Life and people can at times be highly unpredictable and abrupt. You never know as to what the next moment, has in store for you.
I experienced the most fearful & horrifying moments of my life during the two or three minutes, which could have brought down the curtains on my life, right in the beginning of my married life itself. It was good to come out alive of the deathly and deep, gushing water of the river, in which I very nearly drowned during our honeymoon. In that process I found a real life 'Hero' and a child in that Hero, who suddenly turned me into a proud mother.
I have tried my level best to put that incident behind me and all along thought that the drowning incident was just a small and passing phase of my life, which had come and gone, and that I have now put the shadows of that unfortunate incident behind me.
However that was not to be, and therefore the memory and after effects of those moments still cling on to me. I couldn't have imagined that those moments would have such an everlasting and profound impact on my life and would in fact become a life changing event for me.
Even blood relatives and family members often become worse than strangers after fighting over petty issues, but at times, small looking events turn strangers into family, and that's what happened when this brave, loving and young boy Vicky, who was a complete stranger for us became a child like member of our family, by the virtue of his goodness and circumstances.
Our offer to Vicky to come and stay with us was a very impulsive one. We should have considered the implications of the responsibility that we were assuming without a second thought. However, neither Shantanu nor I had to ever rethink our decision.
Despite his tender age Vicky was mature enough and wanted to avoid another heartbreak and therefore wanted to burn the bridge of expectations, he had been taught by bad luck and circumstances, and in order to learn from them had to quit regular school. He neither had any greed nor any expectations from us, as he was well conversant with his situation, and discouraged us from making emotions driven impulsive moves.
As I later understood Vicky was resistant to being adopted by us because he was apprehensive that our feelings towards him may change after we get our own child and so scared he was of losing the love in future that he resisted getting it in the first place itself and therefore didn't allow us to do lot of things that would have changed his life at an emotional and intellectual level.
Vicky also hated textbook style learning and therefore another reason for his behaviour could have been that Vicky didn't want to take on the burden of studying. I even went to the extent of scolding him but he was outright resistant.
Despite being asked and given the freedom, he never demanded anything from us, and so much so, did not even allow us to offer him, certain amenities commensurate to the status of our adopted child. My love and emotions for him were mixed, I couldn't decide whether I wanted to be his mother or sister. He was only about six years younger than me, and yet I felt motherly love dominating over the sisterly love.
Our gratitude and naturally developed love toward Vicky, who was just a young fourteen year old boy, at the time when he saved me from drowning, caused us to make a lifelong commitment towards him. He evoked some emotions that I hadn't experienced ever before, I wanted to love him and care for him, as I would for my own child. The thought of paying him back for his efforts never crossed my mind, I just felt natural motherly love, which was bond that was independent of everything else.
We had instantaneously and without much thinking decided and offered him shelter in our home, with the intention of making his future bright. The decision required some big sacrifices from us as during the course of our live-in relationship Shantanu and I had become very close and carefree and even enjoyed nudist behaviour, we should have therefore thought about the loss of privacy that we would suffer because of Vicky's presence in our house, especially when we were a 'just married couple' but we had knowingly overlooked all that.
Strangely enough, as soon as our honeymoon got over we became parents of a fourteen year old child Vicky, who actually was my saviour in a near-death experience. I therefore don't know if this child should actually be considered the father of this woman? He deserved credit for what could be considered my rebirth. The saying that, 'child is the father of the man' was true for this woman, after the drowning accident during our honeymoon.
As years passed, our relationship with Vicky indeed turned out to be a blessing, especially for me because he was both a friend and innocent child for me. We wanted to consider him an equal but he wasn't prepared for it, he continued to behave like a house-help and I couldn't change that, even after the elapse of six years.
At times Vicky's stubborn behaviour frustrated me because I wanted much better for him but couldn't actually give it to him because of his own resistance and non-cooperation. I had with lot of efforts brought Vicky, 'the horse' to the water, but he was unwilling to drink it.
Vicky helped me with the chores only because he was always around and there also despite my treating him at par, he became my serving assistant, had Vicky agreed to study he wouldn't be around but as he was reluctant to study, and available at home, I couldn't stop him from helping me after I failed in convincing him to study.
As we gradually settled in and got into a routine, I couldn't help it that because of Vicky's display of consistent behaviour, our attitude towards him also started changing and we also accepted him along with his servant mindset.
Shantanu became very busy with growing his business and though his love for me didn't diminish, his physical presence around me reduced. As happens in most of the marriages, we were regularly indulging in sex but our frequency reduced, sex had also gradually started loosing its sheen, because of the monotony.
I may have been mainly responsible for this stillness in out sexual relationship because I wasn't really adventurous in bed and was promoting monotony without knowing the consequences. Shantanu on the other hand, wanted to explore much more, though he just wasn't too vocal about it, as he was a very considerate husband, for whom my wishes were of paramount importance. He certainly didn't want, what I didn't want, even if he actually wanted it.
Shantanu's new found love for sexual variations was a product of some interactions, which though unknown to me but had impacted and changed him sexually.
At that time I had a very narrow outlook and considered doing anything out of the ordinary, read fucking, outrageous and disgusting. Shantanu's path on the other hand had been illuminated and he had been granted power of knowledge to overcome his sexual deficiencies.
