Edited by: Sixty-nine
We were only friends. We worked together and found out we had compatible natures. If she had been white, I would have asked her out. If I had been black, she would have accepted.
I certainly had nothing against black women. I found them very sexy and typically, while not always, more sassy and self-assured than white women. I'd always thought the whole race thing was over-emphasized, not that it didn't play a role in my fantasies. I've always had this thing for exotic women.
Rachelle was a "righteous sister," as she called herself. She always downed black men who thought they looked better with a white woman, especially a blonde, on their arms.
Going through a magazine, she'd often say with heated agitation, "Why is it always these skinny, little white girls with their big-haired blonde selves that our men want to parade around with when they think they've finally made it? Why can't a brother be proud of a fine, black woman on his arm? Answer me that."
"Couldn't tell you, babe," I'd usually reply, then if we were out of everyone else's earshot, I'd often add, "maybe its that nice, wide plump ass your women have."
"Shit, you love this ass! I've seen you looking at it enough."
And I guess I did in a completely casual, totally friendly, obsessive sort of way. Rachelle never took that personal though, because I looked at every woman's ass and often made suggestive comments, once I knew she wouldn't take me seriously.
"Nice hips on that one," I'd say as we walked through the mall on the way to getting something for a quick lunch.
"Too skinny," she'd reply, no doubt because it was a white girl.
"Nothing wrong with skinny, either, once you're horizontal."
"Larry, it's been so long since you been horizontal with a woman you'd take anything."
"That's true, babe, but a man can still have his dreams."
Sometimes when we were eating at the food court together, she'd get disgusted and throw down her napkin. "She's looking at us again."
"Let her look, Rachelle. It's just ignorance. Any fool could see that a gorgeous sista' like you wouldn't be involved with a geeky, whitebread like me."
"It still pisses me off," she'd mutter low and under her breath. "When is it going to be when two people can eat together and not be gawked at?"
"Preach on, girl!" I'd say in friendly mockery. "Power to the people, and all that shit! You want some more soda? I'm gonna get a refill."
"You are one geeky cracker," she said, bursting into a fit of girlish laughter. "'Power to the people?' Shit, I haven't heard that in ten years. You been watching VH1 again or something?"
We worked in the same small department of the company. Our schedules were coordinated and often we'd have to work on heavy projects together. That meant a lot of face time one-on-one. It hadn't taken us more than six months or so to start falling into the easygoing banter between us. After a couple of years, we were beyond the point where we had to worry about stepping on toes.
"You know that's bullshit," she'd tell me in her frank manner that I had come to appreciate.
"No, really, it would sound better if this paragraph goes first and then this one."
"That's the same fuckin', EuroCentric, linear thinking crap they taught you in college, Larry. Break the mold, baby! Write something different for a change to go with this spicy graphic! Why do I slave so hard so that white boys like you can just dumb down my work with "See Jane run!"
"See, that's just your prejudice talking," I'd smile back at her. "You'd never appreciate any writer, even if Denzel wrote your copy."
"Not true, little brother," she'd say, Rachelle's highest compliment. "The forever righteous Mr. Denzel Washington studied journalism at Fordham before he took up acting. Man can write, now."
Rachelle had seen every Denzel Washington movie ever made. She even personally dragged my white ass (as she put it) to see "Malcolm X" when it was out. Anytime I wanted to get a rise out of her, all I had to do was "dog" Denzel.
"Besides," she'd say all dreamy eyed, "A fine man like Denzel wouldn't be just writing words in this little ol' office."
"Sure he would," I'd cackle at her. "He's happily married, remember."
"Of course, he is," she'd say indignantly. "To a fine woman, too. A fine, black woman!"
Then, she'd throw my words back at me. "Still, a girl can have her dreams."
One fateful, slow Friday afternoon, Rachelle came back from lunch at the mall by herself. I'd been delayed because I had one last deadline to make and she was supposed to pick me up a Subway sandwich while she was there. I'd finished up the offending copy and e-mailed it to the printer just as my office mate came storming back into the room, clearly pissed off.