Author's note:
This story is a spinoff for my upcoming collaboration with the amazing
AwkwardMD
. Our story has the working title "Grumpy Old Ladies", and it may or may not be called that. Stay tuned! It will be fantastic!
This is also my Summer Lovin' 2021 entry, so please vote. All comments are always very much appreciated.
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"This stupid... fucking... thing!"
Bella threw the offending slips of fabric on the bed, herself on the other bed, and started sobbing. She didn't know if it was more from humiliation, self loathing or embarrassment over her failure to do even this simple thing right; who leaves for a tropical cruise without checking if their swimwear fits?
Lena sighed and Bella could hear her moving in the room.
Not room
, Bella corrected herself.
Cabin
. This wasn't a hotel, this was a boat, designed to take couples on honeymoons and encourage lazy loving by nights and worshipping the sun by days.
"
Why
did we come here?" Bella wailed and punched her pillow. "What are we doing on this boat?"
"Ship," said Lena, her tone annoyingly even. She sat beside Bella on the bed.
"Ship, boat, whatever, what even is the difference?"
Lena sighed again. "You know why. To get your mind off things."
Things
being Bella's husband and his secretary, fifteen years his junior, and recently his new love interest.
"And because the stupid cruise was non-refundable! I know! But I want to get off! This isn't working! We should've let Eli and The Bitch come after all!"
"Want to go by the boutique section and see if they have a bikini for you?"
"
They don't!
No one manufactures swimwear to accommodate these stupid... stupid... udders!"
"Hey, you. Your boobs are fantastic, and you've fed..."
"
Easy for you to say!!!
"
"There is that nudist deckβ"
Bella shrieked and punched the pillow again. Lena let out another sigh, deeper this time. After a moment of silence, she got up from the bed.
"I'll get us something to snack on while we contemplate our options," Lena said. "Okay? I'll be right back."
Bella mumbled something inconclusive. After the door closed behind Lena, she sat up reluctantly and looked for her underwear. She cast a hateful glance at her bikini. She hadn't worn it in a few years, and apparently it had shrunk by at least one cup size since then, if not two.
She was ashamed of her childish tantrum. Then again, Lena had heard her tirades over her voluptuous shape many times over the years. They had been friends for a long, long time, and knew each other's secrets and sore spots.
Bella put her bra back on. The term "lingerie" didn't apply to her underwear. "Lingerie" was flimsy and lightweight. Her udder holster, on the other hand, was industrial strength and practical
equipment
.
She had been curvy and prone to plumpness her whole life, and after having the twins she had gained an extra twenty pounds, most of which, she felt, went straight to her tits. She was now ridiculously top heavy, and even when her hips and bum held a part of that weight, she didn't feel it was enough to balance out her figure.
Of all her friends, Lena represented the body type she would've preferred to be: tall and slim, delicately curvy, the kind who looked good in every single piece of clothing she ever put on. Now in their forties, Lena's boobs sagged slightly if she went without a bra, but even then they sat higher than Bella's.
Bella stood, facing the mirror, and stretched her back, turning sideways and then back.
Maybe it was just that she was so short. It wasn't difficult for one's boobs to stretch to their navel when the distance was nonexistent.
By the time Lena came back with a fruit basket and well chilled champagne, Bella had her summer dress back on and was sitting on the minuscule balcony of their cabin. This was supposed to be her and Eli's twenty years anniversary cruise, and she had opted for more luxury than normally.
Her temper flared again when she remembered how that bitch, Brenda, had helped her with the planning. "Eli will love this!" the devious trump had declared more than once. No doubt she had planned on being the one he would love it
with
. Well, at least Bella had ruined
that
plan by holding on to the tickets, even when Eli had exposed his new relationship conveniently in time to ruin the travel plans.
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Bella couldn't help herself. She burst out laughing at the wide eyed shock on the young woman's face, shattering the stunned silence hovering about their dinner table.
They were assigned to specific tables for the duration of the cruise, and her and Lena's table company consisted of Sue and David, a young couple on their honeymoon. They were stupidly in love, and probably could not imagine life twenty years in their future, certainly not one including adultery. They had talked about their dream wedding, which had taken place just prior to the cruise, and how this was to be the beginning of their wonderful life together.
Then they had asked if Bella and Lena were a couple and how long they'd been together. Bella had said no... and then recounted the whole story. Lena laughed with her, and they leaned against each other, breathless and wiping away the tears.
"That won't happen to you, don't worry," Lena consoled the young couple. They shared a look that said it hadn't even occurred to them it ever could. "Just keep on the same side of the struggle. It's so easy to get lost in the grind."
Sue nodded slowly. To Lena, she said, "You're such a good friend to accompany Bella at this difficult time."
"Yes, it's
such
a burden," Lena said, grinning, and made a show of pressing a palm to her chest and wiping imaginary sweat away from her forehead.
Bella laughed and punched her arm. "Yeah, right, because attending a free luxury cruise is a massive sacrifice!"
The thought stayed with her, though. A few hours later, Bella and Lena sat on the upper deck, enjoying the velvety tropical night. They were drinking cocktails and watching the other couples. Because all of them were couples. As far as Bella could tell, they were the only non-couple onboard. They had seen a fair amount of gay and lesbian couples, some very old and some much younger than them, but absolutely no groups of singles.
"I didn't know it would be quite this couple-y," Bella said, gesturing around the deck with her drink. "I'm sorry."
"Sorry? Why?"
"Well, I thought you maybe wanted to score on this cruise."
Lena turned her large, dark eyes towards her friend and considered her for a long while.
"Because two weeks is such a long time without getting laid, I can't spare to spend it cheering up my best friend?"
Bella shrugged. "Is that why you came? Because you consider me your best friend? What about Shirley or Becky?"
"Hey, Beez," Lena said. Her voice was warm and serious. "I wanted to come. Nowhere I'd rather be than here with you, watching all these fine people smooching the night away. You're my favorite grumpy old lady in the whole wide world."
Bella lowered her gaze and blinked. Maybe she'd had a few too many, but Lena's caring touched her, and the use of her old nickname hit her straight in the feels. That, and their childhood pact to always, always remain best friends, even when they were grumpy old ladies. She nodded, then nodded again.
"Besides," Lena said, "how active do you think my love life is?"
"More active than mine! For a while I thought Eli was developing erectile dysfunction. I had no idea he was just draining his balls into that young cunt."