And finally, all the exams and thesis defense are over and the long-awaited diploma is in my pocket. Well, how long-awaited - hardly anyone has given up on the profession of philologist in our time, but... But now I have a higher education. I smiled sadly and thought with sadness that philologists mostly go to work in schools, and when I imagine a crowd of screaming children who still need to explain something and, in addition, monitor their discipline, it makes me cringe. Another option is a snack bar. Stand behind the counter and report that the cash register is free. Yeah... The option is hardly better. What else can you do? I have no other skills.
I took a deep breath. No, you can, of course, take some online courses for a truly in-demand profession, but then... Why the hell did I spend five years of my life getting the coveted crust? I'm twenty-two, no girl, no job, no prospects... The longer I thought about it, the worse it became. And even parents. No matter how you call, my mother will definitely ask about my plans in hints or directly. About relationships, that it's time, how can it be, and what am I thinking about... And dad is no better - his eloquent glances and chuckles are almost worse than mom's indignation.
Surely they realize that I am not only a virgin, but have never even gone on dates. Plus, we must not forget that after the fifth year they won't just leave me in the hostel, I need to negotiate with the commandant - and I'm still not the kind of dealmaker. This means that right now you need to either look for a rented apartment, for which you have nothing to pay, or return to your parents. Where they will drip on your brains every single day.
Shaking my head, I sat down at my laptop. I was already starting to shake from such thoughts. I looked at my watch to see if my neighbor Vadim would come soon. Then I remembered that their fourth year had left for practice and Vados would not be there for the next two weeks. When he returns, I will have already moved out, freeing up a place for another student in our wonderful renovated double room.
Eh, should I masturbate one last time? I looked at the door - it seemed like no one was supposed to come today. He walked up and locked it. And then he sat down and began searching on porn sites for his favorite category lately - deep blowjob in a position where the girl is on her back, hanging her head off the sofa, and the guy is pounding her throat so that you can directly see how his dick is walking in the larynx. It was always terribly interesting what a girl experiences in such a position, how she struggles with reflexes, and in general - can she experience pleasure from this? Suddenly, an advertisement to the right of the video caught my attention. Usually she was very intrusive and invited me to go to another porn site, only now it was paid.
But here - nothing like that. A rather modest girl of about eighteen wearing a pink top and a plaid skirt. She waved her hand welcomingly and smiled. And next to it is the text - "Virgin with tasty sperm required. Living together." And a phone. Telephone! Not the website address, not the button you were asked to click on, but the phone number! The most common mobile number, with the same code as half of the population of our city.
"With delicious sperm"... What could this mean? Maybe this is a site where they only post blowjobs? Then this is what you need. I clicked on the friendly blonde, but when I went to the page I found myself on a page where there was the same image, only enlarged, a phone number and the same text. And nothing more. I called again. No result. The thought flashed - what if I called? No, this is probably some kind of scam. I'll call and they'll write off all the money. Why do I need it?
Checked the balance. There was money left and the cat cried. The balance won't go into minus? What if he leaves? Then I remembered a program for checking phishing numbers. Although I had a hard time understanding what phishing was, I assumed that in this way it would be possible to weed out scammers who call and offer all sorts of nonsense. I entered the number into the program window and clicked "Check". A second later, the application responded - the number was on the "white list", no complaints. So, can I call?
And then suddenly the understanding came - yes, this is probably just some kind of escort agency. I'll call, they'll tell you to come, and then... Girls and prices. For some reason, the idea of sex for money didn't excite me in the slightest. However, if I just call, I don't lose anything, do I? Yeah, except that my number will get into their database and then they will start calling without a break. Well, why do I need such happiness?
Wait, if the number is on the white list, then it's hardly an escort? And then what? Is it really some kind of starving...? And probably not the girl in the photo, but some older lady... Who was attracted to young meat. I actually flinched. No, not this... I'll have to ask her to send a photo with today's newspaper...
Damn, what newspaper? Nobody has been buying them for a hundred years. Let him take a photo with this ad in the background and show the clock on his computer! So, it's decided, I'll call. In the end, as a last resort I'll just throw away this SIM card; I won't need my university contacts in a couple of weeks anyway. Later, when I thought about it, I involuntarily came to the conclusion that this was the most extravagant decision of my life. And the most fateful.
As I was, with my pants down, I dialed the number. After a couple of beeps I heard "Hello, are you on the advert?" The voice was male. Well, that's all, as expected - an ordinary divorce. And in an amicable way I should have just ended the conversation, but for some unknown reason I answered, "Yes, what do you mean?"
And the voice explained. Yes, he explained it in such a way that I almost came without touching my penis. It turned out that the interlocutor's name is Pavel Dmitrievich, in the picture is his daughter, who recently turned eighteen years old. And this very daughter needs a guy, and not just an ordinary one, but one who, at the first call, will provide his penis for a blowjob at any moment of the day or night, performed by this very daughter, whose name, by the way, is Dasha. Dashenka literally dreams of fellatio, her father's baldness was eaten away, so he followed the child's lead. My responsibilities will include constantly being at arm's length and being ready for kisses and various caresses, which, however, will not involve penetration. The salary is a thousand times more than my stipend. Literally - a thousand! At first I didn't believe it when the interlocutor named the number and asked me to repeat it. But for this money I will have irregular working hours and, possibly, nights.
Naturally, it was difficult to believe in this outright nonsense. It's almost certainly just a prank! But just... Prank from whom? Vados wouldn't bother so much. Classmates - even more so! So who's left? Parents? Complete nonsense! It turns out that people who could prank me like that simply do not exist in nature! This means that no matter how incredible the explanation is, it is true. I was already suffocated with excitement. I was literally shaking. Having collected the remains of my mind, I turned to Dasha's father with a completely logical question.
- Wait a minute, if you are willing to pay so much, then why not contact a specialized agency? They have... people with the necessary qualifications...
- Yes, that's the point! They don't have virgins. And if there is, then this is... Well, let's say, a very specific contingent. You see, I have Dasha... In general, she is not that experienced in these matters... Quite the contrary. I would even say that she is not even a beginner, but a trainee or something... Dashenka has never had a boyfriend. She never kissed anyone. And now I got it into my head... This is it. At first I tried to dissuade her, explained that this was completely unacceptable... But she stood her ground. And I'm not used to arguing with my daughter...
- It sounds absolutely incredible.
- I understand, and nevertheless. Are you ready to drive up for an interview?
- Um, what do you need for this?
-- You need a certificate of absence of diseases, but this is at the very end. And now... Could you send me links to your social networks?
"Uh, well, yes, of course," I shrugged and entered the address of my page into the message. There's still not too much information there - a photo of me from two years ago, where I look at least a little human, and a couple of music tracks. Perhaps I am acting imprudently, but... I called myself a milk mushroom - get into the back.
-- And also, your diet is important. Can you tell me what you usually eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner?
- Well, I'm actually a vegetarian... I love melons, and in winter, when they're not there, I buy bananas, oranges and so on.
- Wonderful! Simply wonderful! Alcohol, cigarettes, other bad habits?
- Never!
