What's this I hear that you've not read the earlier chapters yet? If you try and read this chapter without reading the earlier ones, you'll be lost. But don't worry, we can have the Coast Guard help you navigate back to the beginning, and you can start there.
There's an important character under the age of eighteen in this story. It's sort of hard to write a story about a young single mom and not have her munchkin in it. But don't worry, when we get to the adult playtime parts, the little one will be safely tucked in her own bed and sleeping while the grownups play. These are responsible adults after all.
Chapter Six
Jennifer
It took me a moment to figure out where I was when I awoke. I smelled the lavender and felt an arm draped over me, then snuggled back into her. Flashes of the previous night started to play through my head, my heart raced. I was thankful for not being alone.
Minutes later a blurry eyed little girl came into the bedroom and snuggled up with me. She was snuggled up with her doll, I was snuggled up with her, and Whitney with me. For a brief moment, everything was right with the world. Then reality reared its head, and I remembered all that had happened the night before. I tried to process what I had experienced, but I was overwhelmed at the moment.
I slipped out from between my girls, and after taking care of the morning necessities I padded down to the kitchen. Finding some pancake mix, I began to mix up a large batch. There was enough to feed a small army when Whit and Madi came downstairs, but shortly, all that was left was an empty platter.
"Mommy?" A tired, timid voice broke my train of thought.
"Yes, pumpkin?"
"What are we going to do now?"
"I'm not sure honey, we'll figure something out." We always did, but the little bit in my checking account and my small emergency fund were not going to go that far.
"Are we going to have to go back to the shelter Mommy?"
"I don't know pumpkin, we'll figure something out."
"Could we just stay here? And live with Miss Whitney?"
I heard Whit make another cup of coffee in her Keurig and sit down at the table across from me. She reached out and took my hand.
"Hey, look at me. You're not alone. I want to help you."
"Thanks, I know you do. I just don't want to be a burden to you."
"Jennifer! You're not a burden to me. You never will be."
"That's okay, as soon as we can get on our feet, Madison and I will figure something out."
"Jenn, I -- oh never mind." I watched her get up from the table with her coffee and stare out the window.
I was thinking about talking to her more when I realized I needed to get Madison dressed. "Come pumpkin, let's go get your new clothes out of the dryer and see what you can fit into." I took her hand and led her upstairs. We pulled the clothes out and laid them out on the guest bed. Some were too small and others clearly too big for her. But there were a couple of items she could wear right away. There were also a pair of pink sneakers that she could use. They were a tad large, but something she could grow into.
"Hey."
I turned around, and Whit was standing in the doorway.
"I figured we need to get you to a store to do some shopping, and the clothes you had on yesterday smell of smoke. I pulled out some sweats that will fit you. If you want, that is."
"Pumpkin," I said turning to Madi, "Why don't you go down and watch some TV and play with Skipper while I get ready." Madi skipped out of the room, and I followed Whit to her room.
Whit had a few items out on the bed for me to try. I opted for some gray sweatpants, a tee shirt, and a hoodie. Slipping into a pair of her flip-flops, which were so not my thing, I sat on the bed staring at my feet. I was trying to figure out how I was going to get back on my feet when Whit joined me.
"Are you doing okay?" The look of concern was evident on her face.
"I don't know. I'm just so overwhelmed right now. Thoughts about everything I have to replace are swirling around my head. Just to get some new clothing is going to blow out my meager savings. Let alone everything else. I can't even think of how I'm going to get a new apartment. Do you know how lucky I was to find that place? Cheap places in this city are rare."
I began to pace back and forth in the kitchen as I continued my rant. "How am I going to come up with a new deposit and last month's rent? I'm sure ain't going to get anything from my last place with that slumlord. Ugh, I'm probably going to have to move to Lynnwood or Kent and commute in. And the bus options to our office are limited. Then what do I do with Madison? Find daycare close to my place and pay for a couple more hours of care or make her ride the bus with me. Although if she rode with me in the car we could use the carpool lane..."
"Jenn--" I watched as Whit started to speak a couple times and then stop herself. "I'd like to help you. Can I at least take you and Madison shopping? Help you buy some new clothes and stuff?"
"You sure about this? I don't want to be a burden on you. You're not obligated to help me."
"Do you remember what you called me last night?"
"What do you mean?"
"What you told the Red Cross lady."
"That you're my girlfriend."
"Right, and what does that mean? To you?"
"That you're my best friend, that I love you, and I don't want to lose you." I said and wondered where she was going with this.
"Right, but it's more. Being in a relationship is more than just having sex with someone. It's about doing life together, helping each other. I'd like to help you because I care about you. If you'll let me."
"I don't know."
"You don't?" Whit's voice was barely audible.
"I don't know if I have a choice." This was the only path I could see to getting Madison and me back to where we were.
"You do, I'm not trying to force you or anything."
"I know, thanks." I sniffled and then felt arms wrap around me and pull me into her. I was trying hard not to, but I lost it. I just started to blubber. Whit held me and gave me reassurances while I let my emotions pour out.
Mustering the willpower from I don't know where, I sat back up on my own and began to wipe the tears with the sleeve of the sweatshirt I had on. As I finished up, I looked at the brunette sitting next to me on the bed. Our eyes locked, and she smiled at me. I closed my eyes and leaned my head in. My lips found hers, and for a moment I felt normal again.
"I missed that," I heard her whisper.
"Me too."
"We should probably get going; we have a lot to do today."
A few minutes later we were walking back to my old place, with each of us holding one of Madison's hands.
"Hang on, before we get in the Jeep, I want to see if I can look around at all." I walked towards my apartment. I explained who I was. Once the police officer who was monitoring the scene had verified my name she let me cross the barricade tape into what was left of my place. Whitney found a dry patch of grass, and Madi snuggled into her lap while I went in.
It didn't take but a moment to figure out that not much had survived and was worth rescuing. I found my cell phone in the corner in a small pool of standing water. It was mostly intact, but I'm sure it was fried inside.
Entering our bedroom, I was glad I was alone. On Madi's bed was what was left of her Anna doll. It wasn't a pretty sight. The plastic face was melted, and the synthetic clothing burned. Looking around our bedroom, there was nothing salvageable. A picture frame that once held a picture of my mom holding Madison right after she was born was scorched. All that was left was Madison's face. I guess you could say it was a summary of my life until now. Everything was gone except her.
And Whitney. She was standing there next to me, holding out my purse. I looked out the window and the police officer was now sitting with Madi. My purse was rather battered, but looked in one piece. I found the twenty-eight dollars I had in there, charred, but still intact. My debit card was melted a bit and warped, no longer usable. My driver's license was also deformed, but you could still make out my face a bit and my name on it.
"You can get those bills replaced at the bank when you ask for a new debit card." Whit said to me. "Until then, I got you. Anything else you want to look at here?"
"No." I picked up the picture fragment and the Anna doll, along with my purse and busted cell phone, and started to head for the door. I held the door open for Whit, and then instinctively went to lock it.
Then I realized the futility of my effort. Instead of following the others, I found myself sitting on the stoop holding Madison's doll. My fingers began to follow the melt lines on the face, tracing the blobs of plastic.
"Mommy?"
I looked up at my baby girl.
"You're crying Mommy. Are you going to be okay?"
Leave it my little one to pick up on her mom's emotions. "Yeah, Mommy's just sad."
"I'm sad too." She sat next to me and took her doll from my hand. I could see tears streaming down her face. I couldn't begin to guess how she was processing what she'd been through, but we'd likely be talking about it for a long time. "It's okay Anna, I'll get you fixed." As she hugged what was left of her doll, her mop of hair fell over her face, and I could hear her sob.
"Why Mommy? Why did this happen? Did I do something wrong? Is it my fault?"
"No pumpkin. You didn't do anything wrong. None of us did. Sometimes bad things happen. And we just have to deal with it."
