A few years ago I managed a popular bar and restaurant, Sully's. I had taken the job hoping that as manager I would get to bed the hot young waitresses and barmaids who worked there. Instead I was completely humiliated when I was caught lying about my cock size. My downfall was named Krista, the hottest girl I have ever seen.
I had hired Krista a week after I took the job. She looked like a cross between Jessica Alba and Jessica Biel. From the start she was a real bitch. She had come to the interview wearing a Catholic school girl skirt and a white button shirt tied up to show her perfect flat stomach. Oh and her perfect grapefruit-sized pert breasts were not held back, or up, by a bra. She was both petite and curvy. I could barely concentrate on my questions. She saw through my lustful stares, and I had more than once caught her smirking. From the moment I saw her I knew I would do anything to fuck her.
Over the next few weeks I played it cool, even antagonistic towards her. I watched as every single male who worked at Sully's and too many customer's to count took a run at her. More than once I had seen shoot down guys with derisive looks, laughs and cutting comments. I knew she was single so her behavior puzzled me.
Her only friend was Ramon, one of gay waiters on staff. One day we started talking about Krista. I asked Ramon why she shot down every guy who came her way. "Rick, no one has what it takes." He giggled.
"What, they're not man enough for her? In what way?" I asked.
He giggled again. "She has certain impossible requirements if you know what I mean."
I did. And in that instant I decided to start down the road to disaster. I looked at him with as much confidence as I could pull off. "Interesting," I said with a look of smug satisfaction, pretending not to notice when I saw Ramon taking a peak at my package. I think he bought it. I'm a fairly big guy, so it was plausible that I was packing. He was never going to get a look at my thin 4.5" cock anyway.
The next day I went to a sex shop. I quickly found a couple of dildo/penis extenders which would work. I got an average sized one that I would use when I was "soft," to make my package look bigger, and a 9" monster for the right moment. Over the next few weeks I wore the smaller dildo. It seemed some of the waitresses noticed - it could have been my imagination. I should mention that we only hired waitresses who would look good in the skimpy shorts and thin revealing blouses that made up their uniforms. For my part I took on the attitude of an arrogant big-dicked stud. I stopped flirting for the most part, noticing an attitude of mixed curiosity and annoyance from the girls.
Krista also seemed to show a slight interest in me. She continued to be a bitch to customers and staff - though if there was a male customer at her table she usually managed to get a big tip. Her simple but effective strategy involved smiling while leaning over or even leaning on the customer. Once she got her tip, all flirtation stopped. It was comical to see the faces of the customers drop when they realized their 50% tips were not even going to get the time of day from Krista.
One of the more disturbing aspects of Krista's interaction with customers was the way she seemed disgusted by black patrons. She never crossed a line, but her antipathy was clear.
I continued to talk to Ramon trying to figure out how I could use him to get to Krista. One night at an after-work pool party I got the chance. Both Ramon and I had gotten pretty drunk and stayed late. At one point, I had noticed Ramon half-asleep on the deck chairs near some bushes. I noisily trampled through the shrubs, purposely trying to wake Ramon up. It worked. I took a loud piss a few feet from where Ramon was sitting, positioning myself so he would see the moonlit silhouette of the huge dildo and think it was my hard dick. After a few seconds I looked over to find Ramon staring incredulously. He had taken the man-meat bait "Oh sorry man, I thought you were asleep, couldn't make it to the shitter" I slurred. "Piss hard-on" I added sheepishly.
Ramon gave me a goofy grin. He was not upset at all. "My pleasure Rick!."
It seemed my gay little bird had chirped. The next day, for the first time, Krista had came to me and started a conversation. "Sooo, I hear we're having a staff party after the rodeo convention leaves town," she said, smiling and playing with her hair. Every year we would have a party after the rodeo convention. Because the cowboys loved to come to the bar and stare at our scantily clad girls, the rodeo convention was highly profitable for both the restaurant and waitresses, usually our best week. We would celebrate. After more flirty chit-chat she put her arm on my bicep, asking if I was going to stay for the whole party.
"If I find anything or anyone that keeps my attention, I could be persuaded to stay." With that I walked away.
The booze flowed at the after-party. I noticed Krista pounding down the shots. She came over to me smiling drunkenly. Amazingly, I was able to play it indifferent. She noticed. "Rick, why are you such an asshole?"
I smirked and looked down slightly. "Because I can be." I avoided Krista for the next half hour, until I sprang the next part of my plan. As I mentioned before Krista, did not have that many friends among the other waitresses. She was a bitch and they were jealous of her looks. One of her main rivals was Summer, a sweet little blonde with a perfect ass, sexy lips and a wide-eyed innocent 'fuck me' look. It didn't take much convincing to get Summer to help me in what I described as a prank on Krista.
According to our plan, Summer came up to me during the party, when Krista was in earshot, and following a script I had gone over with her, began a fictional scene. Summer did not really understand what she was saying, but was willing to play along if it meant humiliating Krista.
"Hey Rick, I'm really sorry about last night, I would really like to try again." Summer pleaded. I looked at her with annoyance.
"Summer, last night was both a waste of my time and incredibly frustrating. You're young, I just don't have time for someone who's so clueless about basic shit - who doesn't know what she likes or what her body can handle." That was were the skit was supposed to end but a sudden look of understanding came over Summer's face.
"We just need to go slow next time." Summer pleaded.
I took her improv cue. "Slow is not what I like." I sneered. "Get some wimpy little motherfucker if you want slow."
Summer looked crestfallen. She came up to me and whispered. "You've got me intrigued, for real, find me after you finish messing with Krista."
"You should be so lucky I whispered back." Summer quickly turned and left in a fit of anger.
It took no more than a few seconds after the scene with Summer for Krista to come to me. "What was that all about? Why are you talking to that slut Summer?" Krista was blatantly staring at the outline of the dildo in my jeans. I ignored her. She persisted.
Finally I replied. "I don't think you really want to know about my sex life and I really don't want to have you run to corporate with some claim of sexual harassment."