As a young, recent MBA-Grad, it was with no small excitement that I took my first overseas job when the opportunity presented itself. An exciting role, with an exciting "ex-pat package", made the decision to move to China very easy.
As a consultant, my new job was extremely demanding, but very exciting. Fortunately, my remuneration was ample, and so I found myself, when not working at my 7AM to 9PM job, at home in a spacious and luxurious apartment with a beautiful view of the skyline of downtown Shanghai.
While the views were good, and the work exciting, my love life really was non-existent. Not one for dating inside the office, and having really poor Chinese, my spare time not spent in the gym or at work, was dedicated to sitting around, watching DVD's on my leather couch by myself.
So while I was occasionally lonely, it really wasn't a big deal. Young, feeling rich, feeling competent at my job, and excited about my future...I didn't mind. But that's not to say I didn't let my imagination wander. The most common object of my daydreaming was the young woman who came to my apartment to clean it, Lin. I've always found my cleaning lady to be beautiful, if in an unconventional way. To my tastes, too many women in China are rail-thin, anemic, a trait arising from some cultural expectation that beautiful women can't be robust, can't appear to do manual labor. They often wear absurd push-up bras, in a completely false attempt to appear fertile and desirable despite their small tiny frames. Lin, hailing from the country-side, and having already had a child, was an exception. With reddish cheeks, actual curves from lingering pregnancy-fat, and a beautiful smile, I had often felt guilty for just looking at her too long, knowing that she had a husband and child, and cognizant of the fact that I was her employer. I was always careful not to leer, but I definitely got caught gazing a few times.
Despite my cheeky peeks, Lin seemed to enjoy the work, and was always very cheerful while at my apartment. Perhaps it was the high pay for limited labor, but after a few months I felt like we had established a good working rapport.
One week, Shanghai was hit with a tremendous and seemingly unending rain storm, with flooding occurring in every low-lying area around town. Knowing that Lin and her family lived in first floor apartment in one of the flooded neighborhoods; I called and offered her and her family my spare bedroom. At first embarrassed to accept it, I had my secretary call and convince Lin that it really was not a problem, and that I would feel absolutely horrible if she didn't let me help. I also offered to pay for a hotel, but accepting money was a larger affront to her pride, so in the end, after several days of water rising, she, her husband, and her daughter finally accepted my offer. The discrepancy between my home and theirs, certainly made things slightly awkward between us on the first evening, but eventually we fell into a rhythm, and when home, I mostly stayed in my bedroom, and they in theirs.
On the second evening, coming out of my room, I was somewhat surprised to see the door to my spare bedroom slightly open. Sliding up to the edge of the door, the triangle of light that spread across the room and onto the bed perfectly fell upon the scene of my cleaning lady sleeping closest to the door, with her daughter in between herself and her husband. All were asleep, and were seemingly unaware of my voyeurism. Lin's husband was snoring, not so softly.
While watching I was gripped by one of those dark thoughts that I have such a hard time turning from. Yet here I was, staring at her longingly, with a thought beginning to grow. The full thought, was not fully formed, but in growing, my body began to react, my breath becoming shallow, my penis showing the inevitable response, and my head feeling light as my vision tunneled onto Lin.
Even as I made my first step into the room, I was still uncertain what I wanted, but I knew I had a need to touch Lin. Without thought of the consequences of my actions on either myself, or on Lin, I quietly sat down on the floor next to her sleeping body. With her husband just a few feet away, and her daughter even closer, I sat there, next Lin quietly, watching her breathe. Up, pause, down went her chest.
My breathing slowed to match hers. My face, moving closer to her body, I couldn't help but inch slightly closer, and place my lips upon her bare arm, lightly kissing the round inoculation scar that all women in China seem to have. The kiss itself was light, to my mind, but I could tell instantly, that her sleep had been broken, and that she was aware of my presence. That very second, I paused, and in that moment decided that the risk was too great, my movement too brash, and that it was time to retreat, even though Lin's eyes were still closed tightly, and she hadn't made a peep.
The next morning, after berating myself for the moment of insanity the night before, all was relatively normal in the house. Lin was busy cleaning, her daughter was quietly at the table doing some kind of homework, and Lin's husband was simply watching the rain as it continued to poor down. By the looks of things, the risk of flooding wouldn't be going away anytime soon. Catching Lin's eye, I mentioned that I would brave the rain, in order to head into the office early today. Lin made a point of looking me in the eye, and didn't seem willing to make the fact that I had been strangely in her family's room last night an issue. And why would she? It was too weird. All appeared to be normal between us, so I offered that if the rain kept up, she and her family should feel free to stay an additional night. With a simple Thank You from Lin, I was out the door to dash for the subway line, and another long day of work.
As is my schedule, I didn't get home until 9.00 that night, well after Lin's family had gone to bed. While I was expecting the door to the spare bedroom to be tightly shut, the door was once again slightly open. The fact that the door was still open firmly held my imagination, as I took off my rain coat, hung up my umbrella, and headed to my bedroom for a hot relaxing shower. Standing under the water, I mulled the idea of the door not being closed, and almost as soon as I was done with my bathing, I found myself standing outside Lin's door once again, peering inside wearing nothing but a towel, and listening for the telltale snoring.
Even as the heat from the shower was still radiating off of my body, I silently stepped into the room upon hearing her husband's loud breathing.
With clammy palms, and a nearly imperceptible ringing in my ears, I once again moved beside Lin. Crouching, I tried to steady my nerves, and clarify what I wanted, and what I was willing to do, as I watched Lin's slow, regular breath move the blankets. Knowing that a gentle kiss to the shoulder would not suffice I cringed as Lin stretched and rearranged herself in a nocturnal gesture, but relaxed as that motion suddenly left the blankets slightly lower down her torso. Now, her flimsy t-shirt was clearly visible, as was the rise of her breasts, one arm outside the blankets, and one arm still hidden, the blanket trailing diagonally across her body starting at her far shoulder and ending at her near hip. I was very surprised to find that she was still wearing a bra, and I worried that perhaps she wore it as an additional layer of protection from me.
However on this night, my mind was determined and united with my hands to at least steal a secret caress from Lin. Slowly, and silently, my fingers moved to that line denoting external from internal, the ridge of the top of Lin's bra cup that held up her T-shirt. At first gentle contact, I held my breath, as if Lin might jump up and scream with this slight nudge. And while the rise of her chest held for just a second longer than normal, her eyes remained shut with her lips still slightly parted. With this, my finger tips just resting on this erotic line, waiting for a command one way or the other; my brain finally articulated what it needed.
Lightly at first, my fingers began running themselves over the outer edge of the cup. My fingers moved beyond tracing the edges, directly to probing, lightly pressing down through the firm material, looking for the promise and flesh underneath. I felt the bumps of the lace, the resistance of the foam material as my caressing became deeper. With eyes shut tightly, Lin turns, ever so slightly, making each covered mound equally accessible.
Then I knew I had been granted permission to probe further, and that at some level, Lin, either by resignation, or desire, had agreed to this unspoken arrangement. Tracing the curvature of he left bra cup, I was led to the right, but rather than remain on the outside, this time my hand sought access via the neck line of her shirt. Under the shirt, now unseen by us both, my hand began to re-trace the lip of the bra cup before returning to her skin, and seeking beneath the material. Slowly at first, and with one eye on her companions in bed, my fingers began to trace up the swell towards the nipples, but never quite getting there. I swept up, but then retreated, lightly brushing her skin up and back, up and back, until I was sure that the nipple would be ready and waiting.
By the time my fingers were brave enough to go for their ultimate goal, sure enough, her small nipple was erect, pushing up into the space between her supine right breast and the constraints of her bra cup. Caressing the nipple too was a slow, cautious thing, but soon my two fingers became bolder, stronger, and the light caresses changed into firm encompassing grips. Tweaking, and lovingly pulling, the nipples grew even longer.
