Sph Birthday Surprise

My eyes popped open. I'd been snoozing on and off for probably the past hour, but I was rested now and ready to wake up. It was a Saturday morning, and, I now realized, it was my 34th birthday. I was pleased, because my wife always does something really special and makes me feel like a king on my birthday.

My wife is awesome; there are just no two ways about it. We've been together for 10 years and married for 6. She's smart, strong, funny, confident and kind. Her name is Mei. Her parents were Chinese immigrants to the U.S., but she was born here. She's tall and quite voluptuous for an Asian; as far as I'm concerned, there's no one sexier than she is.

As for me, my name is Dylan. I've been teaching Physics at a university in the next town over for the last three years. I'm 6'1", I stay in good shape at one of the college gyms and I think I'm fairly handsome. My student evaluations indicate that I'm approachable, have a good sense of humor and make Physics palatable - even for those who are only satisfying science requirements. Anyway, I don't mean to brag, but I think Mei and I make a pretty good couple.

I lay in bed awake for a few more minutes until I heard Mei walk back into the bedroom. She was toweling her hair dry from her morning shower and wearing only her black bathrobe that looks like a kimono. "Looks like the birthday boy's awake!" she said playfully, walking over to the bedside, "how does it feel to be old?"

"I don't know," I said, "why don't you ask your parents?" Her parents really are ancient. Mei chuckled and sat down on the side of the bed.

She gave me a quick kiss on the lips. "Are you ready for your birthday present?" she asked.

"I thought you'd never ask!" I teased.

"Ok!" she said, and she reached under the cover and rubbed her hands over my abdomen and then gently over my thighs. I had morning wood, and as she brushed over the top of my pajama bottoms (yes I sleep in PJs sometimes), she feigned surprised. "What have we here?" she breathed. Throwing back the covers, she fished my rock-hard boner out of the PJ bottoms and wrapped her left hand around it. "Hmmm, it looks like a penis..." she said "only smaller."

My jaw dropped. "Oohh yeah," she said, leaning in closer to me. "You have a small penis, like a little boy. Is that why you like Asian girls? You think we're used to little penises? You think we won't mind? You think we have tight, little pussies?" Mei knows me like the back of her hand.

I neglected to mention that I do have a small penis – a bit under 5" when rock hard, and a little slimmer than average. And I get super turned on when people tease me about it; it drives me absolutely wild. It might sound weird, but it's been that way since I can remember. And because it was my birthday, Mei was being especially indulgent. To be honest, I think she thinks it's fun, too.

"What a little pee pee, you have Dylan," she cooed. "You're not going to satisfy anyone with a little thing like this. But at least it doesn't hurt my jaw like big ones do when I pop it in my mouth." (A few of Mei's ex-boyfriends were really well hung. She even had an Asian boyfriend with a 7.5" cock).

Now she took my raging boner all the way into her mouth, making the entire length disappear with ease. "It's not deep-throating if it doesn't touch my throat," she reminded me. After she took my penis out of her mouth, she smirked at me. "Oh, honey, don't be ashamed, a lot of guys have small penises... and just because you can't make me come with your penis doesn't mean you're not great at oral sex."

Man, she knows how to drive me nuts! My hard dick was drooling precum now. "Don't get too excited yet you little pervert" she commanded gently, letting go completely of my small dick. Now my wife clambered on top of me, straddling me, resting her warm bottom right on my stomach. Her sex was beginning to drip, too.

"Are you enjoying torturing me, my dear?" I accused her playfully.

"You got me," she admitted "now, open your mouth and use one of your body parts that's not worthless to make up for that small dick of yours." With that she shrugged off her kimono and pushed her pelvis forward so that her clit was pressing against my upper lip. I absolutely love her smell; it is positively intoxicating.

I devoured her fleshy, purple sex with gusto, taking care not to let my teeth touch her skin. "Hmm... Oh" she moaned, "you little guys sure can eat pussy." Mei had not come yet, but I could tell she was getting closer because she was beginning to press her clit harder against my lips. Then, somewhat abruptly, she pulled away from me and scooted backwards so that she was lying on top of me again with her face close to mine. Smirking again, she hoisted herself up and reached down to my crotch, guiding my aching boner into her slick vagina. It slid right in.

She squeezed her walls tight around my dick and inched slowly up and down several times. Mei could tell I was getting close to losing it, and again she stopped abruptly. Pulling herself off my hard on, she swung her body around so that we were now positioned in 69. "I want you lick my ass, sweetie," she almost whined, taking on the tone of a princess. "Be a good boy and put your tongue in my anus." I don't really like doing that, but when she orders me to, I get so turned on; she knows it.

I alternately licked her pussy and her rubbery bum, and I could tell from her moaning and the flexing of her muscles that she was pretty close now. My balls ached. "Honey, will you please keep giving me head?" I begged. "It's my birthday, please, I need to come so bad."

"No, honey, I don't want to put it back in my mouth with all my pussy juice on it," she rejected me. But she did wrap one hand around the shaft tightly and begin squeezing my balls lightly with the other hand. My genitals ached, but I didn't let that distract me from working my tongue like a piston to make her come.

Closer... she was almost there. Her grip on my nuts tightened a little. She was panting and cooing furiously now. Again she squished my balls tighter. "Aaaahhhhhhh." My tongue was working feverishly on her pussy and my nose was buried in her anus, which was twitching involuntarily, as well.

As she climaxed, she collapsed on top of me and relaxed her grip on my balls. Her chest heaved along with her breath. "Mmmmm, that was really good, Dylan."

"Thank you, sweetie," I said.

"You're welcome, hon." She slid off me, gathered up her Kimono, swung it back on, and walked out of the room. "C'mon Dyl, get a shower and come downstairs, we have a lot of stuff to do today," Mei urged. I did as she suggested; my balls were aching, but I resisted the impulse to stroke one out in the shower.

By the time I was showered, dressed and got downstairs, Mei had already cooked up bacon eggs and pancakes. We had a really pleasant breakfast feeding bits of pancakes to each other and then I cleaned up the dishes while she went upstairs to dress. "Let's head out," said Mei once she got back down, "I want you to run a couple of errands with me."

I didn't really feel like it, but I also kind of thought something was up, and when I have blue balls, I'll do just about anything she says! "Where are we headed?" I asked as we got into the car. I usually drive.

"To the DVD store and then the drugstore and a few other places," she responded. We don't have Netflix. We go to the DVD store. I can't lie, I was a little disappointed. We went to the movie store and Mei picked out a movie she wanted to see. It was Colin Firth or some such; I don't know why women like those movies, I sure as hell don't, but Mei was insistent.

After that we went to the drugstore; I asked if I could sit in the car, but Mei wanted me to come inside. First she went and grabbed a black marker; then she went to the isle with the condoms in it. I went over to join her and I realized she was actually going to buy condoms. I should point out that we don't use contraception because Mei is sterile. Apparently, several polyps which grew in her fallopian tubes make it impossible for her to conceive. So, I was surprised to see her looking at condoms, and shocked that she seemed to be choosing between Trojan Magnums and Trojan Magnum XLs! She finally settled on a 12 pack of regular Magnums.

With me in tow, she carried the two curious items to the register and bought them. I couldn't be sure, but it seemed like the middle age woman working behind the counter smirked at my obvious nervousness.

Our next stop was Wal-Mart. This time, Mei ran inside by herself and returned 5 minutes later with a shopping bag, the contents of which remained a mystery to me. I drove us swiftly to our next stop, the bakery; my curiosity was running wild and my lovely bride clearly had something up her sleeve. Again she went in alone and returned shortly with what I guessed must be a birthday cake for me. She admonished me not to peek at this one either. Exploding with a mixture of curiosity and anticipation, I drove us home, trying like mad not to exceed the speed limit by too much.

When we got home, Mei sent me into the living room, told me to draw all the curtains and get the DVD ready to watch. I did as instructed, and it seemed like I waited an eternity. Finally Mei walked into the living room carrying with her a chocolate-frosted birthday cake. Slung over her shoulder were what looked like two large white pieces of cloth.

As I peered closer at the cake, which had only one candle, I noticed that it was one of those novelty candles, shaped like a penis. Under it she had written in blue icing, the words: "It's small, but it's bigger than yours! Happy Birthday, Hon."

"This is great!" I laughed, "this is the best birthday present I've had in a long time."

"Well it's not over yet," she smiled. "Strip down," she said, "I got you something else, too." I did as I was told and was soon standing naked in front of her. My penis snapped to attention in an instant, responding to the gentle teasing of the cake and the subtle submission of my following her orders.

Next, Mei pulled one of the pieces of cloth off her shoulder and tossed it to me. I now saw that it was a t-shirt, and it looked like she had written something on the front with the black marker she had bought. I held it up and read it. It said in big block letters, "I don't measure up." Hmm," I muttered as I put on this tight-fitting t-shirt. "Thank you for the nice gift, sweetie" I said.

Mei just smiled at me. Then she took off her own sweatshirt and the two cotton shirts she had on under that (she always wears layers in the winter.) To my surprise she also took off her bra, freeing her lovely breasts. Then she too pulled on one of the t-shirts she had bought. It was a very snug fit, at least two sizes too small, I guessed. The result was that the white cotton material stretched thin over her chest allowing me to see the rosy purple of her quarter dollar sized nipples.

On this t-shirt she had written "Size Matters." The point was driven home by how her ample boobs strained against the ill-fitting shirt. Have I mentioned that she knows just how to turn me on? It was too much for me; I could no longer control myself. I reached for Mei and pulled her toward me, kissing her passionately on the lips. "Oh honey, you are so beautiful," I said, pressing my boner against the soft fabric of her sweatpants. "I love you, Mei" I said holding her arms and regarding her momentarily.

"I love you, too, so much Dylan," she replied. "And I'm sorry your little pee pee is too small to make me cum." We both giggled and then kissed some more.

"Hmm, ok, enough!" she said, slapping me playfully on the bottom. "Go turn the movie on." I walked over to the DVD player and started her movie. "I want you to massage me while I relax and watch the movie, ok?" she said.

Taking care not to obstruct her view, I began tenderly massaging her feet, working my way from her toes toward her heel. I was seated on the floor in front of her and she was on the couch, looking contented as she could be with a light blanket pulled over her.

She purred and cooed from time to time, telling me not to press so hard, or to spend more time here or there. Finally I had worked my way up to her upper thighs. With the remote she paused the movie and slid her sweatpants off. "Ok, champ, you know what to do," she said. The moisture from her hot sex had already soaked through the crotch of her underpants, which I helped her to slip out of now.

Without hesitation I buried my face between her thighs, taking my time, starting gradually so as to bring her along slowly. She continued watching the movie and (to all appearances) enjoying the head I was giving her. As the movie neared its end, I ratcheted up the intensity. I slipped a second pudgy finger into her pussy and began stimulating her g-spot with it.

She was soaking wet and the mixture of my saliva and her juices had dripped down onto my hand band between her cheeks. Ever so gently, I pushed my ring finger into her rubbery anus. Immediately it gripped my finger tightly, and Mei gasped and shuddered involuntarily. She grabbed my hair with both hands and began to moan loudly. Shortly, she started pressing her vagina harder against my face and swiveling her hips. And suddenly she was cumming; it was loud. "Oh," she sighed, "that was good." I knew she'd be sensitive, so I gently lifted my lips away from her labia and pulled my fingers out of her drenched holes. We rested together with my head in her lap and her stroking my hair for a good long time.

My balls were still aching when we roused ourselves as I still hadn't had an orgasm all day. Mei was cognizant of this fact but seemed determined not to do anything about it. I can't imagine why, but her keeping me on edge like that is at the same time both frustrating and titillating. Nevertheless, we changed into more appropriate attire and went out for a walk by one of the two rivers in our town. After that, we went to celebrate my birthday in a more traditional way with an early dinner at one of the upscale restaurants in town. It was really nice.

It was already dark when we rolled into our driveway. My belly was full of filet mignon and probably more red wine than I should have had given the fact that I was the one driving. Mei was a bit tipsy, too, and luckily we made it home safely.

Clambering out of the car, we made our way inside and upstairs, where we made a quick pit stop at the bathroom to brush our teeth. With my mouth all fresh and clean, I walked into the bedroom and plunked down on the bed. I lay on my back and waited for Mei to come in.

When she did, she said, "Ok, Hon, time for the last part of your birthday present." I couldn't wait. I was lying on my back on the bed, and she began unbuttoning my shirt with a tantalizing slowness. Once my dress shirt was unbuttoned, she lifted up my undershirt and began kissing my belly, swirling her tongue on my skin and working her fingernails gently over my upper body. I reached out to her but she denied me with a light slap on my outstretched arm and admonished me to keep still. My cock was acting as a (short) tent pole in my pants and I was aching to be set free.

Finally Mei seemed to intuit that I could take no more, so she relented, slowly undoing my belt buckle, top button and fly. She kissed my penis through the constrictive material of my underpants. She slid me out of my pants, and I hurriedly pulled of my shirts. I lifted my pelvis so that she could help me out of my underwear. Now I was completely naked and the petit bulb of my swollen member swayed inches from Mei's face. Her tongue darted out of her mouth briefly and in one motion she licked the entire length of the shaft. It felt electric.

Again she regarded my manhood before speaking: "You know this is the smallest penis I've ever seen?"

"I'm sorry, Honey," I responded with a mixture of shame and sheer erotic pleasure.

"It's really embarrassing," she continued, "when all my girlfriends are talking about penis size, I have to lie and say you're average."

Next she popped the little head in her mouth and gave it one quick suck. My boner twitched involuntarily. "I've almost forgotten what it feels like to be stretched out by a big guy," she carried on. "Freshman year of college, when I was with Philip, he used to make me come every time," she paused to gaze at me and let her words sink in, "and I could barely walk afterwards."

It was torture, exquisite torture. "My roommate was always jealous because she could hear my moans through the wall," she said. (The most she does for me is make an "mmm" sound while we're fucking.)

She gently gripped my inadequate pecker and swirled her thumb around the sensitive underside of the head. "So," she said "I bought myself a little present for your birthday." With that she reached over toward the bedside drawer. That's where we keep her clear-plastic dildo, which while modest in size, is still slightly bigger than me.

However, to my surprise, she pulled out a dildo I had never seen before. It was flesh-colored and looked like a real cock in every respect, even including a pair of hefty balls. I estimated it was 7 inches long and proportionate in girth. She held my rock-hard erection in her left hand and brought the dildo over to its side with her right hand. I can't recall ever feeling so inadequate, as her expression showed how poorly I compared with her new friend.

"Now," she said, "just to be fair, I'm going to give you one chance." With that she reached again for the drawer. This time she pulled out the box of magnums we had purchased earlier in the day. My throat felt dry as I tried to imagine what purpose she had with the large-sized condoms.

"If you can fill this out sweetie, I'll let you fuck me before we use the dildo," she said in a serious tone. "If not, we're going to use the dildo first." Mei removed a condom from the box and deftly tore open the package; it was much bigger than any of the condoms I ever fumbled with in college.

Mei climbed up on to the bed and straddled my right leg; I think she did it so I could feel how wet her pussy had gotten. I thought she was going to attempt to roll the giant rubber onto my cock, but she didn't. Instead, she rolled it over the tip of her new toy and pushed it down over the length of the shaft of the impressive hunk of plastic. In spite of the dildo's size, she could have kept pushing the condom down had the shaft been longer. It was really intimidating.

"A very snug fit!" proclaimed Mei with a grin. "Now, for you!" she said. She grabbed and opened another condom and began unrolling it over my aching little organ. The result was predictable; I was hopelessly unable to fill the condom and it hung comically over the length of my cock, dwarfing it thoroughly. Mei let out a genuine laugh. "It's so cute," she said, "like a little puppy." I was beet-red with humiliation.

"Looks like the birthday boy looses!" she chided me, "that means I get to have my fun first." She rolled off my leg onto her back.

The big dildo was back in her right hand, with the sizable condom still on it. She was lying right next to me, looking into my eyes as she rubbed the plum-shaped head of the dildo around the slick outside of her pussy. "Oh, baby, it's gonna feel so good to have a big one in me again," she was almost whining with anticipation. I inhaled sharply and couldn't keep from grabbing my own cock.

She continued rubbing, and then she said, "Dylan, I want you to watch this." She didn't need to tell me twice. I sprang immediately to the foot of the bed, from where I could get a better view of the large latex-covered beast that was about to penetrate my wife's fleshy little cunny. Ever so slowly, she pushed the tip inward, pausing every half-inch or so, pulling back out and then venturing back in a bit deeper.