Corey And Noah Ch 05

What had I done?

My mind was racing endlessly. Reece was gay, clearly, or he just really wanted his dick sucked. I supposed that I was only too happy to oblige. That's not what I felt afterwards however.

Guilt; guilt was the word. I had let Reece slam me onto my knees and suck his cock like an animal. I had let him fuck me in the face, shoot his load inside me. He was hot, sexy, but vile. I certainly wouldn't dream of repeating the incident again. After all, I am a man. Does a man have a dick slapping his mouth? Does a man allow someone to treat him like an object of pure sexual mania? For the first time in my life, as I sat in my dark bedroom, I realised what women must feel in some circumstances.

I was, as I knew women often were, used and abused. Reece had left me kneeling on the change room floor; my dick hanging out, my knees sore and my chin covered in saliva and cum. People weren't supposed to be treated like that. Maybe it wouldn't have been so bad if Reece hadn't just walked away. Maybe if Reece and bent down and put my dick into his mouth, or at least stayed with me as I cleaned up then I wouldn't have felt so violated.

That was after all, my first time. And never again do you get your first time back.

And what of Noah? Of everything I felt for Noah. Although I knew it was ridiculous, I couldn't help but feel incredible guilt. It was like I had cheated on him. But of course; that was ludicrous. I couldn't forget that I wasn't even his friend. He had shoved me away, allowed his friends to laugh at me; hadn't defended me.

'You asshole!'

There was a there was a crash from downstairs, which caused the floor to shake. It wasn't shaking as much as me however. My hold body seized up; trembling uncontrollably. My eyes were sparkling, holding back a storm of tears.

Why was I born to parents who couldn't look after me? Why hadn't I ever been able to make friends? Why did everyone ignore me, call me freak, and laugh at behind my back or otherwise? I had done nothing wrong. I had not provoked anyone! Why had I lost my job last year? Why had I lost the only thing that gave me the slightest piece of autonomy?

Why didn't Noah love me like I loved him?

***

The next few days were just about the worst of my life. When I arrived at school, the day after the infamous physical education class, one of the first people I saw was Reece. He barely acknowledge me, just through a glance in my direction. The thought had occurred to me all that night that if Reece ever told anyone about what we had done, then I would be bashed to a pulp. That was before I realised however, with a great wave of relief, that if Reece told anyone then he would have to admit his own misdeed.

Noah was the second notable person I saw. His actions were far more obvious than Reece's however. As I passed him in the corridor on my way to the library, he defiantly looked as if he wanted to say something to me, but I ignored him. I wasn't putting up with Noah's rubbish anymore. If he wanted to be my friend, he could get rid of his stupid friends. If not, then clearly I wasn't important enough to him. The thought almost reduced me to tears again.

Worst still was the fact that the footy season was quickly approaching. When I joined the team, it was mainly to solidify a friendship with Noah. However, seeing's as I wasn't talking to him anymore, it lost any sense of worth and fun. In fact, I was began to start looking at the game in the same way I had before I had met Noah. It was a useless exercise, designed to keep the masses entertained while resolving no problems and only creating more between rivalry and basic aggression.

I don't even know why I kept turning up for training matches. Probably to perve on Noah, something which these days only sickened me.

I hadn't wanked in several days. I would have erections all the time of course, but every time I put my hand into my undies to relieve the pressure, an image of Reece and his dick came into my mind and I promptly felt disgusted in myself.

***

'Hey Corey, would you talk to me please?'

It was lunch time on Thursday, and I had placed myself in the back of the library for some piece and quite. Behind the bookcase and with a history book in my hand, I felt a small calm in the idea that I was alone.

Or I did, until I looked up and found Noah facing me.

'What do you want?' I said rather harsher than I intended.

Noah froze, looking down at me.

'What the matter with you?' he demanded, frowning slightly.

I didn't say anything for a moment. I stared back at Noah, determined not to lose any ground, 'I don't want to talk to you Noah, go away.'

It looked as if for a moment, Noah would have. But after a few more seconds of silent staring, Noah threw himself into the seat opposite me.

'No.' he said simply, 'Not until you tell me what your deal is.'

'I haven't got a deal, I'm just annoyed okay?'

I could tell that this answer wasn't acceptable. Noah continued to frown.

'Why have you been ignoring me?'

'What?' I said, my mouth hanging open slightly, 'You can't be serious? After basically telling me to 'fuck off' the other day -'

'If you mean last week when you sat down next -'

'You know what I mean Noah.' I said, a lump suddenly appearing in my throat, 'I thought we were friends.'

Silence followed these words. The librarian a few shelves away was trying to swoop away two girls for trying to play games on the school computers. I watched the girls, determined not to look at Noah and reveal my burning eyes.

'We are friends Corey, we just -'

'Are we?' I said weakly.

'Could you please let me finish.' Noah wasn't frowning anymore. He looked at me seriously, a struggling look stretched across every fibre of his beautiful face, 'I can't control my friends. And – well, I'm s-scared of the idea of school without them.'

Yet more silence followed these words. It had never in fact occurred to me that the only reason Noah might have been friends with these boys was simply to 'fit in'.

'I'm sorry.' I said, and I meant it, 'I've just – had a bad couple of weeks.'

'It's cool man.' Said Noah, looking relieved that we weren't destined to argue anymore, 'Hey I should come and stay around at your house tomorrow?'

I froze. The relief I had felt in those few moments in which I had begun to forgive Noah, dissipated. It was instead replaced with fear once again.

'I – I don't know if that's such a good idea.' I said, attempting to give an air of breeziness, 'I could come over to your place again?'

'Nah mines boring.' Noah said as the bell rung somewhere in the distance, 'I'll come around tomorrow. Meet me at the quad after school and we'll head over together! See you later bud.'

***

As relieved as I was that Noah and myself were back on speaking terms, the idea of him coming over to my house caused too much anxiety. I couldn't bare the idea of Noah seeing the mess downstairs that my parents never bothered with. Or worse still, what if I had to introduce Noah to my mum and dad? The thought gave me shivers.

I had even considered not meeting Noah at the quad on Friday afternoon but instead, running home and barricading myself in my room. Considering that Noah knew where I lived however, and that I wouldn't want to do anything that could potentially hurt our seemingly fragile friendship, I decided to head to the quad at two-thirty the following day.

I got there first. The large square was full of the shouts and screams of people exited for the weekend. I only had to wait for a couple of minutes before Noah, in his ridiculously cute, short school shorts came walking towards me.

'Hey, wanna get going?' Noah asked, smiling at me.

I returned the smile, only because I appeared to have lost control of my mouth. The rest of me however was nervous about what would happen when we go home.

The walk to my house was all too short. Noah had only just started talking about a girl in our math class when we had reached my front door. Why did I have to realise now just how depressing my house really was? A fair bit of the red paint had peeled off of my front door, and a single pot which once held some long forgotten plant, contained only dirt.

My face burning, I opened the door and stepped into the hall. The carpet was, as always, filthy. I used to vacuum downstairs as well as upstairs, but I sucked up one of my mums earing's once and – well, let's just say that downstairs hasn't been vacuumed since.

Noah followed me, without comment, up the stairs onto the far cleaner landing above. Upstairs held only my bedroom, a bathroom, and a two spare bedrooms which I never went into. Due to my isolation, I had managed to make something of a little flat.

'Cool, what comics do you have man?' Noah asked when he entered my room and spotted my small comic book collection.

The weekend didn't go too badly after that. We spent most of Friday night in my room, just talking and reading comics. Saturday was passed by walking around town, stopping once at the arcade, and wondering if we should try and break into the abandoned manor on the other side of town.

That night definitely the most notable part of the weekend. We decided to head down to the beach and try and light a fire in the sand dunes. When we couldn't find anything to light it with however, we gave up and instead, walked down to the water and dropped down into sand.

The dark, still sea was stretched out below us, seemingly, its only purpose being to reflect the city lights which shone brightly across the harbour. The moon was brighter than usual, and the stars shone beautifully above.

'Do you come here much?' Noah asked, an audible amount of awe behind his voice.

I in fact had led Noah here. It had taken a couple of hours of walking through the bush but I knew it would be worth it.

'Yeh, pretty much all the time. Well, not for a while actually,' I corrected myself, 'but I used to. It's just peaceful. It helps me – think.'

Silence followed my words. The bush behind us buzzed with crickets and the odd few birds who still saw fit to be awake at that hour.

'It's amazing.' Noah said, 'How did you find it?'

I ran sand through my fingers for a few moments, delaying the response I didn't really want to give. Should I tell Noah the truth? Buying for some time, I decided it was hot, and pulled my shirt up over my head. Throwing it beside me, I ran my hands through my hair and turned to Noah. His outline was looking at through the darkness and although I couldn't see every deal of his incredible face, I could see his amazing green eyes watching me. When I saw them, I realised that I was being stupid. Of course I could trust Noah.

'When I was a bit younger, like eleven or twelve I guess, I used to get into arguments with my parents.' I said, turning from Noah, back to the sand. 'When I did, I used to go for walks afterwards because, you know; I didn't want to see them. Anyway, I just walked so far one day that I made it to this beach and slept here on the sand. I – I love the isolated feeling. The fact that I'm alone. It just relaxes me knowing that -'

My voice trailed away before I said "knowing that I'm safe."

'Shit, sorry man.' Noah said.

'Sorry?'

'You revealed your secret spot to me.' Noah responded, 'Now you can't ever be fully alone.'

I turned back to Noah who was still looking at me. I wondered if he had taken his eyes off of me that whole time.

'Maybe I don't want to be alone anymore.' I said, my mouth going rather dry.

'Eh?' Noah said.

I couldn't tell if he hadn't heard me, or if he wanted me to elaborate. 'Maybe I just want to be with you.'

The words had left my mouth before I could stop them. I froze. Every particle in my body seemed to be on standby. How I wish I could make out Noah's face in the darkness. Was it angry? Afraid? Disgusted?

'Hell yeh, we have our own little secret chill area!' was Noah's unexpected response.

Before I could say anything, Noah jumped up.

'I want to go for a swim man.' He said, pulling his shirt off.

'Yeh that'd be cool,' I said. I was still in a bit of shock from the words I'd let slip out, 'but I didn't bring any swimmers.'

'Who needs swimmers man?' Noah said simply.

Even in the darkness, I could swear Noah just winked at me.

Just like that, my body tensed up, and I became uncomfortably aware that there was a tent forming in my shorts. I didn't have to long to think about it however, because Noah was already pulling his shorts off. He threw them down beside him and turned towards the water. It was dark, yet I could still make out the outline of a long, soft, swinging rod in the night air.

I stood up quickly; I knew I had to do it too. It would simply be weird if Noah was the only one skinny dipping. Don't get me wrong, I wanted more than anything to share a naked swim with Noah; but the night wasn't totally dark and I'm sure that he would be able to see my boner.

'Come on man!' Noah shouted back to me.

He was almost at the water. His butt-cheeks were wriggling up and down as he ran. It was a moment before I realised that my mouth was hanging open. Closing it abruptly, I stood up and ripped my shorts off as well.

The warm night air hit my naked body. At least my balls wouldn't shrivel up, was my only comforting thought as I pelted after Noah. I ran at full speed, determined to ignore my hard dick slapping side-to-side, until I splashed into the water.

I quickly submerged myself fully, swam back to the surface, and looked around for Noah. He was nowhere to be seen. Thinking of strong currents, I looked around wildly until I felt a tug on my right foot. I kicked randomly and a second later, Noah broke the surface next to me, bursting in fits of laughter.

'Don't think of Jaws man!' he said, punching my arm.

I watched Noah laughing like mad and joined in. For almost an hour we swam around just off the beach; pushing each other; dunking each other; playing Marco Polo. By the end, we were so exhausted that we allowed the water to drift us lazily back into the beach. Slowly, we got closer and closer to the bank that we eventually became grounded and lay in the shallow sand. The air was nice and warm; the water coming in underneath us every few seconds was soothing and cool.

I wasn't even hard anymore. Not that it didn't take ages for my boner to go away, especially when I kept managing to feel Noah's dick and ass under the water. No, now it seemed, I was simply comfortable around Noah. It's not to say that if Noah hadn't turned over and taken my dick in his mouth, I wouldn't have gotten hard; quite the opposite in fact. Instead, it was just the fact that I felt I could be myself around him.

This was a sensation I had certainly never felt before.