It was a leap, a risk, an insane chancing gamble to fly to Hawaii. Would you be there? Would you even like me if you were? The nervous energy just about consumed me the whole way. My neighbor on the plane was ready to punch me for the way my leg wouldn't stop pumping up and down.
I'm not sure I took a single breath for the whole ride from the airport. The taxi driver chatted away, but I couldn't tell you a thing he said. I did manage to "uh huh" and "yep" from time to time. I may have agreed to a luau. Or a multi-level marketing demonstration. No idea.
But a key was waiting for me when I got to the front desk. And somehow, instead of making me more nervous, I relaxed. I sipped the welcome pineapple thing and laughed to myself - well at least they've considered how the guests will taste when they get down to what we're all here for.
The ride up the elevator was slow. Some fucking teenager pushed five buttons. I was ready to kill and it brought back the nervous excitement a bit. I think the other people riding up with me noticed my aggressive humming.
I probably stood in front of room 1446 for two minutes. Did we really just get one room? It seemed optimistic all of the sudden.
But I had nowhere else to go. And of course, I wanted to see you. I just... well, it was a leap.
I knocked twice, firmly, trying to convey a sense of confidence. Definitely more than I actually had.
You were quick to the door. I wondered if you'd been watching me standing there. The door opened just a crack.
I heard the voice I had become accustomed to - listening late at night, touching myself. It was familiar but not at all the same. More human, maybe? More solid. More real.
"Come on in," you said.
I took a deep breath and pushed the door open. The curtains at the far end were open and light filled the room and reflected off my glasses so that I couldn't quite see you. Just your outline.
And then. My eyes adjusted.
You were stunning.
I think my mouth must have fallen open because you laughed a bit - not mean. But like you found it sweet.
You wore nothing. Well, not nothing. You wore a lei. Purple orchids in a chain that fell half way down your breasts.
A vision. A fantasy.
Your hair, your beautiful soft hair, up in a messy pile with a comb.
And you stood there for me, for a moment and just let me look.
It took a moment, but I collected myself eventually.
I set down my bag and slipped off my shoes and socks and closed the door behind me.
I stepped into the room and then up to you. You reached out your hands and grabbed the lapel of my jacket and pulled me in. You raised up on your tiptoes and lightly kissed my cheek. I was extremely aware of your breasts pushing into my chest.
Then you pushed me back a bit and looked up and down my body. Taking in the button down shirt, the linen pants.
I had trouble taking my eyes off your hard nipples and the way the lei bounced over your breasts as you moved.
You pulled at my jacket again and then time pulled my arms around you, putting my hands on your ass. An ass I'd spent a lot of time imagining, looking at your pictures. But it was so much more. So much better, in person. My hands fit around it it so nicely.
I was enjoying lightly squeezing it so much that I almost missed opening my mouth as you tilted your face up to kiss me. Your tongue darting around mine.
You tasted of pineapple. Or was that me? I was so lost in that kiss.