Twenty years ago
Approaching from down the street, Mitch parked his car in the driveway. He sat still inside the luxury vehicle as the engine idled trying to figure out what he was going to say to Spence. The words he had rehearsed over and over in his head were now absent. "Spence, I uuhh... Spence, something bad happened." He was growing frustrated with himself. Mitch sat there clutching the leather steering wheel of his BMW. "Spence, I love you, and I... Fuck." He clenched his jaw. Where did his words go?
Mitch had some heavy news to share, and he was struggling to find the words to articulate his mile a minute thought. Mitch peered into the rear-view mirror, seeing the frown on his forehead that had settled in for the long haul. Mitch was always the best with public speaking. He was smart and handsome, the type of guy that you would see as the spokesman for a business, the face on a magazine. He worked out and was in great shape. A clean-cut all-American man was the best way to describe him. Mitch had a short haircut, piercing blue eyes, and a jawline that went on for days. He dressed well, wearing designer clothes that fit his athletic build as if they were made just for him and made good money. Mitch was the type of guy that everyone wanted in their inner circle, but today the weight on his shoulders made him question it all. He had fucked up and there was no way of fixing it. Mitch was speechless as tears welled up in his eyes. He banged is fists on the steering wheel and steeled himself from screaming. How was he going to tell the love of his life that he had ruined everything?
After a few minutes passed, Mitch sat in the car alone. Spence poked his head out of the front door of their house stepping out onto the large, covered porch with a smile. Mitch was home! Spence was always in a cheerful mood, especially when Mitch was around. These two young men were lucky enough to find each other at an art exhibit for Mitch's boss. They were even luckier to share such a good life together. They had been best friends for a number of years, and they were unstoppable together. However, it was the late 90s and being an openly gay man, much less a home owning committed gay couple in the United States at that time wasn't exactly met with the most open of arms by society. Homophobia was still a rampant issue in the country, and it was the status quo to keep it to yourself even if you had allies. Even though they didn't flaunt it, Mitch and Spence were proud of who they were.
Spence stood there on the covered porch of their craftsman style home dressed in medium wash jeans and a green polo shirt, his red hair was mid length and combed neatly to the side framing his fair white complexion. His shoes while worn still had the appearance of being new. Spence waved 'hi' to Mitch, smiling as he walked down from the front steps towards Mitch's car. Walking along the brick paved pathway from the porch to the driveway Spence passed the garden he had worked so hard on. The white and blue hydrangeas hugged the porch railing and the lilacs and lilies stood tall and proud. Spence inherited his green thumb from his mother and he usually won the neighborhood garden contest.
Mitch hesitated to look out the driver's side window as Spence approached, but eventually he did, doing his best to smile back as he turned off the engine and quickly got out. Mitch was scared, and with a stammer in his voice he spoke, "Spence, babe, I don't know how to tell you this so I'm just going to say it. We have to go. NOW." It felt like years went by in an instant.
"Hey, are you ok?" Spence asked. Mitch just stood there saying nothing. Mitch realized what he said was in his head, no words had even escaped his mouth. His face was blank of any expression as he looked directly at Spence. Quickly darting his eyes away Mitch walked past Spence toward the house.
Spences eyes followed as Mitch made a b-line through the front door toward the bedroom. Confused, Spence followed his trail shutting the door behind him. Noises could be heard from the bedroom as Spence stood in the doorway. Mitch was opening the closet and dresser drawers tossing things around. He was so confused watching as Mitch hurriedly packed their luggage.
Eager for some answers Spence spoke up "A surprise trip? Somewhere tropical? Your parents? Don't tell me that your sister Connie will be there, she and her family are so exhausting with their drama..." There was no answer from Mitch. Spence decided to join in since Mitch seemed very focused. He hadn't answered any of Spence's questions, he hadn't even said hello. Mitch just packed what was quickly becoming random clothes, essentials like toothbrushes some cash and not much else. As he rehearsed in his head what to say, Mitch didn't look in the direction of his life partner. Spence was in the closet grabbing some of his favorite items when he stepped out into the room and saw Mitch holding a gun and counting bullets. Spence stood there shocked, if was frightening him how frantic and serious Mitch was behaving. Spence dropped everything to the floor. The plastic hangers slapping the wood planks startled Mitch. As he finally noticed Spence was in the room with him.
"Babe... what is that?" Spence asked with his throat choking up in shock. "Where did you get that?" Spence couldn't take his eyes off of the gun in Mitch's hand.
Mitch put the gun down on the bed and approached Spence who was trembling. Mitch hugged him close running his hands up and down Spence's back kissing his forehead. "Hey, hey... it's ok. I'll tell you later, I promise. But we have to go. It isn't safe here." Spence nodded his head as if saying yes, not knowing whether he should agree or not. He was unsure if he wanted answers to the questions that he was too afraid to ask. Rather than make things worse, Spence stayed silent trying to catch his breath between sobs and his body continued to shake. He had no clue as to what just happened, but Mitch had never steered him wrong nor even lied to him once. The love in which Spence had for Mitch was unmatched, he trusted him with his life. With no words uttered between the two from this point they loaded up the car and drove away.
Later that evening, Mitch and Spence arrived at a motel on the outskirts of town. From the lap of suburban luxury to a by-the-hour motel Spence went along. This was something he had no control over. Armed with only the things they haphazardly packed Mitch and Spence opened the door to a dingy room and walked in. The air was stale and smelled of shame, they both knew what had happened in this room not long before their arrival. They were both sure there were remnants of the previous occupants on every surface they touched. This place would be home for the foreseeable future. Spence laid a newspaper out and sat on the edge of the bed not saying anything as he watched Mitch lock the door and draw the curtains. As Spence contemplated the reason for this sudden change, he soon realized their future was as bleak as the tired room he found himself in.
As the days went on, Spence asked many times why they had to drop everything. At this point how this happened didn't matter. Spence was smart, smarter than many gave him credit for. He knew how this all happened. Mitch had done something to the wrong person, knew something he wasn't supposed to know, whatever it was Mitch always skirted the issue and avoided the situation when asked about it. Mitch would tell spence that the less he knew the better, he meant to keep Spence safe but was only pushing him away. Spence came close to leaving Mitch multiple times unless he had answers. Mitch would break down begging Spence not to leave, apologizing for destroying their lives. However, there was never a clear or satisfactory answer that followed. All Spence knew was that someone bad was looking for Mitch and Spence was involved simply by being his committed partner. He was implicated in a crime he hadn't the faintest clue of. Out of fear Spence stayed. He was growing tired of Mitch and resented him for his secrets but was fully aware that without Mitch he was a sitting duck
Several weeks had passed and things were quiet. Mitch had let his guard down finally; someone should have come to collect by this time, right? Nothing. With this newfound sense of security Mitch and Spence decided to leave their shitty motel room for a shitty apartment behind a trashy bar. Spence had taken a job at a small truck stop diner. Spence detested the smell of oil and gas along with the stale odor of dirty ashtrays and bad coffee, but he swallowed his pride and smiled his way to earning tips serving tables. Spence was determined to have something better. This was the new normal, far from what Spence was accustomed to before his life was turned over the same as his dining tables. To help make ends meet, Mitch sold his BMW. His flashy car in a poor part of town would stand out like a sore thumb to anyone who came looking. The two of them had managed to save up enough money for a small cash car. With this came a new start.