Standing in the wings waiting. It seemed like we'd been doing this fucking play for ever. Rehearsing since the beginning of January and now, mid-April, at last, the fifth and final performance. Halle-fucking-luiah!
It was my own fault. I'd allowed myself to be flattered into auditioning by Mrs Slater, who'd said she had "the perfect part" for me. NaΓ―vely, I'd conjured a vision of myself as a dashing Romeo, but my pretentions to leading-man status had been well and truly dashed when I'd been handed my script.
"Tybalt. Impetuous hot head," was scrawled across the top. A thuggish troublemaker, the Capulet cousin of Juliet. My character would be dead by the interval, killed in a fight by Romeo.
The only upside, and really the only upside, was getting the chance to beat the crap out of Mercutio, the snivelling Billy Smythe, quite possibly the most annoying guy in the school. His prime motivation for being in the play seemed to be the opportunity to ponce around the stage in yellow tights.
And Romeo? Do you even need to ask? Ritchie Gasson, Head Boy. The stuck-up, arrogant twat had been ingratiating himself with the teachers ever since we started here, almost seven years ago.
And so, there we were, the final night, ready for my final scene. This was the worst bit now, watching that slimy prick, Ritchie taking my beloved Amy's hand to 'marry' her. Amy, my Amy, the girl I'd secretly been in love for over a year. Now, as the school gossip went, Romeo and Juliet were shortly to become 'an item' in real life, not just on stage. I was heartbroken. He bent to kiss her and anger welled upside me. Still at least my rage meant I was pumped up for the fight scene to come.
The lights went dark for a moment, before Billy pranced on stage followed by one of the other boys. I waited for my cue, ready to lead my Capulet brethren out for the big confrontation.
The scene was in actually two parts, Billy and I (Mercutio and Tybalt) would fight in the first half, while Ritchie (as Romeo, now secretly married to Juliet and therefore my relative) tried to broker a truce. Maybe I was slightly biased, but I was pretty proud of the fights, and the three of us had worked hard to rehearse them. I'd devised the choreography (it really was more like a dance than acting) and every move had to be pretty carefully planned.
Although Mercutio was the first to draw his sword, the main aim of the first fight was to establish my character as the aggressive villain, in contrast to Romeo's peacemaker role. It was important that, by the time the second fight between me and Ritchie began, that the audience was firmly rooting for him, but also that Tybalt was more than a credible threat to Romeo's life. Establishing the treacherous side of my character was made easier by Shakespeare's own stage direction, that I was to stab Mercutio under Romeo's arm, after he'd established a truce between us.
The second fight was a little harder to design as the Bard had merely written: "They fight, Tybalt falls." The duel was to be evenly balanced at the start, to establish Romeo and Tybalt as 'worthy adversaries', then, to build the tension, we'd disarm each other, with our swords being thrown towards each side of the stage. The disarming sequence was actually the most crucial, because it was important for Ritchie's sword to fall in a relatively small area of the stage, but also with the hilt angled, so that he could pick it up right at the very end. Without swords, Romeo was unarmed, but I would bring out a dagger repeatedly swiping at Ritchie. The closer, more hand-to-hand nature of this part was supposedly more dramatic, and it had to look as if the tide had firmly turned in my favour.
For the climax, just as Tybalt might do Romeo in, the members of our respective gangs were to drag us apart. I was to struggle to break free, waiting for Ritchie to be positioned within arm's reach of the sword that he'd lost earlier. Then I would charge forward, roaring across the stage towards him, both arms held aloft, gripping the dagger above my head and just as I lunged forward to deliver the fatal blow, he'd flip up his sword and pierce me through the heart.
Piercing me through the heart, the moment he stabbed me with his sword.
Piercing me through the heart, each time his Romeo kissed my Juliet.
-
I'd fallen hard for Amy. The first time I'd seen her was at the Christmas concert at the end of her first term at our school. She'd joined us aged 17, when her mum had changed jobs and moved her family to our town. Although we were in the same year group, we didn't share any classes and so it wasn't until that night that I really noticed her.
I remember her standing on the stage, radiant, in a plain white dress, illuminated from above by a single spotlight - the embodiment of angelic innocence. She gave a performance of the Coventry Carol, followed by a hauntingly beautiful rendition of Lloyd Webber's Pie Jesu. From the moment she opened her mouth, it was obvious she was in a class of her own. Her voice was pure, strong and clear - her soaring melodies made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up like nothing before. At once, I was enthralled, captivated, smitten.
But getting to know Amy was not as simple as you might have thought. I spent most of the school day in the science block, away from the main building and our paths rarely crossed. Occasionally I'd pass her in the corridor, but she never seemed to notice the friendly smiles of acknowledgement that I gave her. In fact, it wasn't until almost a term later, that I actually spoke to her.
The school concert before Easter was more informal than its counterpart before Christmas. I'd asked to perform a couple of traditional Irish songs as a duet with my cousin Lauren (also in the same year group at the same school), accompanied by me on the acoustic guitar with her providing a steady beat on a hand-held drum. Like me, Lauren was a fair singer, but perhaps I should have thought twice about giving her the BodhrΓ‘n. I loved my cousin dearly, but it was difficult to describe her a subtle or sensitive musician. She was a big-hearted farm girl, with muscles at least as big as mine and if she hit a drum, whether with the tipper or her fingertips, everyone knew about it.
I'd been feeling confident in the week leading up the event, but then, with four days to go, Lauren went down with a virus and lost her voice. At any other point in the year, I might have considered this a blessing, but after twenty-four hours it was obvious that she wouldn't be recovered in time for the concert, and so I reluctantly made my way across to the Music Department to tell the teacher that we'd have to pull out.
Mr Lane was obviously sorry to hear about Lauren being ill, but was desperate to avoid yet another act from pulling out of what was fast becoming a rather sparse programme.
"Could someone else take her place?" he asked.
"Don't see why not," I replied with a shrug. "Lauren was doing the top line and I'm the one on the harmonies, and the tunes are easy enough to pick up. If you've got someone in mind, I could give it a trial run with them."