"Would you have accepted my invitation if I'd said I no longer had
Final Curtain
?"
"Of course I would have," I responded to Theo Kline when he'd pulled me over to a corner of the covered deck area at the stern of his new yacht. He gave me a hard look, though, and I'm not sure I convinced even myself with the bravado of that response.
He started to speak, but then the music blared so loud and a bikini-clad Rose bumped into his arm, so he drew me into the lounge. There were so many bodies under the awning on that fantail that I wondered—if only briefly—where all these folks would sleep. Knowing Theo, though, I realized that they'd be doubling up, and in some cases tripling up—and that, these being movie folks, some of them probably wouldn't sleep at all. We'd have to scrape them off the floor and ceiling of the lounge in the morning after a binge on pills, liquor, and sex in the comfort of international waters beyond the three-mile limit of U.S. law.
That's what the ship's captain, a swarthy and somewhat menacing looking South American by the name of Diego Alarcon, said when I accosted him on the way from my stateroom to the fantail, having been summoned by my host, Theo Kline. I'd asked him why we were steaming out to sea so soon after my arrival, and he'd answered that most of the guests were aboard and we were going out to international waters to embark the last guest. We were so close to the blockaded Cuban coast that my mind began to race on just what sort of business Theo had gotten himself into.
"I knew how much you loved that old yacht as a boy, son, and I needed to get you here," Theo was saying. "I loved the old
Final Curtain
too, but it's all about appearances, Clint. You should know that. You were born to the Hollywood culture. You should know that it's all about image and that reality is just an illusion in Tinseltown. I had boldly declared that
Final Curtain
symbolized me. But I outlived that statement. I reached a point where having an eighty-year old yacht was thrown in my face. People started saying my movies were old fashioned too, that I'd lost the edge, become passé."
I laughed at that—out loud. It was ridiculous to think of Theo Kline as passé. He was still larger than life and as handsome a devil as the plastic surgeons, beauticians, and personal trainers could manage. Yes, I could believe this was all an illusion of some sort he was pulling by still being at the peak of a dog-eat-dog career at his age. But he didn't look his age. And I could hardly wait to get him in the sack and find out if his continued reputation for sexual prowess was now an illusion too—including whether youth had exaggerated my remembrance of the legendary size of his cock when it was hard. Perhaps that was the whole of why I accepted his invitation: to determine for myself if he could still get it up and use it as masterfully as he had done that summer of my deflowering. Perhaps it didn't have anything to do with seeing the yacht of my youthful dreams again at all.
Theo wasn't noticing that I had clicked out on his rant. When I snapped back into the present, he was still holding forth. "The yacht had to go. And as soon as I bought this baby—with all of it's twenty-first-century bells and whistles, suddenly my movies were hailed as cutting edge again. It's all appearances and illusion, son, how often have I told you that?"
"Too often, probably," I said, with a grin. But, in fact, this rant of Theo's was yet another pet phrase of his that had helped me in my work before—and, for some reason, when he brought it up, I thought I probably should be giving it more thought in the present circumstance. But Theo had said something else that disturbed me and led me to my next question.
"What do you mean you invited me here because you needed me here? And why did you really send Gordon away today? Did you think I wouldn't want to stay with Gordon here?"
"Oh, god, no," Theo answered. "I love Gordon. It's true he isn't my only lover; but he never was. He's always understood I need variety. But no one has been with me as long as Gordon has. He's special to me. I needed him to . . . I'm afraid. Clint, I wanted you to—"
But before Theo could say anything further, the door to the fantail deck flew open, and several men, speaking in boisterous tones and decibels tumbled in.
"There you are, Theo," one of them called out jovially. "You're needed on deck for the arrival scene."
"Just a minute; I'll be there in a minute." Theo turned to me, and said, "Tomorrow. I'll give it one last chance tonight, but if there is to be no change, we'll speak of this tomorrow. You're my last resort to keeping this from bringing all of these false facades down. And if you can't help me, I'll have to . . . but I just don't want to think about having to take that step."
I would have asked him to say something now, to give me some connection to hang onto and to start unraveling this mystery I'd fallen into, but Theo was headed for the door, and I heard the sound of a noisy motor external to
Final Curtain II
, which, at last, had come to a standstill. We must have reached international waters, I thought. And that thought was followed by both a tensing and a release. Maybe now it would all begin to fit into place.
I got out onto the deck in time to see a small seaplane floating down to the low-swelling waves of the Gulf of Mexico waters and skimming the surface of the water briefly to come to a picture-perfect stop not 200 feet from the side of the
Final Curtain II
. A motor launch, with two men aboard—one of them appearing to be the chauffeur, Theo's "man," Jerome, and the other the menacing looking ship's captain—was putting out to the plane. The door of the plane opened, and a handsome, well-turned-out man unfolded himself through the door and crouched on the wing. As the motor launch reached him, the man pulled a stuffed duffel bag through the door of the plane and, with sweeping gestures, handed it to Jerome, as the ship's captain handed a smaller bundle back to the plane's pilot. The pilot then reentered the plane and quickly began to taxi across the low swells of the waves again and took off into the sky.
"What—?" I whispered to Theo.
"Shhh," he whispered back. "The sound's on." That's when he pointed toward the bow of the boat and up to the next deck—and across the water to where a second motor launch of the
Final Curtain II
was riding the waves. I saw the movie cameras trained variously on the departing seaplane and on the returning motor launch, and what was happening dawned on me when I heard the word "Cut!" from the deck above. I remembered the sound of the voice from my youth. So, the great movie director, Joe Blum, is on this yacht as well, I thought. And he'd just directed a scene for a movie.
"Who—?" I started to ask Theo.
"Just wait. Eddie Lund. He'll be back. He's probably the best actor I've landed since your dad," Theo answered. "He takes the parts now that Gordon used to take." And, sure enough, the seaplane had done a loop around and was coming in for another skimming water landing parallel to the
Final Curtain II
.
The last guest had arrived, and Theo told me it was now time for me to meet the entire cast and senior film crew over the buffet that the ship's crew was now laying out in the lounge. I was particularly interested in meeting up with Derek Dominick again—if, indeed, that was his name. I wondered if he'd be surprised to see me.
* * * *