Fall, 1967
‘Remember to study the notes from chapter five, because there will be a quiz on Monday,’ I’m making a futile attempt to project my voice as my students noisily file out of the room. I watch them as they leave, wondering how they’ll actually spend their respective weekends, and how many of them will actually study anything before Monday morning. I notice that one student lingers, Jeffrey Wilson.
‘Miss Logan, could you explain the assignment to me again? I want to make sure I got it right, so when my Mom asks, I won’t look stupid.’
He leans in close to me as I’m explaining the instructions, his dark arm almost touching my pale, freckled one.
‘Is that better?’ I look up at him.
‘Well, there’s just this one part here that I still don’t get…’
Mr. Martin, a teacher from down the hall, enters the room. ‘Boy, don’t you know that it’s Friday? Get your ass out of here. Go on, get!’
Jeffrey rushes out as Mr. Martin playfully swats at him with a folded newspaper.
‘You didn’t have to do that, Marty,’ I complain, as he locks the door, pulling the shade down.
‘He’s starting to make me jealous. He was awfully close to you, you know…’ he stares down at me, stroking his goatee. ‘Makes me wonder if my ‘fro isn’t big enough…’
‘Don’t be silly, Marty,’ I blush, admiring the way his black turtleneck accents his mocha colored skin.
He pulls me to him, kissing me, gradually backing me into the chalkboard.
‘Not here,’ I complain. ‘Remember I had chalk all over my back, last time.’
‘Well, pick a place. Hurry up, because I’ll have to get to going in a few.’
I choose the desk, our normal place to get a quick fuck before leaving school.
‘My dick’s been hard all day, thinking about you in this wild-assed miniskirt. You got on panties under there?’
‘Of course, I do,’ I reach down to take them off, handing them over to him.
‘I bet you give the boys wet dreams. They’re probably all rushing home right now to jack off to visions of Miss Logan in her brown mini. How many clumsy fellas did you have today? I bet they were dropping pencils every two seconds…’
‘Marty, don’t be obscene…’ I kiss him, rubbing my hand over the tent in his crotch.
He raises my panties to his face, inhaling my scent and noting the dampness of the cloth, before placing them on the desk. He motions for me to turn around, leaning me across the desktop while he unzips his pants. He’s behind me, but I can still picture his long black cock as he strokes it, preparing to put it in me.
He gropes me first, pulling my shirt up so that he can fondle my breasts. He slaps my ass cheeks until they sting, then soothes me by rubbing his cock head along my slit, spreading my wetness around before he plunges in. He’s grunting already, working for a quick cum, because he’s running late for his second job tutoring at a nearby church. His dick is consistently hitting my spot, making the sensual pressure build at a furious pace. I cum with a gasp; my pussy grips his dick, and my body shudders with pleasure.
I know what he wants now. He’s been stewing all day, staring at me from across the table in the teachers’ lounge as he playfully flirted with Miss Jackson, admiring her new afro. He’ll probably be fucking her, too, in a few weeks, but I wouldn’t care. As long as he still comes to me every Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday night, I don’t care about what he does with the rest of his time. He’ll probably want to ram it into my ass, right here in school, as I lean across my desk. Marty gets a real kick out of that; he says that his wife won’t let him do it to her, so of course, he can’t get enough of it when he’s with me.
He’s priming my ass now, fucking my pussy again, but with a finger slipped into my anus. I can’t help remembering the first time I’d ever done this; that night in Mississippi, five years ago, in the backseat of John’s car. John had been gentle with it; I guess he should have been, since it was my first time. Marty’s never gentle, though; I always seem to have bruises when I leave him. He’s not abusive; he's just exuberant.
He pushes in unmercifully, making me squeal, a reaction that never fails to make his cock jump. His hands are sliding over my triangle, his long fingers teasing my clit. He’s moaning now, almost sounding cartoonish, going wild over the tightness of my ass.
‘Oohhh, your shit is so fucking tight, girl. Ah, ah…’ he moans in a strange falsetto, making me giggle.
I know that I can bring him home, now. I start squeezing him, working my anal muscles, stroking his cock to a climax.
‘Oh, fuck…oh, God!’ His cock spurts into me, making a hot, sticky mess of us.
He pulls out, panting, wiping his cock with a handkerchief. He kneels down to kiss both my ass cheeks, before fixing his clothes, and grabbing his paper.
‘So I’ll see you later tonight, right?’ he asks.
‘Yes, of course. The key’s in its usual place,’ I stand up, walking him to the door so that I can lock it behind him.
---
I still dream about him. I’ve been wondering, all this time, where he is, and if I’ll ever see him again. I thought that I’d be able to forget about John, and move on, but I haven’t. He’s always in my thoughts, and stubbornly, I keep imagining my future life with him in it.
I haven’t seen him since the night that he drove me to Memphis, after Wade kicked me out. I went crazy with worry, wondering if someone would kill him before he managed to make it to safety, feeling incredible guilt about all of the damage that I’d caused. I caught a train back to New York, refusing to see my parents until my wounds healed. I still have a scar on my temple, from when Wade knocked me into the corner of the table, but it’s faded now, only visible up close.
I moved to New York, permanently, taking a job teaching in a high school in Harlem. I rent an apartment in the Village, and the daily trip uptown is like traveling to a different world. I had a hard time of it at first, but once the students, all of them black or Puerto Rican, discovered that I wasn’t afraid of them, they grew to like me. Many of the teachers are suspicious of me, most of them expecting me to be condescending and elitist. Mr. Martin was immediately cordial and welcoming, surprisingly so, considering his militant appearance and his brash manner.
When I first came back to New York, I’d tried to find someone to distract me from my painful memories of Wade and John, someone new and different. I’ve had horrible luck with men, quickly losing interest with most of the guys that I dated. I thought of my lingering feelings for John, and I figured that I just had a fascination with black men, so I roamed the Village from week to week, seeking out any decent looking black guy who’d take me to bed. This tactic didn’t work out, either; I was almost at my wit’s end when I finally decided to take Marty up on the offer of a few drinks one Friday night.
He said that he’d known there was something different about me; I was much too comfortable in my situation, and he was curious to find out what my story was. I didn’t tell him much, but I told him enough to satisfy his curiosity. He told me up front that he was married; his wife didn’t like sex, and he thought that she was really a lesbian, who just hadn’t yet realized it. He told me that he was attracted to me; that he’d never thought of being with a white woman, but I intrigued him because I was different. I took everything he said with a grain of salt; I still do, but I was so lonely and horny, that I took him to my apartment with me after just one drink.