Fool in the Rain (bi)
(Inspired by the song)
Elena left a message saying she wanted to talk. Elena - a perfect name for my bright latin beauty. Her name literally means 'shining' and when I look in her eyes I see a star that just can't wait for the night. She said she had something to show me. Anxious, I wrote the details on my hand: corner of 34th and 85th.
The rhythm of the city was as steady as a Bossa nova, drumming on and on forever as my feet beat the sidewalk.
Elena - as delicate as the tender plink of a piano. She's the one - I think. I hope she's my sparkling star anyway. But maybe I'd been blinded by her dazzle. Why, oh why can't I see her tonight?
I'm totally smitten by her. She's my world, even if I'm not sure I'm hers. She's got this warm smile that creates a burning in me. The thrill of her touch - it gives me fright. Even right now I'm shaking so much with this irresistible yearning.
The area she'd picked for our meeting was all wrong. Liquor stores and an adult bookstore. If she would just show up it would make everything alright.
It started to drizzle and I had my doubts. Alone there on that noisy street corner I mumbled under my breath kicking my feet: "You promised you'd love me forever. And you said you would always be true. You swore you would never leave me."
Looking up at the clock outside the drugstore I noted that she was now fifteen minutes late. "Elena! What happened to you?"
It didn't seem possible she wouldn't be here. She was the romantic in our relationship. She said a love like ours only happened in movies. I'd hoped so too. I mean, it really felt better than a movie. We'd built dreams. I'd hitched my dreams onto hers. She was supposed to save me from my dreary past of abuse.
But this wasn't the first time I'd thought I'd found the light of my love only to have my hopes dashed. So there I was, standing in the now pouring rain feeling blue.
I watched the people go by, shuffling around me, dashing between drops. Busy, oblivious to my pain in their hurried downtown travels.
I checked the clock again: Another ten minutes longer and then I'd turn around.
Time's hands moved slower and slower. My heart sank to the ground and the storm that was my love life, the one I'd thought would blow over: well the clouds covered the light of the love that I thought I'd found.
Was my light really gone? She'd wanted to talk...
I suddenly felt dizzy as the world spun around faster and faster like the hands on that damn clock that just didn't seem to stop. The traffic splashed by. The policeman blew his whistle. The throngs ignored me pushing past. I'm thinking it over. Every second of our relationship runs through my frenzied mind.
Why can't I ever find love? The light will never be mine. I'm so tired of the light that I just never seem to find. I'll just give up. I waited but I was played and this was it! I'm finished!
I see it in my dreams,
but I just don't seem to be with anyone for long. I deserve love too. I gotta get it all. I've got to get it too.