My heart raced while my mind struggled to catch up. It couldn't be him. I watched as my boyfriend plowed some girl in his living room. I watched his face-that stupid face that he made that drove me nuts when I was the one he was fucking. It was all twisted up as he snarled like he thought he was some badass god of fucking. Really it just made him look pathetic, like he was trying way too hard. Yep. That was him. The last 6 months of my life. Son of a bitch. She wasn't even that cute!
I wiped the tears from my eyes as I ran back to my car, then I tore out of there, my tires squealing behind me. On instinct I started to drive home before I realized it wasn't an option. My parents would be home, probably sitting in the living room watching TV right now. There was no way I could let them see me like this. I had nowhere to go. Another bout of sobs wracked through me as I reached for my cell phone. I called the only person I'd always been able to rely on.
"Hello?"
"Maggie?" My voice sounded weak and I hated it.
"Chrissy? What's wrong?"
I sniffled. I couldn't find the words to tell her just yet. "Are you home? Can I come over?"
"I'm at the store but I can be home in like 15 minutes."
"Ok."
She hesitated. "Can I get you anything while I'm here? Maybe some ice cream?"
I smiled through my tears. She knew me so well. "Black raspberry chip, please. And another half-gallon for yourself."
Maggie laughed. She had this sweet little giggle that always made me smile. "I'll be there soon, hon," she promised softly.
When I got to her apartment, Maggie's car wasn't in the lot so I sat on the steps and waited for her. The tears weren't so heavy now and I pulled out my phone to text my asshole of a soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend. I found his name in my contacts and stared at the screen. I wanted to text him something perfect. It had to be the right amount of aloof, snark, gotcha, and fuck off. But all I could think was why? Had I done something? Had I not done something? I thought he was different. I thought he could make me happy. Instead he went and reminded me why I'd been chronically single for so long.
I still hadn't thought of anything to say when Maggie's car pulled in so I gave up and pocketed my phone. She bounded toward me with two bags and I grabbed one as she pulled me into a hug. I held her and fought off the tears that threatened to return.
"You ok?" she softly spoke in my ear.
"No," I answered honestly. "But can we go inside to talk about it?"
Once we were inside, Maggie walked straight to the kitchen, then emerged with the ice cream and two spoons. There were no bowls; this was a straight-out-of-the-carton kind of night.
"Can we watch something for a little bit?" I asked.
"What do you want to watch?"
I thought about it. My go-to was usually romantic comedy, but that sure as hell wasn't happening tonight.
"Something scary," I answered. "I want to watch happy people die."
Maggie raised her eyebrows but didn't respond. She pulled something off the shelf and put it in the DVD player. I didn't really care what it was. We'd watched most of her movies together and she knew what I liked.
Maggie sat beside me on the couch and we dug in as the movie began to play.
It wasn't five minutes into the movie before I spoke. "Mike is cheating on me."
Maggie looked at me. "I'm sorry, sweetie. Are you sure?"
I nodded. "When I say he is cheating on me, present tense, I mean literally right now, this very second, he's fucking some blonde on his couch. He said he couldn't go out tonight because he was sick so I stopped by to check on him on my way home from work. Unless she has a magical healing pussy, I'm pretty sure he's a lying sack of shit."
Maggie didn't say anything. Sometimes there was nothing to say, so she just listened.
"It's not like I was in love with him," I continued. "I don't even think I'm upset at losing him in particular. It's just..." I struggled to fight back the tears, but they came anyway and my voice cracked as I spoke. "Why doesn't anyone love me? Ever?"
"Oh, honey." Maggie grabbed the ice cream from me and placed it on the table before wrapping me in her arms. She held me as I sobbed into her shoulder. "Just because Mike is a scumbag doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. He didn't deserve you."
"No," I shook my head, still clinging to my best friend. "Because it's not just him. Everyone leaves me. Men hate me."
"Men are idiots," Maggie responded fiercely.
She wiped a tear from my cheek "Look at me." I sniffled before glancing up.
She was so cute when she was protective. Her messy black curls stuck out at all ends of her ponytail. Her brown eyes were intense, yet loving. She had half a dozen tattoos and several piercings that made her look like a gorgeous badass, though some of the ink was humorous so it was evident she didn't take herself too seriously. Sometimes next to her I felt so plain. My auburn hair was wavy on the best of days, but usually was so frizzy and unruly I just threw it up in a bun. My green eyes were pretty enough, and I had a decent smile but I just didn't really feel like I stood out.
Looking into Maggie's eyes now I wished for probably the billionth time during the course of our relationship that she'd see me as more than a friend. Maggie was bisexual but I'd always gotten the feeling that she preferred men since she always had a boyfriend. She never stayed single long enough for me to really test the waters. I had always been curious about girls, but never liked one well enough to actually do anything about it. It would probably have been bad for our friendship anyway, and I couldn't bear to risk losing her. But nobody else really got me the way she did.
"Christina Marie, you are an amazing woman. You're crazy smart, you're funny, loyal, kind, and you're fucking beautiful!" She reached out and tucked a loose hair behind my ear. "Anyone would be lucky have you. You're the most lovable person I've ever known."
"I know you love me," I said. "And I know my family loves me. I know I'm not alone-alone." I paused to take a breath. "But it's not the same." I looked down and added "I want someone to love me romantically. But apparently that's too much to ask."
Maggie lifted my chin until I was staring into her eyes again. "I stand by my statement."
I sighed. "I know, I know. I'll meet someone eventually. I'm just tired of dating assholes. How many frogs do I have to kiss before I find someone decent?"
Maggie chuckled. "That's not what I meant."
I looked at her, confused.
She rolled her eyes. "For the love of-" Maggie grabbed the back of my neck and pulled my lips to hers. This was definitely not a best friend kind of kiss. Her lips were soft but hungry. I felt her tongue flick across my lip, and heard a moan escape from the back of my throat. I didn't even think about it. I returned her kiss with equal fervor, my tongue gliding over hers. She suckled my bottom lip and I felt it all through my body.
Maggie quickly pulled away and shifted away from me on the couch. She spoke before I could protest. "I know you aren't really into girls, but I hate that you think you're unlovable. Because it's not true."
I didn't know what to say. It was Maggie who wouldn't look at me now and she fidgeted with her hands in her lap. I'd never seen her this nervous before. My heart swelled at the sight. "Just...if you ever want to try out the other team..." Her eyes finally met my own. They were filled with hope and uncertainty. "I know someone who loves you. Really loves you. The way you want to be loved."
Tears filled my eyes again, but this time they were the good kind. Maggie misread them. She looked down at her hands again and stammered anxiously. "I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking-" This time I lifted her chin. I cupped her cheek with the same hand and grinned through my tears as I looked into those beautiful, albeit nervous as hell, brown eyes. I pulled her closer to me, and kissed her. I tried to feed all of my love, all of the unexplored feelings I'd harbored for her all these years, into this one kiss.
Her arms circled my waist as she responded. The anxiety fled and passion poured from us in its place. My tongue plunged into her mouth and explored with urgency. I felt my breathing grow heavier. My teeth sought out her lower lip and she whimpered when I nibbled on it. Her arms tightened, pulling me against her.
My shirt bunched up between her hands and I felt her fingers graze the bare skin of my waist. Shivers ran through me at her touch. I needed more. I pulled away to look at her, my best friend. I didn't even remember the man who had betrayed me a mere hour before. He didn't matter now. He'd never mattered, really. I was coming to realize that he'd just been a place holder for the love that sat before me now.
Maggie and I were breathing hard and couldn't help but smile. She laughed just then and it was her laugh that did it. That sweet, adorable giggle that I'd always loved so much convinced me that there was no going back.
I slowly gathered the bottom of my shirt and pulled it over my head. I was so nervous for her to see me, which was ridiculous. We'd changed in front of each other a million times before. But this was different. I needn't have worried, though. I watched the amusement in eyes turn to lust as she stared at my breasts, covered only by a layer of red lace. Thank god I'd put on a good bra tonight! My breasts were probably the one (well, two) features that I knew were definitely not plain. I have really great tits. DD cups that were somehow still perky. Maggie had complimented them before, but my body still thrilled to watch her lick her lips as she reached for them.
"Ahhhh," I sighed when her soft fingers found my nipples through the lace. As Maggie kneaded my breasts, pinching and pulling my nipples, I rolled my head back with a gasp. She took that opportunity to kiss my exposed neck. "Maggie," I mumbled in my pleasure-filled haze.
She trailed soft kisses up my neck until she was nibbling on my earlobe. "You like that?" She whispered in my ear, the soft timbre of her voice dripping with seduction. I'd told her once that my ears were sensitive spots for me. Seemed that she remembered.
"God yes," I exhaled.
She giggled again and flicked her tongue across my earlobe and I couldn't take it anymore. I reached for Maggie's shirt and ripped it over her head. I reached up with both hands and pushed her shoulders gently, but forcefully until she was laying on the couch. Then I climbed on top, straddling her.
