From my twisted and very libidinous mind comes the following fantasy.
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I should not have shot my mouth off, but I am about to pay the price for my mistake. And I deserve all that is coming to me.
The cat-calls and whistling are humiliating enough, every time I bend over and pick up a ball, my short tennis skirt doing very little to conceal my lacy white panties, and the crowd of spectators seems to grow with each enthusiastic outburst.
I am fairly athletic, a former gymnast, but never much of a tennis player, and until this afternoon had never stepped onto a pickleball court, but I was so sure I could win, I accepted the challenge. Now, with certain defeat closing in on me like the breathless orgasm at the end of a marathon masturbation session, I can only reflect on how I got here and the well-earned punishment I am about to receive.
It all started one week ago at this very gym when I noticed a guy ogling me. Instead of just ignoring him, as I would normally do, I channeled my inner-exhibitionist and intentionally put on a show. I spread my legs a little wider than usual to fully display the camel-toe in my spandex work-out tights, then straddled the bench like a cowboy in a western movie, deceptively struggling with the barbell flattening my breasts while thrusting my pelvis and panting provocatively, melodramatically playing the "Damsel in Distress" to an audience of one.
Naturally he rushed right over for a closer view, following the bulge in his shorts to his intended quarry, like a dowsing rod leading him to water, all the while pretending to be there to offer assistance but unable to stop gawking at my breasts and the extrusive outline of my labia.
How chivalrous, right?
The trash-talk began when he told me he was not there to lift weights, his tone indicating that weight-lifting was beneath him, but that he only came to the gym to play pickleball, and asked if I would like to play sometime.
Was that his best line?
Although I really did not know anything about pickleball, I told him it sounded like a stupid game and I was sure I could beat him without much of a challenge.
I was looking for a fight, and I found one.
He did not look like much: skinny legs, pale skin, shorts too short and shirt too tight for his scrawny frame. And I had no doubt about two things: the prominent bulge on display was a pair of socks or a bar of soap, and I could beat him at his own stupid game.
I was so confident of the latter, in fact, that I not only agreed to play the stupid game, but also accepted the ridiculous terms of his bet: if I won, which was the only sure outcome as far as I was concerned, he would pay for my gym membership for the next two years; if he won, which was unthinkable at this point, he would spank my naked backside with my own pickleball paddle right there on the court, with spectators welcome to witness the entire flogging. Then he would show me exactly what my cocky mouth was good for.
Although I had never played pickleball in my life and did not even know the rules, I would have agreed to any challenge just to shut this squirrelly guy up.
So the pickleball court was reserved and our match was arranged, amid more trash-talk and back-and-forth bantering.
I could hardly wait to win the match and button this guy's lip once and for all!