I waited nervously at one of the small circular tables just inside the door. I probably picked one near the door so I could make a quick exit if my nerves failed me. I nursed my club soda, playing with the straw, first in the glass swirling the ice cubes, and than in my mouth. Whoops! I jerked the straw from my mouth while looking around the bar. No false ideas or hopes. Yet.
I was in "The Club. A man's bar. A gay man's bar. Two pool tables. Usual counter. Tables scattered around the room. Lights low. Jukebox soft. Upstairs and downstairs. I had been here before. A long time ago. For a different reason. But I was here tonight to meet Bill. Bill was an internet chat buddy that I had met on-line months earlier. We had gotten to be good friends. At least friends in the cyber sense. After much back and forth, I set up a date to meet him in public.
It had taken a lot to get this far. I hoped in my heart that he would be as decent in person as he was in the chat room. Bill was gay. I wasn't. At least I didn't think so. I was married to a loving wife and after three plus decades I couldn't imagine anyone else in my life. Three kids and grandchildren completed my immediate family.
What the hell was I doing here meeting a gay man in a gay club to decide if we, I, wanted to take it to the next step? I glanced again at the opening door. It wasn't Bill. Just another man. I watched as he moved into and across the room. Greeting other men of various ages, appearances, and builds with a "Hi', or a wave, a hug, or a kiss.
I looked back at the movement at the end of the bar and it was Bill. He ordered his drink and looked around. We made eye contact, smiled and nodded heads. Gulp. This was it. Stay or run? I stayed. After all I was here to finally find out. Gay? Bi? Hetro? Fucked up? The latter seemed the most likely possibility. Still, I had to know.
I stood up as Bill walked over and we shook hands and than hugged. Hey! Not so bad. He, like me, was clean shaven. He had brown eyes with long eyelashes behind glasses. He wasn't Hollywood handsome, but very nice looking in a boyish way.
"Let's move over to a quieter table," Bill said.
I followed him noting that he was a little shorter than I had thought. Nicely built. Not gym muscle bound. Just a nice solid looking build. I was a little taller, but much slimmer. Bill had brown hair that he was trying to grow back after cutting it short a while back.
We sat down and started talking. Really talking for the first time. He related his life story to me starting with his marriage, through the divorce, and finally him coming out. My story was simpler, but confusing. We discussed my being gay or bi or just plain curious or, once again, fucked up. Really fucked up.
There was only one way to find out.
"Your place. Next Thursday. Okay?" I asked.
"Great," he replied, hugged me and I left.
I stepped into my bedroom and my wife looked up and asked, "Well?"
"He's nice. We have a date for next Thursday. At his place."
"Damn. Just be real careful. I don't want to identify a body as yours. Okay?"
"Yes. Don't worry. Please. He is a nice guy. Okay?"
"Just be careful."
It had taken a lot for us to get to this point. My wife and I had spent many a night and day discussing my curiosity. Why was I doing this after so many years of marriage? Initially there was hurt and tears. I had accidently (an accident? maybe? maybe not?) left a gay chat room open and she explored after a fellow IM'd me. The discovery was a real shock. I had repressed my feelings for many years and the internet let me explore them. Quietly. In my own home.
The best thing about finally getting my curiosity and feelings out into the open was I could confront them with the help of a loving caring wife. Her biggest concern was first for my physical safety. She was, and still is, concerned that a nut would set a trap. Beat me up. Kill me. Secondly were STDs. Wisely she was concerned not only for me, but for herself. I promised to be careful and to check each person out as best I could. Addressees and phone numbers. Trust my feelings. Run if there was the tiniest bit of doubt.
I stepped from the shower drying my body. Fresh shaved. My face and my groin. I had started shaving my pubic area about a year ago after reading about it in some of the gay/bi stories and seeing pictures of clean shaven men. Nice. I liked the feeling also. Wife seemed to like it. At least she wasn't picking hair from her teeth anymore.
I dressed slowly while listening to the rain fall. It was a welcome sound in Phoenix. October could still be hot and the recent thunderstorms were a welcome relief from the heat of the desert. I grabbed my car keys and walked over to the couch.
"I'm going now. Wish me luck," I said, kissing her softly.
"Luck. Be careful. Please."
"I will."
I drove down the freeway thinking and imagining what the night might bring. Bad sex? Good sex? No sex? Again - Gay? Bi? Questions. Hopefully answers.
I cursed the storm. A sea of red lights ahead. An accident on the freeway was backing traffic up an I would be late. The traffic moved slowly and I finally got off and headed East. Thank God for the internet. I glanced at the map and realized I had overshot the street. Back around and I found it. Bill's house.
I stepped out, quietly shutting the car. After all this was a clandestine meeting. Male sex might be involved... Who knew who might be watching. Might know me. Was I tailed? What was I doing?
I knocked on the door and in a few seconds it was opened. Bill peeped out an I realized he wasn't wearing a shirt. Step one I thought. He opened the door further and step two, three, and four were shot to hell immediately. Bill was stark naked.
Nude!
You know. No clothes. Birthday suit.
"Come in," he said, pulling the door open. I stepped in and turned around. He hugged me and kissed me. Whoops. That was different. I handed him the single red rose and looked at him.
"Uh..."
"Oh. I'm sorry. I'm a nudist in my own home. Guess I should have said something last week. Come on and take the tour."
He turned and now I had his bare ass staring me in the face. Or was I staring at it. No matter. Nice ass. Not a bubble butt like you read about about. Just a nice ass. His flaccid cock and tight high balls were fresh on my mind and I wondered at the fact I was still here and following a naked gay man around his house.
Like me, he had a little paunch, but was nicely built. Just enough muscle to be attractive. Assuming you were into that sort of thing. And I was. I had never had a problem with looking at men. And tan. He obviously spent time in the sun. Not dark brown. Just a nice overall tan. No lines either.
We ended up in his bedroom. Spartan was the first word as there wasn't much in the way of furniture. A bed and a desk. On the desk was his PC running a screen saver of naked male bodies. Cluttered was the second word. Just like the rest of his house.
He had sat down on the bed and moved over while we chatted about this and that. I don't remember exactly what we talked about.
I sat down and looked at him.
"When in Rome...", I said, and took off my shoes, socks, shirt, pants, and black underwear.
I looked over at Bill and he was lying flat on his back. He patted the mattress and I crawled over to him.
My heart was pounding and I felt slightly panicky, but I rolled over on top of him and we kissed. Nice! We kissed again this time using our tongues. Nicer. He was rougher than my wife's kisses. Heck. Everything seemed to be rougher. More muscular and harder in different places. Differently harder! Our cocks were smashing each other. slipping and sliding as we kissed.
And he was flat. In the chest. Well not completely flat. He hard long prominent nipples. Very long. I was to learn that they were very sensitive. On purpose.
We tongued each other again. Passion slowly rising as we made out clutching and touching each other. I moaned and all my fear was gone. I started kissing him and licking him while playing with his chest. I moved down and down, licking and lapping. He was only slightly hairy (another difference from a female) and I enjoyed the soft fur.
I licked and tongued his belly button and went back up his chest. Bill had left the lights on. It seemed almost clinically bright, but I didn't mind. He nipples were long. The longest I had ever seen; male or female. He told me later that he had made them that way using different tools. It also made them very sensitive.
I sucked on first the left one and than the right. Bill gasped and moaned and held my head in place as I tongued, licked, and sucked on his nipples. First one and than the other. I enjoyed giving Bill pleasure. Lavishing attention on one with my mouth while playing with the other one. Back and forth.
Back. Down. Tongued his belly button. Down again I went licking and kissing. I kissed the head of his cock. It was soft and yet hard. Not as hard as it would get, but hard none the less. I sucked on it. I realized I liked this. It was what I had imagined, but was always afraid to act on. No pre-cum. No taste. He had told me at the club that he didn't leak.
