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I couldn't believe that it was time for my high school reunion. I'd had to do a quick count in my head when I received the announcement to make sure it was right. It was. I'd gone to school in the day's where you could still say "Papa Don't Preach" because "Love Is A Battlefield" but don't worry "Billie Jean Is Not My Lover" and anyway "What's Love Got To Do With It" sometimes "Girls Just Want To Have Fun" but I'm still "Like A Virgin" and people would know what you were going on about. When Kylie Minouge still just wanted to do the locomotion Madonna didn't have her faux British accent and Alanis Morissette was still doing bubble gum pop instead of being all angst filled tormented.
I didn't even know if it would be worth going. I had been shy in high school and as a result people barely noticed me. I was smart and I did my work I was even kind of pretty if a little chubby. I hid beneath baggy jeans and large t-shirts. I wasn't what you'd call an attention magnet. I'd had a few friends that I'd kept up with when I was in college but even those correspondences had eventually fallen away.
After thinking about it a few days I went ahead and RSVP'd it was months away after all and if I changed my mind I could always just skip it.
In the end I decided to go to the reunion more out of curiosity than anything else . The first night there was to be a cocktail hour or some such thing at the Biltmore Country Club then a picnic the next day followed by a banquet that evening. I packed more than necessary and flew into the small town where I'd attended high school. I hadn't been back in years .My parents had moved to Florida shortly after I'd graduated and my brothers and sisters were strewn with their respective families all about the United States.
When I arrived at my hotel in the afternoon I unpacked and took a nap. When I rose to take a shower it was still light. I paused at the window to take in the town, little had changed the tallest building in town aside from the hotel was still the bank. The only thing that interrupted the flow of the landscape I'd known was the new Wal-mart over on Sycamore Street. I felt as though I'd entered a really boring and uneventful time warp. As I walked into the bathroom to start the shower I idly wondered if I was the only lesbian in our graduating class.
I'd never really been in the closet, I'd always somehow known that I was a lesbian though I couldn't identify my feelings until I was in my early teens. While I didn't intentionally keep my sexual orientation a guarded secret I wasn't really one to go shouting it from the rooftops either. As a result only a few people knew. I later learned everyone who was privy to the facts seemed to have some reason to hide it.
My mother was running her own daycare at the time and most of the parents in our town would have yanked there kid out of there fast enough to make your head spin. My sister who was a year older and my brother who was two years older didn't want to be stigmatized or painted with the same brush, so they had their reasons. And then there was Shelby-Ann Tucker. She knew all right.
She was my first "girlfriend"
But she was also the daughter of a minister and the president of our senior class. Two facts that had complicated our relationship immensely. She had eventually ended up dumping me and breaking my heart. Everything had seemed so paramount and important back then, but when I looked back years later I realized I hadn't loved her, I'd clung to her because she was the first person who opened herself up to me in a sexual way.
It was funny though in our small hick town no one would have guessed that all these secrets were being harbored because everyone was under the misguided impression a lesbian was a butch, unfeminine female who wanted to be a man. That was not the case with me I didn't learn about labels until well into my second year of college but I found that I was never a butch or a bull dyke or any phrase synonymous with those words. I was what some would call a femme or a lipstick lesbian. I enjoyed wearing dresses and makeup and having my hair and nails done. I also relished in my own femininity, loving the familiar sway, fullness and, weight of my breasts, and the way my hips spread beneath my narrow waist drawing the eyes of men and woman alike as I walked. My long legs and firm thighs are a bit on the skinny side though I feel that they're one of my best features.
As I looked at my face in the mirror I tried to remember the girl I had been. My once layered and impossibly teased hair lay in gentle waves around my heart shaped face. My almond shaped hazel eyes were wide set and of course the same. However they appeared bigger because they were no longer surrounded by heavy purple liner or electric blue eye shadow. My face had lost all semblances of childhood a long time ago my cheekbones were well defined and my lips were full but the roundness that had once made me look very young was gone. My body was changed the most. I had lost weight after high school. I'd never been truly fat only because of my height. I was 5'11 and chubby. What my dad had always called "A big, healthy girl". Now I was slim and toned.
My skin was smooth and caramel brown and well taken care of. A few years ago I'd gone on a health kick, which incidentally had inspired my exercise and weight loss as well as a new diet. I ate mostly fresh fruits and vegetables and very little meat. I also drank 10-12 glasses of water a day and at least one salad. It had become a way of life although I wasn't a zealot about it. Every now and again I had fast food or a rich dessert or two. But my diet and avoidance of the sun undoubtedly made my skin look good. Better than when I was a teenager really.
I'd never been cute, my height and back then my weight had always made the word sound preposterous when paired with my name. Even now I had gone from being "pretty" or "okay" to attracting wolf whistles , cat calls and stares when I went out. I was surprised and flattered by this attention. although it did cause me to reflect and be thankful that I'd never had self esteem problems in the past.
Snapping out of my reminiscences I applied a coat of gloss to my lips and surveyed the outfit I'd chosen.
I was wearing a gray pin stripped suit The jacket was fitted and I wore only a bra beneath it. It was cut low enough to show off a bit of cleavage but not so low as to seem trashy. The straight skirt fell just above my knee and a pair of sheer gray stockings complete with garter belt and garters because I hated pantyhose and had abstained from wearing them for my entire adult life.
The ensemble was completed by a pair of light metallic silver stilettos whose heel was at least three inches. The outfit was a little less than casual but as a criminal defense attorney business suits were what made up most of my wardrobe. Since I had put off my decision to come until the last minute I hadn't had enough time to shop for more appropriate clothing. I just hoped the Biltmore Country club still has air conditioning because if not I was going to burn up in this suit.
I grabbed my purse and the hotel key and left the room as satisfied as I was going to be with my appearance that night. When I pulled into the Biltmore and handed my keys to the Valet I saw that many people had arrived before me. Try as I might I couldn't associate any of the faces I saw with the people I'd gone to school with. Then I saw her there was no mistaking who she was.
It was Shelby- Ann
she was standing a good 12 feet away from me but instinctively my mouth grew dry as my palms became sweaty. She hadn't noticed me yet so I took her in. Unlike me Shelby-Ann had always been the perfect cookie cutter image of a small town southern girl. From the crown of he blonde head to the soles of her feet. She was as petite as ever barely 5'3 and I could vividly recall her petite frame in my arms, as I toyed with her small breasts and felt the slickness of her sex.
Her once permed hair was pulled into a long straight pony tail with a pink ribbon tied in a bow on top of it, and she had on a sundress with a sickening amount of flowers on it, her skin was unnaturally tan, even for someone who lives in a warm climate. I guessed she frequented the tanning beds. Her legs were still sensational and her white high heeled sandals were sexy but somehow innocent at the same time.
I couldn't decide what to feel She looked good in a Barbie doll kind of way but I didn't feel that sexual pull that I'd always acquainted with her. Her accent that was once endearing seemed overly dramatic to my northenized ears, and her blue eyes seemed harder and less trusting than before, but I could say the same about myself. I had been staring at her for about two minutes when she turned and looked right in to my eyes. She had felt my stare like a physical touch but when she looked at me it was as if she didn't know who I was. There was no hint of recognition in her brief gaze as she turned away and continued her conversation.
I walked away, toward a table where there were nametags affixed to high school pictures of the owner. I located mine as the person behind the table claimed we'd been "Best friends!". I looked at her name tag it read Barbara- Jean Faris. I had no idea who this woman was and I doubted that we'd been friends at all let alone best friends.
"I was on the soft-ball team with you junior year remember?"
"Sure" I lied with a smile "those were the days huh Barbara -Jean?"
She beamed as I walked away, Shaking my head.
"I should have stayed home" I mumbled under my breath
"What's did you say?" Asked a familiar voice, as someone tapped me on the shoulder
When I turned around I was face to face with one of the most beautiful woman I'd seen in a while.
