Pam and I continued to enjoy each other throughout the remainder of the school year. We weren't really exclusive, but as for myself I found no reason to look elsewhere. I was more than happy with the sex I was getting, and my reserved complacency kept me from looking elsewhere. After all, why change a good thing. Although, as I now realize you may not know what other "good things" await if you don't try.
As for Pam, she had no such reservations. There were many nights she never made it back to our room, and when she did arrive she invariably had that "just fucked" glow to her. Being the golden haired beauty that she was, Pam always had a number of guys sniffing around. As you would expect, they all were hoping to get in to her pants. Many of them did, but even more were left frustrated.
I was never jealous of Pam being with other people. After all, neither of us was "committed" to each other. We just enjoyed each other's company, and we certainly enjoyed the sex we shared. However, I was jealous of the fact she was getting cock. Unfortunately though, if the truth be told, I had no one to blame for this except myself.
When Pam helped me out of my shell, I had lost just over 20 pounds. I went from a size 14 to a size 8. I now kept my hair styled, mastered my makeup, toned up my body, wore more fashionable clothes, and attracted more attention from the guys. You would think "what's the problem". Well, my first sexual experience with Scott was a disaster! He may have enjoyed it, but he certainly didn't worry about pleasing me. This has left me very afraid to try it again. I just don't want to end up feeling neglected and used again.
I may not technically be a virgin any longer, but I still have not had a guy fuck me the way I want to be. I want some passion. I want to feel like I am the sole focus of his attention. I want foreplay with kissing, fondling, and caressing for both of us. When we reach the point of desperation where neither of us can wait a second longer that's when I want him to enter me. That's when I want to feel his cock deep inside of me. That's when I want him to fuck me with reckless abandon. Finally, I want to feel the euphoria of both of us reaching our climax.
One Saturday morning I woke up in bed with Pam beside me. We spent the night cuddled together after a particularly exhilarating and satisfying evening of sex. My mind drifted to how we started out just teasing each other with little touches here and there. You know what I mean: a brush of the arm, a bump on the tush, a graze of the leg. Each of these heightened the sexual tension. Finally when we sat down together on the sofa we started rubbing each other's leg. This led in to some very passionate deep French kissing. As we kissed, our hands roamed. First there was a tender touch on the face. Then there were breasts to be played with. We squeezed and fondled and pinched while our tongues continued to dance together. From the breasts we extended our exploration to each other's womanhood. Our fingers were very busy teasing clits and penetrating love canals. While all of this was extremely stimulating, it was nothing compared to the tongue lashing we gave each other. I licked Pam and savored her juices until I thought I would wear my tongue out. Then Pam started her assault on my pussy. I can still recall the way she kept my pussy producing a river of nectar. When we put our pussies together and rubbed them to our final climax we both had to stifle our cries of passion to keep them from exploding through the entire building.
I'm sorry, I digressed. Going back to that Saturday morning...when Pam opened her eyes, I gave her a hug and kissed her good morning. I then told her I had been thinking about this for a long time, and I would like her help. I would like her to mentor me again. Only this time, I wanted her to teach me how to pick a guy to fuck me. Her response was "WHAT"? She said, "Julie, you're a very attractive woman with a sexy body, and any number of guys would jump at the chance to put their cock inside you ".
I told her, "That's the problem. I don't just want a cock inside me. Well, yes I do, but I want more than that". I then went on to explain what I was looking for.
Pam told me, "OK. Now I understand." She went on to explain that in her mind, there were two types of guys available when you go out looking for cock. First there's the guy who is in it just for himself. All he cares about is dipping his wick and putting another notch on his belt. If the girl gets anything out of it, that's a plus for her but means nothing to him. Second, there's the guy who wants to give the girl pleasure. He's smart enough to know that if he is taking care of the girl, she will take care of him. In the end, he will enjoy a much more satisfying experience than just "dipping his wick". There can be a benefit to each type. You may just want to get fucked, or you may want to get laid.
"Great" I said. "How do you tell them apart? They don't exactly walk around with a sign hanging off their hard-on."
That little quip must have conjured up an image that tickled Pam's funny bone because it took some time to get her to stop laughing. When she finally regained her composure she told me all I had to do was watch how they interacted with women. If they are commanding , self-centered or acting too macho then they just want to fuck. If the guy is attentive, doting and acts like a gentleman then he wants to get laid.
I wasn't sure I wanted to place much faith in the advice, but I did get what I asked for. I decided to just sit back and observe to see if she was on the right track. I didn't want to poke the hornet's nest and end up getting stung.
School finished for the year, and I had the entire break to watch men and couples. The more I watched, the more I was starting to come around to Pam's thinking.
By the time school resumed I felt like I had a pretty good handle on judging potential partners. Now it was time to see if this approach would get me my first real male lover.
