Three days later, I was frustrated beyond belief. What little sleep I got was restless. I picked at my meals. I could hardly stand the sight of Tolem, and he was always there! We spoke few words to each other and when we did, our tone was terse.
Prince Irial had picked up on the tension, and the fact that I was less than willing to be wooed by him and left the day after the state dinner.
"Good riddance," I growled when Trilla informed me that he and his entourage had taken off after breakfast without so much as a "by your leave."
Trilla stared at me a moment, gave a sharp nod and went back to her office.
Something told me Trilla was out of sorts, but I couldn't bring myself to ask her about her issues since I had issues of my own.
I woke up on day four and began crying as soon as my eyes opened. Tolem must have been in my sitting room because he was on the bed beside me as my first sob escaped.
Gathering me into his arms, he whispered against my hair as I sobbed on his shoulder.
"I don't think I can handle it," I muttered. "You are doing a wonderful job as queen," he assured me.
I shook my head. "No, I can't handle you leaving."
"I'm not leaving."
I pulled out of his grip so I could meet his blue eyes. "You will."
He swallowed.
"If the decision is against us getting married, you're going to leave."
"I would have to leave," he finally admitted. My tears flowed harder.
"I love you," he whispered, pulling me tighter against him.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and sniffled. "I love you too."
"If I leave, you will go on. You will find another, worthy of you, and you will love him."
I shook my head again. "I wouldn't...I couldn't...my family history proves that we're all too stubborn to accept second best."
Tolem chuckled and kissed my temple. "You certainly are stubborn."
"Shut up," I growled.
"Would you like to get dressed and make an appearance at breakfast?" His large hand smoothed my bed head.
I swatted his hand. "No."
"Breakfast in bed, then?"
"No," I groaned. "I have to go downstairs...I don't want Ella to know what's going on."
Tolem opened his mouth, but I put my hand over it. "I know she's intuitive and she's picked up on my stress levels and the tension, but I will continue to pretend that I'm not about to go stir crazy, so she won't be under any undo stress."
He nodded. "I'll wait for you to dress."
Breakfast was Irish oatmeal baked with blueberries and apples. It was delicious, as usual. I tried to keep up with polite conversation, but I was obviously distracted.
Lady Ilyn had to call my name to get my attention twice.
Just as Miri took away my bowl, Trilla hurried into the dining room. The look on her face was so serious I immediately shot to my feet. My dining chair teetered behind me, but didn't fall. I wouldn't have cared if it did.
"Your majesty," Trilla said, practically running up to me. She clutched a cream-colored envelope in one hand. I could see the red seal was broken and she held a letter in the other hand.
"Trilla," I answered. My hands shook and my heart started to hammer out of control.
Lady Ilyn, my mother, and Ella all sat silent, staring at Trilla. I was getting so much nervous energy off them; I thought I was going to hyperventilate at any moment. Even Miri had frozen; my bowl suspended halfway between the dining table and the tray in her other hand. Tolem took a step forward.
"When would you like the ceremony performed?" Trilla asked, a beautiful grin spreading across her face.
I wanted to scream, and cry again. I wanted to jump up and down and hug each and every person in that room. Instead I just let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding and said, "Yesterday."
"Thank heavens," my mother exclaimed. She and Lady Ilyn grasped each others hands and grinned. Ella launched out of her chair and ran to hug me around my waist. I pulled her into my arms and kissed her face.
Tolem took another step forward and took the letter from Trilla's hand.
"It says, the amendment is effective immediately," his voice was ragged.
I met his gaze and for a moment he hesitated. He looked down at the letter again, as if he couldn't believe what he'd read and had to check again to make sure. He tossed the paper aside and before it hit the floor, Ella and I were in his arms.
It was the best hug I'd ever gotten.
"I guess it's finally time to plan a wedding!" I heard my mother say.
***
I've already admitted to being bad at shopping, but now I knew that I was ten times worse at wedding planning. After breakfast, my mother, Lady Ilyn, Ella and I piled into Trilla's office. The three women chattered happily about flowers, dresses, venues, and food. My mind was occupied with other things, well...one other thing. Sex with Tolem. His resolve was unshakable and I knew he would keep his word about us not sleeping together again until we were married. Now that I knew for sure we were going to actually get married, I wanted him even more.
"Your majesty," Trilla called, bringing me out of my dirty thoughts.
"Yes?"
"What would you like?"
I looked at all the faces around the room, all staring at me expectedly. "I would like to be married before the end of the week. I don't care what I wear; I don't care if it's inside or outside. I want it to happen soon and I want the entire kingdom to celebrate this momentous occasion because this is the only time I'm getting married."
Trilla gave me a small smile. "Your majesty, we will arrange the most spectacular wedding celebration this kingdom has ever seen.