"Bakla!" Michael used to call me out of nowhere. It's our native language's version of the word gay; or for the context, since it's used as an insult, faggot.
I loathed him with a passion. No matter how much I tried to be nice to him, he always returned it by mocking me. I learned to ignore him for the most part but it was hard to do so when he and his older pals hanged around the path we take to go about everywhere. I endured their teasing for quite a while but now that I think about it, they weren't wrong.
Something unfortunate happened when I was about to turn 19 but I found someone who made me think more about men; and soon I found myself focusing more on the long shafts going in and out while watching porn. I especially liked those where the men were aggressive and bossy. No matter how much I denied it to myself that I am gay, I can't help wanting to be the one receiving those sexy cocks. It made me fantasize about the crotches of the men around me a lot. As my fetish for being dominated developed, the image of my bully, Michael, making me serve him relentlessly invaded my mind. Rubbing his thick cock on my face to show me how he was right all along.
However, it seemed to be just a far dream when he seemingly disappeared. He discontinued going to school one day. I drifted apart from most of my friends so I didn't get any news about him for a while up until my last year as a senior. The guys Michael used to hang out with all grew up to get jobs; so I never got teased by them anymore. I learned that Michael ended up being a driver of a pedicab when my parents mentioned where some of my childhood friends were then. Though I never really saw him much anymore.
Most of the pedicabs in my area have the same design and appearance so for a long time I assumed that those were the general design everywhere. I learned it wasn't when I got in college and the pedicabs there were very different. So I feel like I have to explain something; the passenger seats of a pedicab are by the side of the driver but are at a lower position. The driver could see only the passenger's feet unless he ducks down. The cab by which the passenger's seats were placed varied in sizes, the bigger and spacious ones are the ones I liked the most. I could just lean back in one of them and get my dick out to jerk off on the way. It was very risky but the thrill only made me hornier. If I'm feeling extra frisky, I even let my dick out more as we pass by people. I don't think anybody actually noticed, except for those two other pedicab drivers who happened to glance a bit inside. So far, no driver has caught me or so I believe. Maybe they saw me but they just didn't say anything.
One night, while on my way home, I was waiting for a pedicab to ride when someone called my name.
"Jason! You on the way home?" The voice was familiar. But when I turned, I almost didn't recognize who it was. Michael looked like most of the typical dads we grew up with. No, not those kinds with hot dad bods, I mean he looked like a goddamn dad. Big beer belly dads is what I am talking about. His long hair is tied into a bun and he wore just a blue tank top which only made his belly very prominent.
"Umm, I don't think I'll fit," I laughed. A couple people sat at the cab and one more is behind him.
"Oh come on, there's still room," he then said something to the guy behind him that made the latter scoot towards him.
i awkwardly sat at the very back of the bike, and don't worry this is very normal in the Philippines. As long as you can find something to grab and keep yourself steady then you're gonna be fine; even if you just stood at the back of the cab.
"I'm just gonna get them home first, alright?" he told me as he drove the cab forward. "Don't worry, I won't charge extra."
I just let out a meek "okay" at him. I didn't really think he was being nice for real. His other pals do the same whenever I ride their pedicabs, I mean why would they outright insult a customer?
On the way, the bike sounded as if it's crackling then stops completely. Michael just pops the clutch everytime and it always came back to life. After a few minutes, we stop and the guy beside me hopped off. I then scooted towards the free space and so did Michael. My arm brushed off his broad firm back. His cologne wafted to my nose slightly. It triggered some fantasies I had of him and I moaned lightly at the prospect.
"What?" he suddenly turned his head slightly.
"Umm n-nothing." I broke into a cold sweat. Almost caught.
"So, uh, where you've been?" Is he actually making small talk with me?
"Church," I was assigned on the third service usually and it's held towards nighttime.
"Oh, how is it?"
"It's um, good. I guess," I'm not really good at small talk especially with someone I have never had any good interaction with ever. However I really liked how he's actually trying to seem to be nice.
I didn't want to seem mean, so I ask him something, "Is this your last trip for the day?"
"Nah, It's still pretty early. I've reached my quota but a little more cash won't hurt."
He then went on talking about his day while we ventured to the couple's home. I listened to him silently, occasionally sharing something back. Something inside me still want to hold back and don't raise my hopes up too much.
When we finally arrived at the couple's destination, I transferred into the passenger's seat. As I walked around, I looked at him and he doesn't look half bad. If anything, the additional fat improved his face. It made him look very mature unlike all those years ago when his face just added anger to his insults. I notice his eyes darting away from me as if embarassed. A hint of loneliness was in them. I wondered why.
Halfway towards home, something happened. The bike crackled again but this time, no matter how much he tried popping the clutch, it wouldn't come back to life.
I heard him curse under his breath before getting off and inspecting the bike. I get out and follow beside him. I turned my phone's flashlight on.
"Sorry, I'll just call another cab for you." he said, not even turning to me.
"It's okay. You can fix it right? I can wait." He took a shortcut that happened to be quite dark and not very crowd heavy. I couldn't just leave him behind. Even someone bigger than him has nothing against a mugger's gun.
"This could take a while. You sure you don't mind?" he turned this time.
I looked straight at his eyes and said, "Yeah, besides it's too dangerous out here alone."
He smiled and turned back to fixing whatever is wrong with the bike. I turned both ways to see if there's anyone nearby to help but there was noone. At one side of the road were high grass and a few areas with smaller grass where trees stood and on the other cracked high walls that stretched at the far end of the road.
I watched him busy himself, admiring his big strong arms clench and relax from time to time. I imagined gripping on his broad shoulders as he fuck me senseless. His calloused hands choking me and and caressing my nipples while he drove his drill deep into my guts. I wouldn't mind doing it at the road then, nobody's around anyway. My cock shifted and bulged easily under my slacks. I usually don't wear underwear since I always wear black pants. However, with the light from my phone, it would be too obvious if he suddenly turned his head.
"Um, I'm gonna try calling someone. We're gonna take all night long with this rate," he said to my surprise. I immediately turned to my side to hide my raging boner. "You okay?"
"Yeah, go ahead."
As he lifted his phone to his ear, he rested his other arm on the cab's roof. I could see the hair of his armpits and I had to bit my lip to resist not going over there to take a sniff. I crept quietly so I could get a better angle but then he turned, "They're not answering, shit."
"Maybe they're still driving?"
"Yeah, you're right," he sighed. "Well, they'll call back later I'm sure. We just gotta wait."
I paced around trying to calm my dick down while he sat silently on his bike. Lustful thoughts raced through my mind. Should I just go and grab him? Noone's looking anyway but would he be okay? What if his friends arrive? Oh wait, they'll have to call first.
While thinking of how I should approach him, he then turned to me and asked, "Hey, um can I say something?"
I slowly walked towards him but maintained a respectful distance, "Sure, what is it?"
"I just wanna say I'm sorry." This took me by surprise.
"For what?"
"For all those years, y'know?" he mumbled almost unintelligibly. I let him gather his thoughts. "I was just jealous, I guess."
"Jealous? Of what?"
He then turned to me with pained eyes, "You got the perfect life. You have parents who actually cared about giving you a decent life."
I wanted to tell him that his parents would've wanted to give him a decent life too but what do I know? I lost contact with him and even when we did have it, we were not close. I didn't know shit about his family. But even I have to admit, my life is not perfect. However I thought not to tell him that; it would just make me sound pretentious.
"Well at least you're doing something to earn money. It may not be the most prestigious life but you're on the right path."
"Still, I'm very sorry. Maybe this is my karma."
"Hey it's alright. Past is past and the fact that you're owning for your mistakes means that you're life might be turning around." I pat him on the shoulder. A moment later, he turned slightly and I realized that I've been gently squeezing on him. I playfully tease him that he's gotten quite fatter to release the tension but then I said, "Besides, you're not all wrong about what you called me before."
He shot me a curious look. I second thought about whether I should tell him the truth. He just opened up to me so it's just right that I return the favor right? I took a deep breath and say, "You were right about me being gay."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah, but only a few knows about it. You can keep a secret right?"
He smiled again, this time brightly that could've lit the dark road up, and hit me on the back, "Sure! You can count on me."
We joked around a bit then he asked if I've been with guys.
"Yeah, a few," big fat lie.
"What have y'all done so far?" he whispered as if anyone could hear.
"Maybe you want a demonstration?"
A mischievous curve formed at the side of his lips and he leaned back on his bike. I stood in front of him and caressed his thick neck. Oh how damn hot the look on his face was that night.
"You're not weirded out by this?" I asked.
"You think I haven't had my fair share of fucking already?" he pulled me closer to him and leaned over to my ear, "There's one more reason why I used to call you a faggot when we were kids."
