She was the coolest girl at the party.
She was what I tried to be for other girls, the persona I summoned when I flirted with pretty submissive things that wanted to be lead. To have things done to them and allow their bodies feasted on for pleasure. But I could be submissive too.
I was at my best friends inner city terrace house party, packed with people I didn't know. Church Street Manor they called it. One room had even been cleared out so someone's DJ friend could have a dedicated rave cave. It had the lustre of a club without the grime - well - less of the grime. And if there was grime at least it was ours. I don't really remember how I came to meet her but now we were the only ones left talking, the others had left to empty bladders, smoke or dance. She leant against the kitchen counter in her cool girl way, drinking spiced rum - some foreign label I didn't recognise - straight.
'Is this your first Church Street Manor event?'
'Yeah, and now that I'm here I'm kind of bummed I've only just been invited! Are they usually like this?'
'Yeah usually a solid night but just depends who decides to show up.'
I do my best to give a flirty look to confirm the subtle suggestion and telepathically scream 'please fuck me'.
She stays calm, collected, not giving away anything that might suggest she received my telepathic plea. Cool girl.
'What are you drinking?'
'Fireball and apple juice' I respond sheepishly. Someone had accidentally downed the rest of my drink thinking it was theirs and I managed to scrounge around for the ingredients to a creation I called 'liquid apple pie'. She giggles and I want to die. I want to hold her against me while I kiss her so badly.
'I've never heard of that one. Can I try?'