"Sir . . . . You affect me in ways no one else has. I crave to do things that I have never before imagined myself doing. My thoughts often drift back to moments I have spent with you . . . . and . . . . to fantasies of things I would love to do with you in the future. If only I had the courage to put them into words in person." (Dedication, you know who you are)
It was a Wednesday night, the usual night of the week she called him. Her call came earlier than usual and she had a special request of him. She wanted to see him. Right now. She wanted to talk with him in person tonight.
She had never really felt a need like this before. It was a burning deep down in the pit of her stomach. Her mind would not let it go, it just kept replaying different scenarios, with him, over and over in her mind. Some of the images she desired so much to live out. Some she was too afraid to allow herself to taste. Some she had already experienced at his hands. He lived across town from her, but tonight she was only a few blocks away from his house, so it wouldn't be like she was making a special trip.
"Are you busy tonight?" she asked nervously when he greeted her on the phone. "I am on your side of town tonight, only a few blocks from you . . . . and . . . . I really would like to stop by and talk with you in person . . . . if . . . . that is alright with you?"
He did not care to have visitors late in the evening on weeknights. He had to get up early in the mornings to be at work by 6 am, but something in her tone of her voice was different. Her voice was slightly shaky. He had never heard that in her voice before, it was almost as if she was unsure of what she was asking. There was something she wanted, needed, from him tonight. He wasn't sure why she felt the urge to see him tonight, but at the same time he didn't want to deny her. Her justification of being only a few blocks away put a smile on his face. He already knew she was always on his side of town Wednesday nights for a class.
"Alright, you may come over tonight. For just a little while, its almost bedtime."
"Thank you so much" she said, feeling the apprehension that had built up as she was dialing the phone dissipate. She was very nervous about making this special request. The last thing she wanted was for this wonderfully wicked, older man, who took her to places she had never experienced before, to see her as needy.
She pulled up to the gate at the entrance of his neighborhood and pushed in the code he gave her. The gate slowly opened. She felt the anticipation and anxiety building up inside her again. Had she made the right decision to ask him if she could come by? Should she just have buried her feelings of desire and gotten on the freeway and driven home before calling him? She had done that several times already.
She pulled up to his house and turned off the motor. As she walked up the steps of his front porch her heart began pounding. She reached up to knock on the door but it swung open before she got the chance. She just stood there stunned.
He stood there with a smile on his face in his flannel pajama pants, t-shirt and slippers. "Come in."
She walked in, shut the door and took off her coat. She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, her usual greeting to him. Her whole body was trembling.
After her kiss he walked back over to the sofa and sat down, turned off the television and turned on the radio, the local classic rock station.
"If you are thirsty go ahead and fix yourself something. There is soda, milk, water and beer in the fridge."
As she started into the kitchen he called out to her, "I'll have a soda in a glass with ice." He always had her serve him when she was over. It was not something she was accustomed to doing for anyone, but secretly, she would never admit it out loud, serving him made her inner being burn so deeply with desire.
She shuddered with a chill as she opened the cupboard and pulled out two glasses. Her hands were trembling. She filled his glass with soda, then her own with water and walked out to the living room again. She hoped he would not notice the tremble in her hand as she handed him his glass.
He was sitting in his favorite spot on the sofa, smoking his pipe. She loved the smell of his pipe. She handed him his glass, then took a sip of her water and set it down on the table next to the sofa.
She stood there in front of the sofa for a minute pondering what she should do. Normally she would sit down next to him and start talking, but tonight was different. What she really wanted was to sit at his feet on the floor in front of the sofa and rest her head on his knees. That was all. That was the whole reason for calling him early tonight, before she went home, wasn't it? She didn't expect anything to happen, she just wanted to sit there quietly with him, in that submissive position, enjoying his presence. Enjoying the scent of his pipe. Enjoying the feel of his fingers as he wrapped and then ran them in her long dark hair. Hell, not a word had to be spoken. All she wanted, no, all she NEEDED tonight was to be close to him.
She had never felt this urge ever before. She was a submissive by nature, but no one had ever captivated her in such a way to make her want to be submissive to them outside a scene, to serve them without hesitation, to sit at their feet and be their pet. It was a very new and frightening feeling, and she was afraid it might change his feelings towards her if he knew.
"Are you going to stand there all night long?" he asked.
"No" she replied.
