Summary: Son calls Mom to tell her about his Cheating Girlfriend. Mom encourages him to share every dirty detail.
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RING RING RING
"Hello"
"Mom"
"Hi honey, what's wrong? Is everything alright?"
"Is dad there?"
"No, your dad's not back from his trip."
"What time is it?"
"It's 3am. I'm sorry for calling so late, mom."
"Are you alright, You sound upset, baby?"
"That slut..."
"Calm down Sweetie. Mommy is right here, Take a deep breath and tell me what happened."
"Ashley is cheating on me."
"Your girlfriend is cheating on you? Ashley is such a sweet girl and you two look adorable together. I thought she was just so perfect for you."
"That's what I thought too."
"You know she is also my best friend's daughter. She and I have known each other since college. So I don't want my friendship to be ruined because of some small misunderstanding."
"I know, mom."
"Are you sure that it was her, honey? Maybe it was dark and you saw someone else."
"I know what I saw mom. Why would I make this up? That slut was cheating on me..."
"Okay before you start accusing her of being a cheating slut, why don't you tell me what happened?"
"That bitch lied to my face,"
"I know you're angry but that does not mean you use such language. I didn't raise my boy that way. Now I want you to calm down, take a deep breath and tell me what happened? What did you see?"
"You want me to tell you what happened? But why?"
"Because I know a lot of guys who just see something innocent and just jump to conclusions."
"But, mom-"
"Her mom is my best friend and if this comes up, I need to know what really happened. I just can't walk up to her and accuse her daughter of being a slut?"
"Ok, I guess you have a point there,"
"Yes, tell me everything that happened so that I can be sure."
"Ashley and I were supposed to go out and she called to say she wasn't feeling well."
"Ok, sounds pretty normal so far."
"I bought some medicine, soup from her favourite place and went to her dorm to surprise her."
"Oh that's so sweet. I am so proud of you baby. So what happened next?"
"I went to her dorm room and before I could knock on the door. I heard a moan."
"Yeah, I know how thin your college dorm room walls are."
"How do you know that?"
"It was just so awkward the last time I was there."
"What do you mean?"
"Do you remember how you had classes and I had to wait in your dorm room. Let's just say your room neighbours weren't exactly studying."
"Oh Shit"
"They were pretty loud and graphic."
"I'm sorry about that, mom."
"It's ok, It's not your fault. Do you still have that trophy of yours on your table sweetie? The one that looks like that gherkin building."
"Yes, why?"
"Oh nothing sweetheart I was just curious that's all. I guess I should've washed....I mean cleaned your room more thoroughly before I left."
"Ok, I guess."
"Then what happened, Baby?"
"I heard Ashley say 'that is such a huge cock.'"
"Sweetie, you said you were standing outside the door. How did you know it was your girlfriend?"
"I knew I had to be sure, so I peeped inside through the keyhole."
"You were peeping into a girl's room? That is not how I raised you, young man."
"Ok, I'm sorry."
"So what did you see inside?"
"Are you sure? Because I mean-"
"Of course I need to know. How else do you think I can prove to my best friend that her daughter is a slut."
"I saw Ashley on her knees and she was jerking off this huge cock right in front of her."
"Just so that I get all the facts right. So how long would you say this cock was?"
"Mom, What?"
"Baby, I am just trying to be thorough here. Every detail matters."
"But, why do you want to know how big he was?"
"Well, If the other guy's cock... I mean penis was smaller than yours then she obviously has no reason to cheat on you."
"He was bigger than me, almost ten inches."
"And how big are you sweetie?"
"Mom, this is so embarrassing."
"Ok, I'm sorry. Maybe just tell me how much bigger he is than you?"
"Five inches more than me"
"Almost five inches bigger than you? That makes you five inches. That's half..."
"Mom, This is why I didn't-"
"That's... that's not so bad, baby. You have a perfect average size penis."
Mom, This is so embarrassing."
"Yeah I know baby. I know it's awkward. But think of it like therapy. I want you to tell me everything."