[This story has butch lesbian characters who use she/her, they/them, and he/him pronouns.]
We get the gang together for a night of drinking and shooting the shit. Zeke, Cal, Max, Lou, and Parker are all in my Toronto apartment, sitting around my dining table with a mix of drinks, cigarettes, and boisterous laughter. Zeke cracks open a beer bottle while arguing with Lou about where to go tomorrow night. Max is rolling a joint and yelling at Parker for being a pussy who doesn't smoke weed. Parker calls them a shithead. These are my friends, in all their cursing, shit-talking, rough-and-tumble glory.
"Hey Charlie!" Cal calls over the noise.
I turn. "Yeah?"
"Do you have a deck of cards?" she yells. I nod and go to the living room bookshelf to search for them between Boots of Leather, Slippers of Gold and the latest issue of Butch is Not a Dirty Word. My apartment is as gay as I can make it. There's a pink and orange lesbian flag hanging above my TV. A rainbow flag in the window. My two cats hide in the corner, away from the noise. I have a wall of butch and lesbian art in the dining room, where I return with the deck of cards for Cal.
"Thanks, babe," she chirps. She pulls the cards out and starts shuffling. Being called babe makes my heart stutter. I've had a crush on Cal for a while. To be honest, I've had a little bit of a crush on all of my friends.
I sit back down and pick up my black cherry White Claw, my "pussy drink" as Max calls it. I don't like beer or liquor and they make fun of me relentlessly for it. I take it with a laugh but truthfully I wish I was a little tougher with my tastes, if for no other reason than to stop being called a pussy all the time by Max.
Music plays in the corner, an alternative playlist that Parker put together. The joint makes its way around the table, a beautiful mahogany piece that was a fucking nightmare to get up the three flights of stairs, but thank God for my muscular butch friends.
"So what are we playing?" Zeke asks, passing the joint to Lou.
"Poker, of course," Cal grins.
There are hoots and hollers but Zeke yells, "Oh fuck no! I'm broke as fuck!"
"Oh, come on," Cal urges. "Twenty bucks."
"Nah, dude, I'm out." Zeke throws their hands up.
"Fuck dude!" Cal says, biting her lip and thinking.
"We could just play for the joy of winning," Lou suggests.
"Fuck no," Max and Cal say at the same time. We laugh.
"There's got to be some sort of stakes," Cal says.
"We could play strip poker," Parker suggests, his voice husky from his cigarette.
More laughter, hoots and hollers at this. I'm quiet, my heart pounding in my chest. I take a sip of my drink and swallow hard.
"I mean, I'm down. I don't intend to lose," Cal says confidently.
"Of course you are," Max shoots back. "But I'm in too... I'll beat your clothes off."
Even I woop at this. "Shots fired!" I yell.
"Damn, Max," Zeke says. "You sound so confident. Too bad you're gonna lose."
A collective oooohh from the group.
"Nah, all you bitches are gonna lose," Lou declares.
"Um, guys," I begin. "I've... never played poker before." My face flushes, not because I'm embarrassed I've never played poker, but because I'm imagining getting naked in front of my friends, and this whole scenario is turning me on.
"That's all good!" Cal urges. "It's easy. I'll teach you."
"Yeah man, you can do it!" Zeke chimes in.
"Okay," I agree, just to see Cal's beautiful grin light up her face.
We readjust seats so that Cal is sitting next to me and a little thrill goes through me. She leans over and starts explaining the basics of poker, and her cologne smells woodsy and earthy.
"Okay, so everyone is dealt a hand of five cards, and the most valuable hand wins." I try to listen as she explains a royal flush, a straight flush, a flush, a straight, four of a kind, three of a kind, two pair, one pair, no pair.
"When you get your hand, you have the chance to exchange one to three cards, or four if your last card is an ace. Then, because we're not playing with chips, just clothes" - she winks at this - "you can fold if you think you have a bad hand and stay if your hand is worth betting on. Then everyone reveals their hand and the losers take off a piece of clothing."
We discuss as a group what counts as clothing - a pair of socks counts as one piece, a tie does not count as a piece. Lou, who came from work dressed in a full suit, pouts at this.
"Whatever, dude," Zeke says, waving their hands. "You're already wearing the most clothes of all of us."
I laugh nervously, stuck in my own head. I take stock of everything that I'm wearing, bottom to top. Jeans. Boyshorts. Sports bra. Button up. That's it. I have four pieces of clothing. I can lose four times before I'm naked. I take another drink, feeling a throbbing in my core, and I squeeze my legs together. This is veering very close to one of my fantasies, where I'm stripped naked on a table and have my pussy eaten by a group of butches.
"Are you ready?" Cal asks.
I swallow and take a breath. "Yeah, let's do this."
Cal deals everybody a hand and we peer at our cards. I have nothing, and I cautiously fold. Lou loses the round to Max and takes off his suit jacket. I finish off my drink and get up for another one, pausing in the kitchen to catch my breath, trying to will my racing heart to slow down a little.
I sit back down and ask Max to roll another joint. I want to be crossfaded for this. They roll it expertly and pass it down to me. "Thanks," I smile. Max is handsome, with broad shoulders, a wide dopey grin, black curly hair and piercing green eyes. They're another one I've had my eye on. But they're always calling me a pussy and I don't know how to get them to take me seriously.
I light up the joint and take a careful puff, because if I cough Max will call me a pussy again. I pass it to Cal and she takes a puff and passes it off, shuffling the deck and dealing another round. This time I have a pair of queens, and I try to hide my smirk. I have a terrible poker face. I stay.
Lou has three twos, and it beats me. Fuck.
"Strip!" everyone yells, and my face flushes. I stand up, to cheers, and unbutton my shirt, pull it off my shoulders, and reveal my black sports bra. More cheers. I focus on breathing. I toss the shirt on the back of my chair and sit back down. As I sit, my clit rubs against my boyshorts and I try to ignore the feeling.
A couple more rounds pass. Parker and Zeke both take off their shirts. Parker is wearing a sports bra but Zeke isn't, and I try not to stare at their dark brown nipples.
Cal passes us another hand. I have a pair of sevens and decide to risk it against Cal and Max. Max has a pair of tens and Cal has three sixes. That was stupid. I swallow and stand up to unbutton my pants, pulling them down my hips and legs to cheers and jeers from the group. Max pulls their shirt over their head, revealing a binder. My heart is beating out of my chest.
"Fuck," I curse, taking a long swig of my drink.
"Oh, you're doing well for a beginner," Cal praises. "It was good to risk the pair." I sigh.
The next round, I fold. Cal's hand beats Lou's, and he unbuttons his crisp white button-up to reveal a white t-shirt underneath.