*Though this story contains no actual guy/guy action, it is mentioned. All individuals are involved are over the age of 18. Story contains mild blasphemy*
"Been a couple weeks," the extremely attractive woman sitting across from me said. She was quietly nibbling on a slice of cherry pie. I for my part was doing the same with a piece of pumpkin pie.
"Yes it has," I said. Truth be told, I had been avoiding her. She was almost forty, with all the good that came with age and none of the bad. There's not been many women I've been as attracted to as Lana. That being said, she was married with two kids and I wasn't even going to think about the possibility. Of course, when your family drags you to a church pie social, not knowing the true reasons you had been avoiding all church events for about three months it gets harder to avoid them.
"So where's the rest of the family?" I asked, trying to make conversation without giving away the wanderings of a young mind.
"They're in Connecticut for the weekend," she said, sounding vaguely irritated and relieved at the same time, "seeing Gabe's parents."
"And you're not with them because..."
"Because the last time I went to Connecticut and saw Margaret and Dave they pulled me aside and gave me the business card of a divorce attorney," she said with a sigh, I don't need that kind of negativity in my life."
"Hell's bells," was all I could manage to say, "and I thought my family hated each other."
"Oh well, I have the house to myself for the weekend." She said, taking another bite of her pie.
"That's always nice," I said, "a little 'me-time' goes a long way."
"So what does a young buck like you do when he's home alone?" she asked, "Play video games? Blast that loud rock music I always hear when your car pulls into the church?" she leaned in conspiratorially "bring girls over?"
The sound I made when she said that could best be described as a squeak. Were she not who she was I would have laughed, but being none other than who she was the question caught me off guard. "Uhh, not so much on the last one, but definitely on the first two."
"Oh come on," she said, "I'm not some old church lady, or your mom. You don't need to play the good boy for me."
"I'm not playing," I said, "I'm not exactly a good boy either, I just have rotten luck with women."
"How so?" she asked.
"Oh you know, being attracted exclusively to crazy and/or married women." I said without thinking, and then realized what I had said.
"You see now that is a problem," she said "but it doesn't have to be."
"What do you mean," I said, not sure if I hoped she was going to go there, or hoping she wouldn't.
"What exactly is the crazy you refer to?"
"Well for example, there was this girl I met a while back. She was hot and pretty buff, which I like, and we hit it off and went on a few dates."
"So when does the crazy come in?"
"Well one day we were texting and things got a little, uh, spicy."
She laughed a low, almost malicious laugh, "How fun."
"She mentioned, almost passingly that she wanted to..." I stopped, not sure if I wanted to share the next detail.
"Wanted to what?" she asked.
"Uh, do you know what, uh, pegging is?" I asked. She got this weird look on her face when I asked, almost scared or maybe disappointed.
"Yeah, I don't know if I'd call that crazy."
"That's not the crazy," I said. Truth be told I was totally down. The whole idea had sounded hot, it was the other stuff that made me uncomfortable. "I said I might be willing to try it and she got excited. Then she started talking about other stuff like..."