlyn be truly attracted to Miss Georgia. It was wrong. It was weird. Miss Georgia was a fresh face in Caitlyn's fog of loneliness without Reed, that's all.

But she needed another book.

"Patterns of Democracy?" Caitlyn was wringing her hands, swaying slightly in front of the desk.

Miss Georgia was wearing green today, a deep emerald that contrasted the gold chain and earrings she wore. She gave a dazzling smile that sent a shiver through Caitlyn.

"You're a studious one, aren't you?" Miss Georgia headed toward the back.

Caitlyn felt herself blush, her gaze dropping to Miss Georgia's skirt once again, this time, a fashionable dark tweed. But Caitlyn couldn't give a damn about the material. She watched the swing of her hips, the curve of her ass. She disappeared from view and Caitlyn scolded herself. It was beyond inappropriate to ogle at Miss Georgia, but there was something undeniably magnetic about her body. But Caitlyn wasn't...

No, of course she wasn't. She was just admiring the outfit.

"You know, this one was actually on the shelf." Miss Georgia said, walking back, a small knowing smile on her face.

"Oh... I must've missed it. Thank you."

Miss Georgia held her gaze for a moment, and time seemed to stop. Caitlyn could feel her ears turning red. She should go. Now.

But in her delicate hands, Miss Georgia held out a flyer to Caitlyn. "I'm the faculty supervisor for the LGBT alliance, and it's our first meeting of the year. Just trying to spread the word."

Caitlyn took the flyer without thinking, and then stuttered. "I'm...I'm not. I mean, of course it's fine if you are, I mean, if people are. But..."

Miss Georgia giggled and rolled her eyes. "Then congrats, you're an ally. Tell your friends."

Before Caitlyn could embarrass herself further, she held the book tightly to her chest and turned away.

* * *

Caitlyn leaned on the edge of the planter in the mall, the wide leaves shading her as she stood with her friends. It had taken consistent prodding from Molly, Florence, and Jason to get Caitlyn to come out with them. They assumed that her head was always stuck in a book, wading through her rigorous studies. It was partially true, but there was something Caitlyn was desperate to figure out to the detriment of her social life. It involved some intense Googling and less-than-satisfactory masturbation, which took up more of her time than she'd like to admit.

"Earth to Caitlyn. Coffee?" Molly waved a hand in front of her face, then frowned. "Are you okay?"

Caitlyn blinked back to reality. "Yeah, of course. Just a bit tired."

They headed toward a narrow cafe, which was tucked between stores like an afterthought. Her friends settled at a round table, sipping mochas and lattes. Caitlyn took a sip of her coffee, trying to be present in the moment.

"Yeah, curling isn't a real sport," Jason scoffed.

Florence narrowed her eyes in annoyance. "Sure it is. It's in the Olympics."

"Ever the jock, Jason." Molly laughed. "Just because you're a lacrosse champion doesn't mean you have to yuck somebodies yum."

The conversation passed over her like white noise as Caitlyn watched the people go by from the front window. It was calming - nameless humans going about their little lives, worries unknown to her. It was an oasis of simplicity in the turmoil she was trying to pull herself out of.

Be here with your friends, remember?

But with the chime of a bell, Georgia Dunham entered the coffee shop with her unmistakable hair and dark jeans that were tight in the right places. Suddenly, Caitlyn would rather be anywhere but here. Still, her eyes followed the woman as if under a spell. Miss Georgia sat with her drink and pulled out a new book, slowly cracking the spine. A science fiction novel of some kind, but it didn't matter.

Caitlyn took the time to study her face from afar. Long lashes framed those dreamy eyes, her nose sloped and curved down a bit at the end. Perfectly kissable, something gentle in the light of the morning. And her mouth, her tongue licking the coffee foam from her lips. A sense of want ached in Caitlyn.

In an instant, Miss Georgia's eyes met hers. Caitlyn choked on her coffee.

"Jeez Cait, you good?" Jason grimaced and hit her on the back a bit too hard.

She didn't answer. She just watched as a mischievous smirk graced Miss Georgia's face and with a subtle motion of her hand, she beckoned Caitlyn to her table. A crackling spark lit inside her, but rationality bit back.

Absolutely not. You're not gay, you're just horny. It's time to get back on the apps.

Miss Georgia's gesture was surely coincidental, just some far-fetched miscommunication. But as the older woman's gaze burned into Caitlyn, she knew it was a cheap excuse and her legs seemed to move without her realizing.

"Be back, going...over there," Caitlyn muttered to her friends. They nodded and waved her off.

Her nerves eased a bit as she was met with a radiant smile, but it dropped with Miss Georgia's stern command.

"Sit, Caitlyn."

And Caitlyn sat, hands tightly clasped in her lap, trying to breathe at an even pace. She had never seen Miss Georgia look so serious before. An extra dose of fear pressed on her like a wool blanket.

"I can tell you're a sweet girl. Can you give me a little explanation of why you've been staring at me?"

Caitlyn's heart sunk and melted at the same time. "I r-really didn't mean to, I'm so sorry."

Miss Georgia shook her head. "Darling, we're past that. You've been staring since I handed you that one book, Foundations something- "

"F-Foundations of Political Theory."

"That's the one," Miss Georgia snapped her fingers. "So...explain yourself."

To her dismay, truth started churning through Caitlyn's mind, threatening to spill out of her mouth.

I want you. I don't know why, but I do. Just being around you makes me feel like I'm losing my mind. Please, Miss Georgia. I want you to f-

"You're beautiful," Caitlyn scrambled for the words as fast as she could. "I...admire your sense of style."

Miss Georgia raised her eyebrows. "Hm, alright then," she shrugged and then smiled, just with her eyes. "But for what it's worth, you're beautiful too."

The comment had Caitlyn like a deer in headlights. No words came to mind, just a breath in, lips slightly parted and her eyes dilated at the object of her desire.

"Listen," Miss Georgia said. "I think maybe you're looking for something, and I have that thing you're looking for."

She proceeded to pull a pen from her purse, and shuffled around in her Victoria's Secret bag for the receipt. In a wavy script, she scribbled her phone number on the back and slid it over to Caitlyn.

To keep from taking it was a Herculean feat and Caitlyn was no hero. She desperately wanted to read the receipt. To memorize that phone number. But she slipped the paper in her pocket without looking at it, as casually as she could.

"Now, I want you to go back to your friends. Go enjoy the rest of your day. But first, I want to hear you say something."

A solemnity fell over her face again. "Repeat after me."

Caitlyn inhaled like it was her last breath before sinking.

"Thank you, Miss Georgia."

It was very simple. Four words, the key to get out of this nightmare situation. It was something Caitlyn would say anyway, perhaps upon borrowing another book. But Miss Georgia's words dripped with a sweet, secret darkness, and against every ounce of reason left in her body, Caitlyn wanted it badly.

Her words came out in a near-whisper. "Thank you- "

"Louder."

The sharpness of Miss Georgia's voice startled her. It felt like Caitlyn's spirit floated above her body as she heard herself say it again.

"T-Thank you, Miss Georgia."

And as Caitlyn turned, finally free to rejoin her friends, she heard Miss Georgia whisper.

"Good girl."

* * *

Rose satin slip, black lace bodysuit. Embroidered bra and V-string set. Caitlyn read through the receipt again, then recited the phone number back to herself in a mumble. Her heart pounded with every round of repetition, each item on the list conjuring the corresponding image of Miss Georgia's perfect body.

All of this was highly improper. She should throw the receipt away, burn it even. Certainly never step foot in that library again. But thinking of Miss Georgia wrapped her in warmth, in heat. Caitlyn was getting wet.

Her recent attempts to get off were frustrating, but for the umpteenth time this week, she put her headphones in and browsed for a good video. She settled on something generic, a 'girls get railed' compilation. While pulling off her leggings and underwear, she was overwhelmed with the desperate need to climax, as she hadn't been able to push herself to completion for so long. Since she met Miss Georgia.

Laying on her stomach, she nestled her hand between her legs and played the video. She could feel the moist heat against her fingers and palm as she watched a series of women take hard cocks in varying rhythms. Caitlyn focused on the men's thick rods, reminded of the routine sex her previous boyfriends would expect. Dicks were fine as far as she was concerned. Nothing special, a fact of life. Every woman felt that way, she was sure.

After three videos, she felt the tension of a cramp in her hand and she cursed. Just like every time, she couldn't get there, not fast enough anyway. But as her eyes drifted to the woman's bouncing tits, excitement began to swell in her again. Finally, she gritted her teeth and faced the obvious.

She searched lesbian porn for the first time in her life. Scrolling past the harshly-lit, overproduced offerings, she clicked on the first video tagged 'romantic'. Two women were bathed in a soft yellow glow and embraced each other on a wide bed dressed in satin sheets. They kissed slowly, running their hands all over each other's bodies. At this, Caitlyn's heart began to pound and she could feel a slickness running down her fingers.

The women in the video began to move with passion, one pinning the other to the bed and licking down her body. There was something so soft about it, yet so incredibly hot that Caitlyn felt like she was set aflame, inside and out. She got into a rhythm of pumping her fingers, reaching inside herself to press on her G-spot. Fuck, it felt so good. So much better.

They were face-to-face now, long black hair cascading over the woman below. They gently pressed their mounds together, slowly grinding back and forth. The camera zoomed in close enough to show the women's hard clits brushing against each other. This made a tension climb in Caitlyn's body. She didn't even know women could fuck each other like that.

But goddamn, she wanted it. And she knew who she wanted it with.

So she let the dam break in her mind. She closed her eyes, the moans and whimpers from the video washing over her, driving her ever closer. Caitlyn's imagination created a scene in the cafe at the mall. There was no slow teasing, no allusions or hints. She saw herself naked on the cold, tiled floor, Miss Georgia underneath her. Caitlyn was riding her like the girl in the video, humping her sex against Miss Georgia and watching her tits move with every thrust.

In reality, Caitlyn was soaking the bed with her drippings and sweat poured down her face. She was close, so fucking close. Nothing else seemed to matter, only pleasure, only release, only Miss Georgia. She could feel her hard clit sticking out, and she pressed her palm against it, rubbing hard. Oh god.

The orgasm that she'd been chasing for weeks was finally approaching, and Caitlyn's mind let loose with thoughts she would never allow herself to think.

Please Miss Georgia, fuck me. I want you to fucking ride me, to press your hot cunt into mine and make me cum all over you. Oh god, oh fuck...

"Ohhh, Miss Georgia!"

Caitlyn went rigid and came hard, harder than she ever had before. Her whole body throbbed with ecstasy as her pussy pulsed and squeezed around her fingers, bathing them in hot, slippery juices. Her clit was swollen and sensitive, shocks of pleasure tingling through it. She buried her face in her pillow, muffling her loud moans as much as possible.

Eventually, her breathing evened and her right mind returned as she came down from her orgasm. A wave of shame washed over her as she realized there was no more room for denial. She wanted Miss Georgia under or above her, touching her, kissing her. Notwithstanding the nastier, filthier things she was just starting to uncover her desire for. But the shame served to arouse her even more.

Outwardly, she was the top of her class and the pride of her parents, but behind closed doors, she was a needy slut desperate for the sexual attention of an older woman. Caitlyn shut the laptop and muttered to herself.

"Fuck, I guess I

am

gay."