I've told you about the messing around at college and of the 3somes with Sharon. Shortly after that episode with her I met the man that eventually became my husband, Kevin.
Then, apart from the occasional half joking suggestion usually made in a club by a girl of, "fancy a snog" and a couple of strongish come-ons by senior managers in the ad agency I joined after leaving university half way through my second year I had no more such experiences for many years. I then told you a rather long story.
I went to live with Kevin much to the consternation of my parents. Almost ten years older than me he was so sophisticated and worldly wise, humorous and glamorous and loving and just sheer sexy that for almost ten years I had no thoughts for others let alone the rather twilight world of other women. During that time I can honestly say that I was never tempted nor even thought of anything with another man and certainly not with a woman. We married when I was in my early twenties had Sarah shortly after and life was wonderful.
But things change. As do men and as do husbands. And Kevin was no exception. I almost died the first time I found out that he had been unfaithful. My world was at an end, I thought, and only Sarah pulled me through. But we made up, "it was just a one off, she means nothing to me," he explained. She probably didn't but it wasn't a one off for several years later I found out again. We parted but that was awful. I still loved him as did Sarah. We went back together but things were not the same particularly sex. I could not just fancy him the way I had and I shut him out. I found out what a "headache" is and I developed different tiredness times to him.
I was probably at my lowest then. My most susceptible and my most emotionally vulnerable. He had often in the throes of sexual passion said that he would like to see me with another woman. I'd told him about Louise and Sally at college and Sharon and the threesomes, as I had told him about everything before we met. After all my commitment to him was total and he deserved to know everything.
Over the years he'd often asked what it felt like when I was with them and describing it to him made him ultra frisky. As our ardour, well at least mine, declined so his interest in them and in seeing me with another woman increased. I told him not to be daft but he kept on. The pressure increased just as my depression deepened. He accompanied it with terms like, "it's just what we need to rekindle our love Mandy," and "it will get us back to what we were." I continued to refuse and he included threats to leave us. That I could not envisage. That I could not do to Sarah who absolutely and quite rightly adored him. He even said, "you've been there before do it again, for me."
Eventually I became worn down and agreed. "Who though?" I asked desperately hoping we'd be unable to think of anyone. "Jenny down the pub," he said mentioning a girl that sometimes joined us at the pub we went to most Wednesday evenings. Jenny was an actress who often entertained us with outrageous tales of the goings on behind the scenes and after hours at the theatres and TV studios she worked in. She had absolutely no inhibitions at all and talked very openly about her sexual exploits giving very strong hints that she might well be fairly bi. "No one in show biz knows what the hell they are," she'd said once. A few years younger than me but almost certainly not the youthful age she claimed, she was single but had had a host of partners and made claims to having had, "far more than I can count," lovers. Tall, around 5 feet nine she had a dancers figure with long legs and a very supple body but Quite pretty but certainly no beauty in my eyes she had a rather hard looking face with quite thin lips and small eyes. Clearly knowing though how to make the best of make up, her longish blonde hair, that she usually wore down with a slight frizz to the tresses and her lithe long-legged figure, she always looked dramatically glamorous and, I suppose, fairly available. Despite this I had never heard any rumours in the village about her going with anyone from nearby but several times she was seen in local restaurants with women who presumably stayed at her flat overnight. Hence there was a fair amount of goodhearted speculation about her sexuality
On balance I thought that Kevin had made a good choice from an availability viewpoint but the thought of it still did nothing sexually for me and I was really dreading it should it happen. "Do you think you could ask her?" he flabbergasted me by asking. That was the limit and we had a blazing row with me telling him that I had changed my mind and that he could "fuck off if he wanted." This went on for a few days during which his manipulation was at its most extreme and effective. Inevitably I suppose I once more agreed that I would do it but that I didn't think I could ask her.
In his own indomitable way Kevin solved the dilemma. She came into the pub a couple of Wednesdays later talking, as usual, about her latest adventures and sexual exploits in the theatre. "Well just the producer and leading man" she replied to someone's query as to whether she had got lucky. "Oh messed around with the leading lady as well of course, got to keep in with the power brokers hasn't a girl?" she beamed at us completely unabashed.
Kevin managed to get the three of us alone at one end of the bar and cleverly turned the conversation around to rather saucy matters asking her about her exploits. This went on for a while with her and him becoming ever more open and then, right out of the blue , he came out with, "You know Jen, I reckon you could help an old married couple rekindle the spark in their marriage couldn't you?" She made some witty response ending with "any couple in mind Kev?" Laughing he said, "well I bet you can guess can't you?" She looked at both of us and went on, "close to home are they?" "Yes very," he replied moving if anything closer to her as she said, "what did you have in mind?"
I could hardly believe what was happening as he went on very boldly with what seemed to be the bombshell, "I've always wanted to see my wife with another woman?" There was silence as Jenny's gaze slowly went from Kevin, to me and back again. It seemed to me as though she was thinking about it and I was rather hoping she'd say no and go off in a huff. She took a sip of her drink as she once more looked at me and back to him before saying softly, "mmm might be fun, is it OK with you Mandy?" I could hardly breathe let alone reply so, like a fool, I just nodded and covered my embarrassment by putting the glass to my lips. Things then progressed quite quickly and it was arranged that the three of us would have lunch on Sunday at the pub then go back to our house which was just a short walk away.
I hardly thought of anything else between then and Sunday and several times I tried to talk Kevin out of it but there was no way that he was going to agree so my destiny was set for Sunday. My feelings about going with Jenny were very mixed. The actual thought of being with a woman, funnily enough, was not as daunting as I thought of it as I would have imagined it would be. My mind went back to what I had experienced with the girls and there was a sort of calmness with my views on the physical aspect of it. It was the emotional side and the fact that Kevin so wanted me to do something that he knew I would rather not do that was the main concern. As was his refusal to fully answer whether he would want to join in. "I don't know if I would want to or whether I would prefer to just watch the two of you two," he said very non-committal. I wanted to ask what he would do if he did join in but I guess I was scared of the answer so I didn't.
