I was busy getting things out of my locker at work when I noticed one of the teachers, Helen Katz, bending over to find something in her own, which was at a rather lower level than mine. Admittedly, as principal of John Paul Jones High School, I really shouldn't have stared at the exposed butt-crack, even the top part that Helen flashed me, but it was hard to look away. After all, if I had that much self-control, I wouldn't be divorced, pointedly for my own infidelity (though I sometimes wondered if she had been cheating and I just got caught first). I'm not a dumbass, but I had a wandering eye and always have. My sexual prowess is both my vice and my virtue, my strength and my weakness at once.
Luckily for me, I wasn't rich enough to lose my shirt, as the courts weren't about to stick it to a struggling teacher (I wasn't principal yet), even one with trouble keeping it in his pants. I think that, also, the judge was also a man who was perhaps a little tired of religious hypocrites like my ex-wife and may have shared my suspicion of her own adultery, because he kept the pain to the absolute bare minimum, making me lose only the house, no alimony (I was too poor, okay?), no child support (we didn't have kids yet), splitting the retirement funds evenly, and giving me the only vehicle that I really wanted in the divorce: my Ford Ranger. I was able to get the savings account, in exchange for my ex-wife Erica keeping the checking one, and she got all of the utilities, too.
If looks could kill, the judge would be dead, from the steam coming out of the ears of my ex and her lawyer after they got the bum's rush from his judgment. He even deducted the loss of my shirts that she lit ablaze on the front lawn from her share of the bank account and gave her an injunction, on pain of citation for contempt, against ever doing anything like that again. Yeah, on reflection, I'm pretty sure that he and I saw things more or less eye to eye.
Tired of living in a crappy apartment thanks to my modest teacher's salary, I eventually moved in with my brother Darren, who needed a roommate, anyway. I wasn't sure why he needed a roommate, though, as it wasn't for financial reasons at all. His current girlfriend, Salome, also crashed there and had started to pitch in with expenses from her stripper pay. Yes, Salome was an "exotic" dancer, much like her biblical namesake, and she made bank, twice as much as Darren and I put together on a GOOD week! What she saw in Darren, I didn't know, but it damn sure wasn't the money. He did okay as a locksmith, but nowhere near to that level. Sure, he was my brother and I loved him, but he wasn't always the sharpest tool in the shed. Then again, he had the good sense to avoid holy matrimony so far, so that's a leg up on me.
Anyway, back to Helen Katz, the sexiest teacher that I had ever met in all of my days on this green Earth, and that includes the ones that I recall from my own days as a student. Suffice it to say, while she wasn't conventionally a great beauty as most think of it, her ass was to die for and her mischievous, playful attitude gave me regular hard-ons. I found myself staring a bit too long, though, because I suddenly heard a cough coming from her direction. I could see why she was named after the famous Spartan queen for sure, as she looked even more desirable with a blush on her cheeks.
"Take a picture, boss. It'll last longer. Look...you wanna hang out somewhere? It's clear that you don't mind my company, or at least my butt's company, and I'm afraid that I'm rather attached to my booty. I would rather not be alone tonight," Helen mockingly chided me for ogling her ass as she essentially asked me out on a date, much to my astonishment.
"Well, if you're okay with something truly lazy, there's my place. You could crash with me, no pressure, no harassment, I swear, we could just watch TV or play games, eat pizza, hang out with my brother and his girlfriend, if they're there, maybe even get a little drunk. It's Friday afternoon, after all, and we're done with faculty senate, you know," I offered, unsure of how she'd take that idea.
"So...I could spend the night, right?" Helen invited herself now.
"Yes, you could spend the night, I believe. I don't think that Darren will mind me having guests, as he's urged me to have people stay overnight. I think that he either worries about me or wants an excuse to meddle, or else is easily bored, which takes some doing, since he's dating a stripper," I chuckled now.
"A stripper, you say? Maybe I can ask her for tips on how to get a man's motor revved up," Helen's eyes danced with her mischievous thoughts.
"Well, I can't speak for others, but I don't think that you have any troubles there, girlie," I laughed as we flirted a little more...it was a good thing that I had some clout as principal, enough to keep the yahoos and naysayers away from the school board before they could censor me.
"In that case, let's go. I have plans, boss. Fancy plans...and pants to match," Helen teased me some more.
"Hey, that's a quote from Newsradio, isn't it?" I caught on, making her laugh.
"Good, I hoped that you shared my tastes in TV programming. At least we both appreciate Stephen Root's comic genius as Jimmy James, don't we?" Helen winked at me as we walked out the door to the parking lot, "is it okay if I want to ride with you, boss?"
"Sure, but why do you keeping calling me 'boss,' anyway?" I probed, truly confused by that pattern.
"Because that's what you are. You're the boss. I'm a regular teacher. You're the principal. Ergo, you're the boss and you really shouldn't be taking your subordinates home, but I won't tell a soul, boss. My lips are sealed," Helen's eyes truly took on a devilish smile.
"Glad to hear, because I like my job, believe it or not," I told her, not adding that part of the appeal was access to teachers and mothers of the sort that I wanted to bed.
"I can see why. Sexy mommies, you know, the MILFs and soccer moms, plus some teachers that I hear might be a little hot to trot. You know any teachers like that, boss?" Helen snickered as we stopped by a liquor store to pick up some spirits before reaching Darren's home.
"You might want to stay in the truck. Someone might think I'm a straw buyer if they see you, 'cause there's no way that you look older than twenty, tops," I teased Helen a little, but she honestly didn't look her age at all.
Of course, instead of staying in the truck, Helen not only followed me into the store, she took my hand as if we were lovers. She even put her arms around my waist a few times, and there was the open-mouthed tongue kiss that she gave me in front of the whole store. I thought for sure that she was teasing and joking, but I enjoyed the kiss and played along. After all, if nothing, it made me look like a stud and nobody there likely recognized me as a principal or her as a teacher. It might even draw some interest and attention from other girls who really would desire me that way. It was a fun game, anyway, right? Besides, Helen was one hell of a kisser. That girl knew her moves when it came to kissing for sure!
"Oh, God, man, where did you get that kind of game?" the store clerk blurted aloud before catching herself.
"Game?" I inquired, truly curious.
"Yeah, man, I'd give my right tit to be able to land a chick like her!" the cashier declared, "sorry if that's shocking, but it's not as easy to be a lesbian as you think."
"Hey, girlie, if you're gay, you have at least one advantage. You're a girl. You know how girls think and feel, because that's how you think and feel, too, at least somewhat. Just think of what might appeal to you and do it for her," Helen suggested, making the cashier blush a little and nod.
"Yeah, she's not just a pretty face," I assured the Sapphic clerk.
